


The Price of Power

by VioletFlowerz



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Angst, Darkness rises, Emperor Kylo Ren, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Eventual Romance, F/M, Fluff and Humor, Force Bond (Star Wars), Forgiveness, Jedi Knight Rey, M/M, Post-TLJ, Reunions, Reylo - Freeform, Romance, Slow Burn, Stranded, working together
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-04
Updated: 2018-01-04
Packaged: 2019-02-28 01:04:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 75,202
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13260348
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VioletFlowerz/pseuds/VioletFlowerz
Summary: Three years after the Battle of Crait, the resistance is faced with the wrath of the First order and their new leader, Kylo Ren. Rey has managed to complete her Jedi training and now holds the high rank of a Jedi Knight in the Resistance, but she still is haunted by the past- more specifically Kylo Ren. Meanwhile, Kylo Ren faces the periles of his new position of Supreme Leader of the First Order and the pressure of Power . As lines are blurred, our heros find themselves on one hell of a ride.





	1. Flash Forward

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone! I'm excited to start writting my first Force Awakens/Last Jedi story! I loved the Last Jedi and I love these characters, so I hope you bear with me as I try to tell the story that I have planned for these characters! Much love :) Also I’m very new to AO3 so I apologize for any format errors and what not, I’m still figuring it out hehe

The Price of Power:

Three Years after the Battle of Crait

 

"Rey! You coming?" 

She could hear the eager voices of her friends echo through the small hallway that connected their chambers. 

"Yeah, I'll be there in a second!"

She called out as she finished up some final touches on her hair that now fell to the middle of her back in soft chocolate waves. She had finsly managed to place the delicate gold hair piece Leia had given her neatly in her hair- granted it took her about an hour to get right- before she stood up from the small vanity. Taking in a deep breath, she let it slowly quell the adrenaline that violently coursed through her vains from an early morning mission to a nearby planet. She had successfuly led a team onto the scarcily populated First Order base where they were able to destory the information they had filed on the location of the Ressistance base; which they were forced to change more times than she cared to admit over the course of three years. They had finally settled on the lightly forested planet of Voss when they got word of the files the First Order had on them. It was a good call to destroy those files instead of move to another plant yet again. She was starting to like it here. 

The transition had been hard in the beginning, especially the task of completing her Jedi training, but somehow she managed to make it through alright. Of course Master Luke made an appearance or two when she was completely stumped, but she was finally a Jedi. A real life Jedi. She finally knew her place in this, and it was with the Resistance. 

However, she had a bit of a scare earlier. It had been a long time since she had to step on First Order grounds and it practically devoured her. She had been so shaken at one point, she failed to sense the shift in the force as a storm trooper fired his weapon at her. Her hands still shook as visions of the past danced vividly through her head as if she were reliving it. She recalled holding onto one of the soldiers who had taken a bullet for her as he took his final breath. His eyes, his dark eyes turing glassy as his body slumped into her arms. Tears clouded her vision as she was forced to leave him. She was only brought out of the nightmare when she heard Finn's voice shouting from around the corner, "Okay, but hurry up! BB-8 says you don't want to miss diner again!"

"Save me a spot!" 

She yelled back before turning to a small wooden carved chest placed neatly at the end of her bunk. Her delicate fingers unlatched the rusty clasp before she reached for a thick cowl to throw on over her shoulders. The planet they had taken up was close to the outer rim and because of that it was always freezing cold at night. Well, that and the fact that her body still hasn't aclimated to cold weather. 

She stood up quickly, rubbing away the goosebumps as she heard someone clear their throat behind her. Craning her head around, her eyes fell on the dashing face of Poe Dameron who was leaning casually against her door frame. His eyebrows were pushed together, a concerned look marring his features, "Hey, you okay? You've been stuck in your room since we got back from the raid."

Her eyes darted to the small animated droid who wheeled through the pilots legs and into her room before she looked back up to Poe and responded, "I'm fine. I just needed some time to unwind."

He pushed off of the door frame and slowly strolled into her room, effectively closing the space between them. A small smile slowly grew on his face until it was a lopsided smirk. His hand moved to brush back a strand of hair that had fallen into her face as he spoke softly, "I understand. Take your time Rey, we'll be waiting for you when you're ready. Right BB?"

Warmth flooded to her cheeks at the gentle gesture as she looked down at her feet. Poe Dameron was charming indeed, but she couldn't shake the feeling of deep dark eyes peering into her neck. She smiled brightly as the circular droid beeped excitedly between their feet. She managed to reply calmly,

"Thank you Poe. I'll see you in a few."

As soon as Poe was out the door, Rey softly pushed through the force to close the door behind him. With that she reached for the chrome cylinder that she had reconstructed soon after the unfortune incident on Snoke's ship. It was a tad longer than before, with an opening on eachside where the glowing blue blade would erupt to form a double edged saber. She was far more comfortable with this length due to her comfortability with a bowstaff. As the hilt met her hand, she twirled it once for dramatic flare before clipping it to her side and heading for the door. 

Before she could reach the knob, she felt the sudden drop in the air around her. It was something she had grown acustomed to the last few years, but something that never got easier. The feeling of someone tugging on her from across the galaxy. 

She made a vow to herself to never open up the barrier she had erected between them because she knew she wouldn't be able to turn away if she saw him again - if she saw those eyes again. The eyes that were filled with conflict and pain but also had a vast intensity that spoke of compassion and intellect. She would be lying to herself if she had not seen those very eyes in her dreams at night - the eyes that pleaded, no begged for her to stay. There was something so raw and open between the two of them, but she had to shut him out- if not for the resistance, then for herself. Her emotions towards him were still too raw for her to make a decision regaurding the new supreme leader. Nevertheless Kylo Ren tried, as he had time and time again, to make contact with her.

She let out a deep sigh before blocking out the desparate feeling and made her way out into the cold night air.< * 

He tried, as he did many times over the years, to reach out to her but he was met with the same brick wall that she had built between them years ago; nothing had changed. He didn't know why he still tried with her when the feelings of abandonment and rejection felt like a fresh wound everytime. Rey, the scavenger, the Jedi. He couldn't forget her even if he tried. He couldn''t forget the way she looked up at him in the elevator, like he was important. Never had he felt so needed, so secure in his life. Maybe it was the common sense of lonliness or the need to find a belonging, but something about the girl made his heart leap out of his chest. 

He was brought back into reality when the adenoidal voice of Hux cut through the space, 

"Supreme Leader, we've lost signal on the resistance's coordinates. They have managed to disengage one of our locations in the outer rim somehow. Might I suggest we send out a patrol near the surrounding planets in case they were foolish enough to stay nearby?" 

He brushed the general off like usual, "That won't be necessary."

He tried his best to hold back the anger that reverberated through him as the general protested, "But if we attack them now while they are off gaurd, we might be able to put an end to them for good! Their supplies are still too low to fight back accordingly."

Kylo took in a deep breath as he pintched the bridge of his nose. This was going to be a long day, he thought to himself. He took a deep breath before he replied calmly, "Pull your scouts. I have something else in mind."

"But-"

"That's an order general!" 

"Yes...sir."

He watched in frustration as Hux scrambled his way out of his chambers, hands slowly unclentching as soon as he was out the door. Kylo was beginning to grow impatient with the general, but he knew he needed his wisdom on military tactics that he himself lacked. He turned in his chair, reaching for his holo pad to figure out what he was going to do next.

*

Hux made his way out of the supreme leaders chambers as quickly as he could. There was an insistent blinking on his wrist com that gave him some sort of hope. He looked both ways before responding to the person who waited patiently on the other side of the com, "Follow through with the plan. It's high time Kylo Ren paid for his actions."< * 

Rey couldn't hold back a smile as she stepped into the open area where everyone was busy eating and chatting. The rich smokey smell of a campfire hit her senses before she saw the massive fire buring in the center of the gathering, fighting off the cold night air. She was just making her way into the crowd when she heard the familiar soft chime of Rose's voice call out,

"There she is!"

Her eyes landed on her small group of friends who were close to the fire, small glasses held in their hands. She approached them with ease, "Hey guys."

Finn's large frame bumped into her first as he excitedly handed her one of the two glasses he held in his hands while he excitedly exclaimed, "Here you've got to try this!"

She looked down into the glass as a bright blue liquid before she questioned, "What is it?"

She tried to hold back a laugh as the others looked at her with a sense of amusement. Finn pushed her arm as if rushing her to taste the strange liquid as he spoke, "Just try it!"

Dowing the whole conyents of the mug in one gulp, Rey quickly grimanced at the buring feeling the liquid left in her mouth as it made its way down into her stomatch. He nose scruntched up in disgust as she responded, "How can you stand this?"

An elbow jabbed her playfully as Poe spoke into her ear with a chuckle, "It's like his third one."

Finn, happily unaware yelled, "It gets better!"

The group busted up with laughter before Rey whispered to Rose, "Somehow I doubt that."

The whole group was caught up in their jokes and stories when Rey felt a strange tugging sensation through the force. Not now, please not now she thought to herself before she realized that this was a different feeling completely. Turning around, her eyes quickly locked on general Leia Organa who was perched on a stray log. Rey turned back around to her friend who were still too consumed in a story to sense her mild panick attack. She whispered to Poe, "I'll be right back."

He gave her a small nod as his eyes connected with the general. Rey left in a rush, coming to sit next to the general in a heap. Leia gave her a warm smile as she spoke, "Rey."

Rey couldn't stop herself before the words started pouring out of her mouth, "Leia, I- I'm sorry about today. The mission got over my head, I don't know what I was thinking."

The woman simply placed a gentle hand on her thigh before she soothed, "You can't save them all Rey, Luke knew what he was doing when he left. He trusted you - trusted that you would find a way without him."

Rey turned her eyes onto the regal woman before her as she questioned, "But how? I know I'm supposed to be a leader now but I can't help feeling like I don't know the frist thing about being a Jedi."

"You are more capable than you think, and wise beyond your years. You're not alone in this battle Rey. You have us, don't forget."

As she looked back into the kind woman's eyes she was startled to find the hurt, the pain, but also the confidence and peace. This woman had seen so much in her life, had lost so much, and here she was comforting a young inexperienced Jedi who was sure to ruin everything she had built. She made a vow to herself that she would make this woman proud, that she would do all she could to restore the resistance, restore the peace that the general had once created. Rey noded to her with a small smile as she replied, "Thank you general."

Deep brown eyes lit up lovingly as she spoke, "Of course. Now go have fun, you deserve it. And please, call me Leia!"

Rey gave the genral - no Leia - a wide smile before she hurried back to her friends who now reeked of alcohol and bonfire. 

She giggled as Finn slurred, "Rey come on!"

Poe ran out and grabbed her hand as he smung her around, trading her to Finn who spun her around similarily. He laughter filled the air and her friends danced around her in circles. She shouted over the loud music, "This is absolutely ridiculous!"

She accepted another small glass of the disgusting blue liquid polietly as she threw it back and continued to dance around with her friends. Finn responding to her statement, "Yeah, ridiculously fun!"

Poe burst out into laughter as Rey turned on him with wide eyes and asked, "How many of those did you say he had again?"

Intead of replying, Poe grabbed her hands and spun her around in a cirlce as she let out a small scream. She detatched herself from him quickly as her stomatch growled. As she ate, she grbbed another small glass and chugged it because why the hell not? She let the warmth of the fire and the pungent liquid fill up the loneliness deep within her as she filled her belly and watched her friends stumble around in drunk glee. 

*

As he wrote down his final report, he was suddenly hit by a strange sense of cheer and.. dizziness? He was stunned in place. No, that couldn't be right. Was she even aware she had opened up to the bond? That she was projecting? He let his pen drop to the ground as he stumbled to his bed, collapsing in a weird second hand drunken state. He propped himself up into a sitting position as he shook his head, running his hands through his hair as he focused. Something clicked as he was able to connect fully to the bond. He could see fire - a large fire by the looks of it - that was in the center of some sort of celebration. Faces passed in a blur until his eyes locked onto the haunting hazel ones that he handed seen in years. 

His breath hitched in his throat as he looked down at her face, her sharp, elegant face. She looked older, hair cascading down her back in soft curls. She was bundled in thick robs and a dark blue cowl as she looked into the fire, unaware of his sudden intrusion into her mind. However, the moment was feeting and only lasted a second more before he was harshly thrown from the bond yet again. 

The lingering warmth of the fire slowly died down as he stared forward where the girl, Rey, once stood. A chill ran up his spine as the bond froze between them, not a whisper seeping through. In a fit of rage, he kicked the chair that was neatly placed before him, and when that wasn't enough he picked it up and slammed it against the wall. She was nearly in his grasp, all he had to do was say her name. How foolish could he be! He could have found the location, the location they had been scrambling to find, and end this whole sharade. Dammit! 

Not that she would want to see me, he thought to himself. She made that very clear the last time they spoke, but he could still find her, couldn’t he?He had enough of a sense to feel how far away she was in comparison to himself. That, and Hux had said something about a possible base somewhere in the outer rim. All he had to do was find her. Find her, find the base, find your mo- the general and end this. End this whole damn thing. 

He quickly reached for his com and was surprisingly still in tact after his small rampage, "General Hux, meet me in hanger two."

The general replied as prompt as ever, "Yes.. Supreme Leader?"

He didn't waste time, it was now or never, "I need you to prepare my ship."

There was a loud sigh heard on the other end before the general began his usual rant, "We are in the middle of a war Ren. Is it really a good time to head on vacation now when we are so close to locating their base?"

He shot back with fire, "That's what I'm working on general. You'd be wise to recognize your place, we don't want another accident now, do we?"

Hux hesitated before replying in a clipped voice, "Of course not... sir."

"Good. Have my shuttle ready in five."

*

His head bobbed through the hallways as he hurried to the location that was agreed upon already. He was filled to the brim with pent up anger from his meeting with that spoiled brat of a man who miraculously managed to become the new supreme leader. He clenched and unclentched his hands just thinking about his pompous higher up. As he neared the corner, he all but ran into the young man who saluted immediately. Hux immpatiently demanded, "Do you have the information?"

The young boy looked aver his shoulder repeatedly before he nervously addressed him, "It was very hard to uncover sir. You know with the fire and all."

Hux motioned with his hand for him to carry on as he spoke, "Yes yes I know and you will be paid accordingly! Just show me what you've found!"

The boy handed him a file with shaky hands. He quickly snatched them from him and dug through the contents before a cynical smile grazed his lips and he muttered, "Yes, this is good. Very good. Com Ren, he'll want to be informed before he leaves."

The boy saluted one more time, "As you say sir."


	2. Let’s Run and Never Look Back

First Order Base:

He watched heedfully as the stoney general marchedhis way into the hanger bay. Head held high as he announced upon arrival, “Ren your craft is ready. Please be cautious this time, I don’t want to fish you out of some remote forest at some obscene hour again.”

He gave the pompous general a brief once over before striding past him to his shuttle. Halting just in front of the door, he smirked as he shot back over his shoulder, “Noted." 

The clack clack of army issued boots could be heard behind him as the accented voice broke the uncomfortable silence Ren had created, “Might I remind you there is a war going on. So none of your escape for weeks on end business.”

Turning on his heels, Kylo looked over the general once more. He was up to something and he knew it; he could tell by the way his eyes shifted lazily as if he knew something especially tantilizing. Kylo gave a short nod before standing up straight and responding, “I’ll try my best general. You are dismissed.”

The door slammed shut as soon as he had entered his craft and could finally think without that weasel of a general breathing down his neck. He let his eyes fall across the sleek interior of his small craft that he had been presented with when he first pledged himself to the first order. The sleek black silencer had been prepared quickly, everything polished and precise for his comfort. He tried not to get annoyed as his boots made the same annoying clack against the ground that Hux's boots had as he made his way the pilot's chair. Large gloved hands wrapped around the gears, pausing briefly as something caught his eye. Something that had been placed so subtely, it was a miracle he even recognized it to begin with. With a low growl, he wrapped his hand around the object and marched back down the ramp into the hanger once again. The distant bob of red could be seen freezing in the distance as his voice carried throughout the hanger bay, “Hux!”

The thin metal object practically burned in his palm as he worked it over once, twice, three times before the general managed to scury his way back to his ship. Kylo wasted no time as he force pushed the object back at the general who, to his disapointment, had quicker reflexes than he initialy expected. Realization quickly flooded over the general's features as Kylo snarls out, “If I needed a babysitter I would have hired a droid to accompany me.” 

His eyes shift to the general whose fists were clentched in a failed attempt at concealing his anger before he replied, “Of course-“

However, the general was effectively cut off by the familiar slam of Kylo's door in his face. 

"-Sir."

As the ship door slamed shut in front of him, Hux waited patiently for the craft to start up before he promptly fled the hanger with no time to spare. As soon as Ren was out of earshot, a river of obsenities flooded from him that would've surely gotten him put on detail if he didn't hold such an esteemed position in the First Order. 

Turning on his heels, he made his way back in the direction he was headed before he had been interrupted by Ren's little outburst. He weaved through the coridoor, effectively avoiding eyecontact with the officers who roamed the halls and eyed him suspiciously. He had made it halfway to his destination when his com blinked fervently with an incoming message. He intersected it quickly, not wanting to waste anymore time than he already had.

“TX-9167 please tell me we have signal on Ren?”

The mechanical voice of his intel chirpped back, “Yes sir, everything is in place. Would you like me to activate the tracking system?”

He let a sigh he didn't know he was holding in escape him before he responded to the officer waiting patiently on the other end, “Activate and prepare the lift for me. I have urgent business that needs my attention.”

The mechanical voice came back as chipper as ever, “Right away sir. Would you like me to continue with operation alpha zero?”

He waved a hand, “Proceed as planned.”

As he arrived to the small lift, he let his eyes scan the surrounding perimeter before he proceeded into the lift and shut down his com link. He couldn't have any interuptions where he was going, not now - this is too important to him. As the doors sealed shut before him, he slowly reached out for a small chrome panel on the wall and input a series of digits before carefully sealing it back up again. The elevator halted slightly before continuing on past the last floor indicated on the panel. When the doors shifted open again, he was instantly enveloped in the glossy blue hue of the room. His feet took a calculated stride forward until the lift doors shut and the once pleasant blue glow of the room shifted into an ominous darkness that left him with a chill running down his back. The dark aura of the room was only hightened by the presence of the crippled form that rested in a massive tank of thick blue gel in the center of the room. Clearing his throat, he cut through the silence,

“Supreme Leader. You’re looking ..... better.”

The crippled mess shifted his head slightly in order to take in the appearance of his visitor before he responded in a scratchy voice, “Hux, what have you brought me?”

He proceeded to inch closer to his master as he explained, “Ren has left the planet to do who knows what.”

A small smile - or what he imagined could suply as a smile - stretched across the marred face of the old supreme leader as he croaked, “He is distracted.... good.”

“He will pay for what he has done supreme leader, I swear it!”

Snoke waved him off as he spoke evenly in a hushed tone, “I’m time general, in time.”

He took this time to remove the envelope from his jacket and present it to the man as he managed, “It wasn’t easy but I finally have everything I need to bring him down and restore you to your proper place.”

“Hold off on that for now. I have something far more interesting in mind for young Solo.”

\--------------------------------------------------- 

Voss, Resistance Base:

Her head spun violently in a disarray of circles as she placed a shakey hand against a strangely shaped tree to keep herself from toppling flat onto her face. She was acostumed to this same feeling, but usually on a much lower scale. This felt like something else entirely and she couldn't seem to control it. She took in a large breath of the cool night air in attempts to ease the spinning in her head as she lessened her grip on the odd tree in front of her. A gentle hand was placed on the delicate skin between her shoulder blades, breaking her out of her trance. Her eyes shifted open as a soft whisper broke through, “Rey? Are you okay?”

She managed to pry herself away from the tree copletely as she straightened herself out and turned her head around to find the deep eyes of Poe staring down at her. Pushing off from the tree, she gave him a small nod as she began to explain, “Yeah, I just- something doesn’t feel right.”

His hands quickly reached out to steady her as she stumbled to regain her balance, feeling foolish that she should need help for something as simple as walking in the first place. A deep chuckle rumbled through Poe as he replied, “Well you did have a couple shots of Corillian rum." 

The glare she gave him must have been a nasty one because the dashing pilot's eyebrows shot up, followed by his hands in a sort of surrender as he offered, "Not that I'm judging you or anything."

She gave him a small smile before walking past him and towards what she assumed was the way she came from. His hand shot out once more as he pointed her in the opposite direction before taking her hand and dragging her alongside him. She remebered the first time Finn had reached for her hand. She hated it. The survivor in her told her that she didn't need anyone to help her when she could easily fend for herself, but apparently this was a warm gesture - or so that's what her friends had tried to explain to her.

She laughed at the memory before accepting Poe's hand and leading him in the right direction; away from the outcropping of foliage that she had stumbled into. They had managed to make it back to the middle of the celebration that was quickly dying down as people rushed about to find their posts. This only fuled her unease as they halted before the general. The pair shared a look before Rey's head snapped up in recognition, “Someone is approaching the planet.”

An odd silence fell around the remaining crowd as everyone scurried off in varrying directions. A deep voice broke through the air as a patrol officer spoke through the general's com that was neatly placed on her wrist, “General, we have a classified ship in orbit? Looks like First Order. Do we take it down?”

Poe and Rey shuffled closer to the general as she motioned for them to approach, a thin crease starting to make an appearance between her eyebrows as she listened to the device. Concern flooded into the general's words as she responded promptly, “No, hold your fire. They don't have a location on us, we destoryed the files already.”

The tugging inside of Rey only grew stronger the longer they stood in place. The sensation grew until the familiar tug gripped her, trying to pry its way in. Rey knew exactly what was happening. “Leia, it’s B- Kylo. I don’t know how he managed to but-"

Leia has her eyes trained on the ground as Rey let the words die on her lips. Of course the general would sense her own son's force signature, there was no need to explain. She was more worried about the pained look in the general's eyes as she looked down at the ground before mumbling a response, “He doesn’t know we are down here. We need a diversion if we want to remain hidden.”

Poe was first to make a move forward, carefully placing a hand on Leia's shoulder as he spoke up, “We can have a squadron up in five general. It’s ten to one. I think we can handle him.”

This wasn't going to be pretty. She could almost taste the conflict in the general as she thought over the best strategy for handling her son. Sure, Ben Solo wasn't the most upstanding man in the galaxy, but Rey could not bear to imagine what would become of him if Poe had his way. Not to mention what it would do to her if his constant presence ceased to exist entirely. She could still remeber the pain she had felt as she closed the door on him and cut him out. Before Leia could respond, Rey moved forward as if to match Poe, and straightened her posture before offering, "Or a single ship."

She watched as the muscles in Poe’s shoulders visibly tightened before he turned on her with wide eyes, "Rey, I don't know if that's the best idea.”

She positioned herself so she was standing between both Poe and the general as she spoke with a new air of confidence, “I can handle him. I’ll divert him to a nearby planet if I have to. I don't think he'll fire so willingly.”

When no response came, she set her eyes on Poe who seemed on the fence with the idea and then back to the general, who was still deep in thought. She tried once more, pleading with the force that she would agree, “General?"

With that, Leia’s head snapped up to Rey and looked her deep in the eyes before she raised her com to her lips and commanded, “Prepare her a craft and proceed as planned."

She then turned to face Rey, handing her a small circular device that blinked slowly with a fluorescent blue hue; similar to the one she gave her when she visited Luke on Ach-to, "Take this. If you need us, you know what to do. May the force be with you Rey.”

She squeezed the general's hand in gratitude before the woman turned away. Rey turned her attention to Poe who gave her a large approving smile before scooping her up into a large embrace, “Good luck Rey.”

As soon as they seperate, she gives him a gentle smile back before turning around and jogging to the makeshift hanger bay in the far east corner on the base. This was going to be a long night, she thought to herself. Her feet picked up their pace as she rushed to locate the Falcon. Before she could make it any further she heard Poe's voice yell out, "May the force be with you!"

—————————————————------------- 

Dead Space: Outer Rim

She fiddled with the controls nervously before she managed to stretch to her right and pull the craft into a steady hover over Voss. It took her a while to get used to the massive panel of contros on the ship, but over time, she managed to familiarize herself enough. Not that she ever needed to fly the craft much with all the time she spent alone on desolate planets - with an ocational visit from master Luke - to finnish her training. She brought herself back into reality as her transmission blinked with an incoming transmission. She snapped her head up to look out of the glass panel seperating herself from the dark horizon in front of her. His craft was the only one in orbit besides hers - a single black silencer. Taking a deep breath, she reached out and pushed down on the insistent button and spoke out staunchly, “Kylo.”

He was completely silent for a moment before he responded calmly, “Rey.”

She couldn't help but curse herself for how harshly she had addressed him, especially when he responded like that, but she could not turn back now. If she were to awknowledge his softness, his humanity, she would be too tempted to return. It was easier this way. Easier to see him as a monster. See him as Kylo Ren, not Ben Solo. She blinked before she regained her composure and responded, “What are you doing orbiting the outer rim? Don’t you have a throne to keep warm or officers to yell at?”

A muffled chuckle made its way through the transmission, effectively cutting her off from her tagent. Was he laughing at her? She had never heard him laugh before, had she? It was an oddly pleasant sound. This may be harder than she presumed. She brings her attention back to the com as he continues in a low voice, “Can we talk?”

“Isn’t that what we are doing?” She scoffs back.

His voice come out smoothly - soft and gentle as ever, “No, I mean really talk. There’s a nearby planet-“

She's not falling for this. Not again. She cuts him off before he can finnish, “What do you really want?”

He replies quickly an edge to his deep voice as he shouts, “Fan out!”

“Excuse me?” She questions in response to such an odd request. 

Muffled cursing is heard on the otherside of the com before he explains, “Fan out. There’s an incoming of X-Wings.”

Unbelievable, she thinks to herself. What was she thinking facing him in the dead of space with no back up, “I should have figured! You don’t take well to rejection, do you?”

She leans in as he responses, “Damnit! I knew Hux was up to something. Rey, I didn't dispatch any fighters. You need to follow me."

"Absolutely not." 

"Rey, I don't have time for this!" 

Thinking quickly she offers, “They know your ship! You need to come aboard mine if we want to avoid any mess."

His distaste is evident as he fires back, "Rey I'm not stepping onto that piece of sh-"

She cuts him off quickly before he can finnish his sentence, "- You wanted to talk? Then get over here and talk."

In a matter of seconds, the half growl half grumble of Kylo Ren shoots back, "Fine."

\--------------------------------------------------- 

It only takes a moment for him to make his way to the ship that he grew to despise over the years. She had no idea what a blow to him it was tht she insisted on flying his fathers old craft, but he wouldn't dare voice it to her. Not when it meant so much to her. He shifted in his seat as his shuttle shook under the pull from the Falcon. When the ships had successfully merged, he made his way through the hatch and up into his father's ship before punching a button to drop his craft back into space. Hopefully that would distract the incoming X-Wings long enough for them to make a speedy escape, but he doubted that very much.

Standing to his full height, he scanned the old ship with a strange sense of longing. This was his childhood, everything he left behind. No, this was not his life anymore. He left this years ago. This was everything he hated. The legacy, the expectations. Sure the memories aboard the ship had been pleasant, but there was also the reminder of who he was and what he was expected to do. He never imagined anyone would begin to understand the reasoning behind why he tried to hard to remove himself from his past. Shaking off the daunting deja vu, he made his way up towards the front of the ship where he could feel Rey's force signature bouncing with nervous energy. 

He tried not to let his excitement seep through as he crept closer and closer to her presence. Three years felt entirely too long for his liking. His heart ached as if he were watching her slam the door on him again. As he made his way into the cooridor, his dark eyes immediately locked onto her ever welcoming ones for the first time. His eyes took her in; small frame, sharp cheek bones, cascading waves of deep brown hair, and hazel eyes. She looks older, but not in a bad way. Inocent eyes were replaced with wise eyes. Childish features swapped with sharp features of a mature woman. She was absolutely breath taking. She was dressed in an elegant ensemble of light greens and dark blues. Classic Jedi style, but entirely flattering. He moved slowly - cautiously- as he approached her. Her arms were crossed in front of her and she spoke fiercely, a patch of blush spreading across her nose. 

“Follow me."

He gave her a knowing smirk as he watched her eyes take in his long hair and large frame before he shot back, “Good to see you too."

With that she quickly turned her back to his and he managed to shuffle uncomfortably behind her. The short trip to the pilot's chambers was uncomfortably silent until she spoke up, “We aren't clear until we lose those fighters and I’m certain aren't going to let us go without a fight. If we are going to do this thing, I'm going to need a co-pilot."

“Co-pilot?" He questioned.

She turned on him with a wide smile plastered on her face as she responded, “Now where did you say that planet was?"

\--------------------------------------—————— 

First Order Base: 

Hux had barely made it back to the bridge when a trooper confronted him urgently, "General we have eyes on the Supreme Leader. He appears to be heading towards another craft."

He shot his eyes over the soldier's shoulder breifly in attemptes to see the screen in front of them before he turned back to the soldier, "What craft?"

The soldier shuffled nervously before pointing to the screen and responding quietly, "It looks like the Millenium Falcon sir."

His arm pushed forward, effectively shoving the trooper to the side as he made his way up to the screen. His eyes locked on the scene before him, "Are you positive?"

"Yes sir."

He couldn't peel his eyes away from the screen. Ren's craft had attatched and dettatched from the old piece of junk ship that was the Millenium Falcon, his father's ship. The girl, he should have figured. He was filled with an odd sense of satisfaction at the aknowledgement of the weakness of the reclusive mess of a man that was Kylo Ren. A smile spread across his lips as he ordered, "Fire on those ships. Do not hesitate."

The officer next to him shuffled uncomfortably in fear as he protested, “But sir-“

His eyes hooded as he repeated again, “I said fire on those ships!”

\--------------------------------------————— 

The Millenium Falcon: 

She watched carefully as the large man next to her looked around the ship before staring down at his feet, lost in thought. She took a moment to take in his appearance, broad shoulders and taut musscles rippled underneath his layers of finely woven material. He was even larger than when she had seen him last; if that were even possible. Maybe he had more free time to train? The long length of his dark waves caught her attention as they now reached further onto the tops of his shoulders. His eye lashes fluttered as his gaze shifted slightly from one foot to the other. He was still deep in thought when she cleared her throat and interupted his little day dream, "Ben? The planet. Where is it?"

His head shot up before he ran a shaky hand through his long locks and grumbled out, "Fourteen parsecs to the right. Do you know how to fly this thing?"

She kept her eyes trained forward as she snapped back, "How do you think I got here?”

She took a beat to click her seatbelt into place before she continued, “You might want to buckle up supreme leader. The outer rim is a dangerous place.”

She tried to hold back a smile as she pronounced supreme leader in the poshest of accents she could manage. She was fairly certain his eyes rolled back as he buckled himself into the seat next to hers. In a matter of seconds, they were being actively hunted down by a parade of X-Wings. She worked quickly through the flips and switches, avoiding the shots fired and trying to find a clear place to make the jump.

Ben's voice came out quickly, "On your right!"

Her eyes locked onto the X-Wing as she shot back, "I know!"

The sound of a seatbelt unbuckling filled the chamber, followed by the insistent beep of the warning system as he stood to his feet. He turned his head towards her as he spoke out with a hint of irritation, "You need to lose them now or they will follow us through lightspeed."

She kept her eyes trained on what she was doing as she completely ignored him. She knew what to do, she just needed to find the right time to do it. He stood still as if waiting for a response before she could hear him march his way towards the back of the ship, "Where are you going?"

"Just keep them in range." Came his voice.

"Okay?"

She continued on her game of tag until he spoke up again, "Make a sharp left!"

The last X-Wing that had been tailing them closely was shot down quickly. Her head snapped to the back of the craft as Kylo’s voice rang out, "Now punch it to hyperspeed!”

—————————————————————— 

Outer Rim: 

Poe watched in horror as the Millenium Falcon blasted into lightspeed and dissapeared out of sight. She made the jump. Or maybe he made the jump for her? Either way, he had to do something to get her back. Get her away from that monster. His hand shot to the bright red button blinking to his left and began, "General, we lost contact."

The worried voice of the general came through, "What happened?"

"She went into hyperspeed."

Leia hesitated before she questioned, "Do you have eyes on... Kylo Ren?"

"He fled with her."

"Pull back Dameron."

What? Pull back? Was she really considering abandoning Rey when she was with that man? He shook his head as he remebered Rey was a Jedi who was more than capable of protecting herself from the general's estranged son, but he couldn't help but worry for her well being. He had grown acostumed to her presence the last few years. They had managed to get themselves out of the strangest and most peculiar situation in battle together and he would be lying if he wasn't captured by her. She was stunning, breath taking really, but far too independent for the likes of any man. Still he had to try, “But I could get to her I just have to-“

The general's voice came back as firm as ever as she commanded, “I said pull back Dameron, this one isn’t up for debate!”

He let a sigh out as he flipped a couple switches and piloted his craft back to base, “Yes mam.”


	3. There’s a Storm Afoot

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello my friends, I hope you enjoy this new chapter! I appreciate all the love and support you guys have shown for this story so far and I can’t wait to continue this journey :)

The ship was gaining more speed than she expected as they entered the planets atmosphere. She tried to ignore the sudden drop in temperature as her eyes scanned the crystaline blues and icy whites of the planet below. However, her attention to detail was quickly overted as the warning system blarred through the ship and her muscles strained to keep the craft at a desirable level. She could practically feel the panic in Ben start to bubble over as she dodged a snow covered tree and he growled out, 

“Pull up!”

Her palms began to swet and her stomatch filled with a strange sense of nervousness that she normally avoided while flying as she tightened her grip on the controls and pushed her already taut muscles past their limit. Gritting her teeth she shouted back at her impatient co-pilot who didn't seem to be helping much, 

“I am!”

She knew what she was doing and she sure as hell didn’t need him telling her what to do. Like he was some expert pilot or something? The nerve of that man, she thought to herself. She had been pulling up as hard as she could the past five minutes and could only withstand this level of exersion for a few more seconds before her arms completely fell out of their sockets. The pain had been sharp, but not unbearable. Surely she had been through far worse than this and survived. Maybe it was the added pressure of Ben in the cockpit that was getting to her. It took her a moment to realize that he had moved out of his seat and flipped a switch before he made his way over to her. She eyed him up and down from the corner of her eye as she managed to grunt out,

“What do you think you’re-“

She tried not to flinch as his arms reached under hers and pulled the steering mechanism up with such ease she felt embarassed at how badly she had struggled with it before. His body gave off a warm heat as he crowched behind her. A strangely masculine cough came from him before he quickly extracted his arms out from under hers and strolled back to his seat mumbling alog the way, 

“There." 

She kept her eyes forward as she felt her cheecks grow warm with embarasment. For a brief second - the breifest of seconds - she allowed her eyes flit over to him before locking back on the landscape in front of her. The moment passed in silence before he spoke up again in a clear comanding voice, almost as if he were leading one of his men into battle, 

"Now, there should be an opening you can land to the right. Please try you're best not to kill us.”

She rolled her eyes at his ending emark, but carried on with his instructions and found the open clearing he mentioned with ease. Her hands flipped and flicked at a series of switches as she eased the craft down onto the stark white surface with as much grace as one could manage while landing a massive space craft. She felt the familiar jolt of touch down and remained still as the man to her right unfastened his safety belt and made his way down the corridoor, his boots making a rather amusing clack against the metal grates of the floor. Without further delay, she stood to her feet and followed after him at a steady pace. 

She let her eyes gloss over his massive form before she deftly inched her hand - that had hung loosely to her side - brush against the cold metal cylinder that was attatched securely to her hip before grasping it more firmly in her palm. The weight of the weapon in her hand seemed heavier than usual as her thumb slid down to ignight the blade. Her arm moved fluidly into a defensive position as if she had done it a thousand times before, illuminating the pale snow in a everescent blue glow. 

As soon as the sound penetrated the air arroud them, the man before her turned quickly, his hand darting to his own cleaverly modified weapon. However, his angry red blade never came. Instead, his eyes filled with something akin to admiration as he locked his gaze onto the long weapon in her hands. He let a curious smirk play on his lips as he moved in closer as if to get a better view, “You modified it. Double blade.”

His slick black boots made an unsettling crunch against the icy ground as he stepped even closer to her, unphased by the threat that she posed. His eyes lingered on the weapon one last time before his dark eyed met hers and he whispered in that same gentle tone she remebered so well, “It suits you.”

A shutter ran through her at the tenderness in which he addressed her, reminding her so much of their intimate incounter years ago in the elevator as she tried desperately to convince him to change his course. She thought she had him then, she almost forgot she didn't have him now. The nostaligia of the time passed almost tore her heart out of her chest all over again, but she would not admit how shaken she truely was by his affection. Her grip on her lightsaber did not waver as she found her voice again, 

“Why should I trust you? Last time I trusted you I ended up handcuffed and tortured by your master.”

His face shifted abrubtly into something far, something so closed off she wondered if he were the same man. She was stunned with the ease in which he closed people off; as if he had grown so acostumed to that task that he was able to flip so easily. His face remained firmly closed off, as if he were reliving the event before he let his features soften once again. His voiced filled with emotion as he addressed her, 

“Because I’m trusting you Rey. I killed Snoke, and you didn't think twice about turning on me in the end. I was the one who woke up alone.”

She lowered her weapon an inch before lowering it completely and clipping it back to her belt leaving the two in a menacing darkness as she clutched her arms around herself. The icy breeze of the planet quickly becoming more notibacle as she responded with a chatter of her teeth, 

“I had to. I had no other choice.”

He took the oportunity to more closer in order to get a better look at her face which had been shadowed by the twilight. The fine ice on the ground beneath them gave a strange glow to his eyes as he expressed with more passion than she had ever seen him hold before, 

“Why? Tell me Rey, did you reject my offer because you knew it was wrong or because you were too scared to admit how right it truly felt? As much as you try to deny it, to forget, you know what you saw; We both saw it. One of us could be wrong, but there is one constant.”

Her head turned swiftly to the side, as if she were trying to push his words away. She didn't want to hear it - not now. If she ignored it, she knew it wouldn't come true; or at least she wouldn't have to face the truth. She felt her eyes close tight as she pleaded, “Stop-”

He didn't give her any leadway as he continued on past her protests, his body closing in on her until he was practically toe to toe with her, “-You and I together.”

A calmness swept through the air around them - a calmness she would not typically equate with her encounters with him - as he reched out and brushed his hand against her cheeck ever so softly. It felt as if the force had swept them into this bubble and for some reason it was pleased. He did not continue until her eyes opened and met his. She felt smaller than usual under his gaze as he spoke. like she was the young child from Jakku again.

“We are going to be in each others lives whether we want to or not and the sooner you accept that, the sooner you become who you were meant to be.”

Where she was once filled with tender affection, she was now filled with alam. His voice had changed into something possesive, something that sent chills up her spine. She straightened herself before turning around and walking away from his intense gaze. The anger was building around her, and the force was no longer meshing their signatures together as she spat back, “I already know who I am!”

The almosy mystical reflection from the ice in his eyes was gone now. His eyes were dark and his posture just as rigid. This was not the Ben Solo she knew. This was Kylo Ren, the cruel leader of the Firt Order. His tone was just as cruel as he responded to her firey outburt.

“Do you? Or are you still worried about the past? Your parents were horrible people who didn't want anything to do with you. You were practically the fodder beneath their feet!“

She was shaking now. Later she would blame the cold, but the wetness in her eyes was undeniable. Her tears froze as they spilled oonto her flushed cheeks. He stopped dead in his rant, his expression full of realization as he let his breathing slow down. He took a step forwward as he whispered softly, “And you’re scared you’re going to become like them-“

She hurried to scrub the tears from her face before she cut him off. She didn't want him to continue. She was done with that, with her lonliness and longing. She had put it aside and he was just being an ass and bringing it up again. Her face scruntched up into an expression of anger as she shot at him, 

“And you’re one to talk! You go about killing everyone you love because you’re still too scared to admit that you don't have it in you to face them, to face your own mother!”

His hand quickly shot up as if he were trying to force push the words away as he growled, "I don't want to talk about my- that woman."

“Well then grow the hell up Ben! You're going to have to someday whether you want to or not!" She didn't know where it came from, but she did not regret it one bit. 

She could see their breath make clouds around them as they stood facing eachother. She could have sworn she could see the pain in his eyes before he turned around and grabbed a black bag and stormed off. He was headed away from the ship, away from their food and warmth. She should just take off, run far away from him, but the words spilled from her before she could stop them,

"Where are you going?”

She followed after him as he shouted back over his shoulder, “To find some cover! There's a storm coming and that thing isn't going to offer us any protection.”

*

By the time Poe had made it back to the general's quarters, she was already pacing and talking quickly into a comm. He knocked on the door that was already open to get her attention before walking in. He eyes were wide and she spoke in her usual clipped voice, “Dameron, you..... actually listened to me for once.”

He waved her off before making his way to the screen on her desk and tapping it nervously, “I don't care to be on your bad side again. Has Rey made contact yet?”

Leia let out a sigh before she responded, “No signal yet.”

His hands stopped their task on her screen before they began to shake. He was flooded with emotions he was usually very carefull enough to keep in check, but he could'nt stop himself from kicking the chair next tot him as he cursed, “Dammit, I can’t just sit here and wait! I'm not like you, I-I have to do something!”

Leia gave him a stern look - clearly displeaded with his outburst involving her favorite chair -before she doned an almost maternal expression and motioned for him to take a seat in the only other chair in the room as she advised, “I know, I know. Look, if she doesn’t make contact in the next 24 hours we’ll send a team.”

“Okay.....yeah..... okay.” 

He took a seat and tried to calm his breathing. Leia didn't need to see him like this, she didn't deserve to have to deal with his outbursts. Surely she had delt with enough in her days, being the mother of Kylo Ren and all. He still couldn't believe the kind woman in front of him birthed such a cruel and manipulative dictator. She moved as gracefully as ever as she came to face him. Her hand brushed his shoulder as she offered tenderly, 

“We’ll get her back, don’t you worry.”

“I sure hope so.”

The general moved back behind her desk before she continued, "For now, why don't you go help Finn and Rose out with that old X-Wing in the hanger?"

Standing up, he made a move to let himself out before turning around and giving the general a small smile and whispering, "Thank you general."

She gave him a kind nod before getting back to work and he decided to take up her offer and talk with some friends. Maybe the would get his mind off of Rey and the torture she was surely going through at the hands of that man. 

*

They had been walking for what felt like hours now and Rey was beginning to think this was a strange plot to get rid of her. If it was, she would accept it generously, as long as it meant she would be warm and full of food. She knew he was mad and needed to cool down, but there was no way he was still upset, at least not when they were nearly frozen to death. The silence continued to grow before she couldn't take it anymore, “Do you know where you’re going?”

He continued on as if he hadn't heard a word she said, so she tried again, “Ben?”

His hand shot up to quiet her before he turned and comically raised a finger to his lips, “Shhh. This way.”

She followed behind him once again before he turned around and she practically fell onto him. He had a serious look on his face as he held out a thickly woven black cowl to her, "Here."

She looked at the cowl and then back up to him and then the cowl again as if asking what he wanted her to do with it. He was trying hard not to roll his eyes as he offered, "Take it."

If he was going to be closed off, so was she. Two could play at that game. She crossed her arms across her chest before responding, "I think I'll manage."

He wasn't going to take no for an answer. He shifted the cowl in his hands and placed it around her shoulders as he explained, "Your body isn't acclimated to the temperature of this planet. Can't have you dying on me yet."

With that done and out of the way, they welcomed the silence back up as they continued on their way to who knows where. Although the silence was no longer uncomfortable and charged with hostility, instead it was oddly comfortable. She was only relieved that she wasn't completely frozen now, wrapped in Ben's cowl that was more like a top on her. As they crept along, she let out a sigh of relief as they finally approached what appeared to be a village. People were hurrying about the village with stacks of food and supplies in their arms as they made their way into their huts. 

She watched from the side as Ben approached a man and began talking in a strange foreign dialect she was unfamiliar with. Part of her wondered if C-3PO was to creit for his seemingly vast repertoire of languages. Either that, or general Leia had insisted on it when he was a child. She could just picture the small boy with dark locks protesting against such a chore as his mother tried to persuade him with treats. She lets a small smile play on her lips at the imagery before his deep voice cut through the air and her daydream faded,

“He said there's an open hut towards the edge of their camp and we are welcome to stay through the storm. It's going to be a nasty one."

She looks up at him with a new found admiration. No matter how hard he tried to deny it, he was his mother's son. Down to his emotional shield and the stubborn way he carried himself. She almost forgot that he had been addressing her when he gave her a confused look and asked, "What?"

Shaking her head, she motioned with her hand as she responded, "Nothing, lead the way."

*

Hux stood firmly on the bridge as he reviewed their plan of attack on his device before he was interrupted by a soldier, "Sir."

He turned on him immediately, shutting down his device as he questioned, "Do we have Ren's location?"

The man before him seemed nervous, as usual, but spoke in a clear voice, 

"It appears so sir. He has managed to retreat to a nearby outer rim planet with the girl."

A girl? This would be far more productive than he initially hoped. Supreme leader's prophecy were slowly coming into place and he was loving every minute of it. The sooner he saw Kylo Ren crushed like a bug beneath his boot, the closer he would be to achieving everything he sought to achieve. It was only time before that emotional mess of a man crumpled under the pressure. It was just a bonus that the girl was the one to ignight the initial flame. 

"The scavenger? Perfect! Two for the price of one. We'll be able to take them both out.... that is, if they don't kill eachother first."

Before the soldier could turn back around, he continued on, "Make sure the bounty is well known in that region and please make it clear they are to fire on sight."

"Are you positive sir?" The man shuffled his feet and looked down. 

"Supreme leader has made it perfectly clear. You wouldn't wish to go against the Supreme Leader's orders now would you?"

"No sir. I will proceed as requested."

"Good."

*

The abandon hut had far more appeal to it that Rey would have expected from Ben's explanation. She smiles as she stepped into the thickly wooden building and took in the large domed ceiling. Strings of lights hung from the rich mahogany wood like stars in the sky. The hut itself was spacious and offered a large cot in the middle of the roomthat was drapped in a rich green comforter and matching pillows. As she crept closer, her fingers dared to brush a thickly woven blanket that lay across the end of the bed in a deep saphire. To the side, the hut opened up into another room which she assumed was the kitchen and then another door to the back that has a curtain drawn in front of a door frame in the same emerald color as the comforter. She spun to look at every corner before she found her voice again

“This is beautiful."

She watched a Kylo stood in front of the door that was no securly latched as he shrugged and confessed, "I would say small, but I guess it does have some.... character."

The two stood awkwardly in the center of the room before she cleared her throat and slid the black cowl off of her shoulders in one fluid motion. She bunched the warm fabric up in her bare hands, letting the rough texture brush her palms before she offered it back to the man in front of her, "Thank you."

His eyes shifted from her eyes to the mass of black fabric in her hands before he reached out carefully and accepted his cowl back with a nod, "Yeah."

He gave her one final glance before turning and making his way for the other room, "I'm going to look around for some supplies. You take the cot."

Her brows furrowed intensely as she reacted to what he was offering, "What? No."

Ben turned back around, his arms crossing sternly across his broad chest as he spoke softly, "Take the cot, it'll be warmer than the floor. You're body is sensitive to the cold anyways."

"I can take the floor, I'm used to it." She insisted.

A quizical look spread across his face, his eyebrows raising hurmerously as he asked, "You sleep on the floor?"

She gave him a similar look of confusion before she stumbled to explain herself, "Yes - I mean - no, not anymore."

"Take the cot Rey." He spoke calmly before turning around again and making his way into the adjacent room. Before he was too far away, he shot back, "I think my feet would dangle off anyways." 

A small smile spread across her lips before she started to make up the cot. The deep green comforter was softer than she presumed and filled with some kind of fluff for added warmth. The room itself was way more than she expected. Filled with deep earthy colors and small green plants in decorative clay pots. She didn't take her eyes off of the beautiful tapestry and greenery until Ben reappeared in the room holding another soft cream colored blanket in his hands

"Here take this, it get cold at night and this storm is just going to make it worse."

She accepted it silently, placing it on the cot that was stacked high with blankets and pillows. Her gaze turned back to him as she took a seat on the cot. He was folding blankets together and making up a place for himself on the floor before he moved to a small fireplace. She watched the muscles in his shoulders ripple as he moved about the small space, successfully lighting a fire. She could have swore he could feel her eyes on him because he tried to make conversation as he finnished up his curreent task

"There are some ration bars on the table in the other room if you get hungry."

She decided it was probably best to make herself comfortable in the cot underneath her instead - the food would only last them so long. She was securely wrapped up in a sea of blankets when Ben spoke again

"Goodnight Rey."

She let the silence creep up again, fairly certain he had fallen asleep before she dared to ask, "Ben?"

There was a mumbled 'hmm' from him before she continued on, "I'm sorry about earlier I was just-"

He cut her off before she could finish, "Don't worry about it. I get it, I pushed you. I should have known you'd push back. It's fine."

Nodding her head, she broach the sheet further up around her face as she whispered, 

"Okay."

*

"So, you just let her get away? What's wrong with you" 

Rose looked up at him from her spot underneath the old warped X-Wing. She dusted herself off before getting up and facing him with her hands on her hips as if he had comitted an unforgivable crime. Poe raised his hands up in surrender as he explained, 

"I didn't really have a choice. You remeber what happened last time I crossed Leia."

He tried not to laugh as he watched the small woman do a double take before she went off on a tangent, "Yeah I get that, but when did you ever listen to anyone? You're Poe Dameron, nobody expects you to just sit and wait! You're a doer, so go do! "

Poe's response was cut off as Finn's voice cut through the air, "What's Poe doing now?"

Rose practically skipped over to Finn as she drapped an arm around his shoulders and exclaimed, "He's going to go get his lady back."

Finn's eyebrows raised at him before his expression turned more serious. Something seemed to strike him - probably realization - before he began questioning, "Rey? What happened? The mission bombed? Why haven't I heard anything yet?"

Poe made his way to his friend, taking his place on the opposite side of Rose and drapping his arm around him in a similar fashion to her as he explained, "Sorry buddy, the general is keeping it under wraps. If people knew our secret weapon was missing it would raise some heads and quite possibly some blasters."

Finn shook both of them off as he turned on them, 

"Okay, but what the hell happened?"

Poe crossed his arms over his chest as he let out a deep sigh before responding to his very upset friend, "Kylo Ren happened."

"How? Does that guy ever take a day off?" Finn continued on his outburst, he absolutely hated that guy. Well, come to think of it, so did Poe but it was rather amusing to see Finn get so worked up over the general's estranged son. 

The two were almost too distracted to hear Rose, "Uh guys?"

"I mean seriously man he-"

She tried again to get their attention, this time more forcefull, "Guys!"

When the two men trained their eyes on her, she continued, holding up a tablet that was opened to the holonet, "You might want to see this."

Bothe men crouched around the device, their eyes going wide before Finn exclaimed, 

"You've got to be kidding me!"


	4. Bounty Smounty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello friends! Thank you SO much for all the kind support, it is GREATLY appreciated! Sorry this chapter is a tad short and there’s not bunch of Rey and Kylo, but I promise there’s SOOO much more coming for those two, and for the others, but especially those two! Anywho, thank you so much and please enjoy!

Rebel Base:

His eyes watched the projected video replay again and again on the device, not believing what he was seeing. The distinctive blue blade passed through Snoke with ease and flew back to Rey’s hand in one quick motion. However, this isn’t what surprised him, not at all. What surprised him more was the face of Kylo Ren looking down on her as he ignited his own weapon and began to fight off Snoke’s elite guards. 

He did it. He really killed the supreme leader. Poe never believed the man had it in him, but now he feared for Rey tenfold. This man was a lethal war machine who was some what of a wild card, acting on emotion most of the time. Poe let his eyes gloss over the projected portraits - rather mug shots - of both Rey and Kylo Ren before he turned on his heels and made his way out of the hanger. He ignored the worried shouts of Finn and Rose as he stormed away. He had to get out of there, he had to tell the general. The general? Did she already know? Maybe this is what she was hiding from him. 

He couldn’t help the way his fists balled up and his heart rate picked up as he proceeded on his route. Poe Dameron was furious. Check that, he was beyond furious as he stomped his way back to the general's office. His usual lax and jovial demenar had vanished, replaced by something priml and protective as he thought of the kind hazel eyes that he was growing so fond of. People shot him confused glances as they hurried out of his way. When he finally reached the general's office, he didn't lend himself the courtesy of knocking, - no, not today - instead he pushed his way through making his presence know as he challenged,

"Did you know about this?"

Leia's tawny eyes shot him a bewildered look as he slammed the data pad on her desk in front of her. She gave him a final warning glare before her delicate hands picked up the device. Her eyes scanned the video and then the displayed pictures of Rey and ..... her son - her Ben. Her son was no longer the thirteen year old boy she kissed goodbye when she hesitantly sent him off to train with Luke. He was a man. 

She tried to shield the emotion on her face as she scanned over his dark eyes and long wavy hair. Her eyes roamed over the long scar across his face that seemed to disrupt his gentle features and give him a more menacing appearance. His long nose and soft jaw reminded her so much of the man she fell in love with years ago. He was like his father in so many ways, even if he demanded he wasn't. Without another second to spare, she set the device back down with a depelted sigh, the holo projection of her son’s face haunting her as she responded to the anxious pilot,

"I knew about the bounty on their heads, but given your track record and recent state of mind concerning Rey, I didn't think it would be wise to inform you."

"She has a bounty on her head!" 

Poe shot back almost in disbelief at the woman in front of him. How could she possibly say these things. Did she even care what happened to Rey? To the fate of the galaxy if she were to die. This would shift the tide completely, and for some reason she didn't seem all to worried. That's a lot of faith to put in one person. Not that he doubted Rey's strength or determination, but he was more worried about her state of mind and the company that she was with. 

He watched as Leia's warm eyes softened as she set her gaze on him once again. She gave him a look of understanding, but her eyes wouldn't hold his for longer than necessary, almost as if she were still concealing a dire secret from him. He crossed his arms in front of him and raised his eyebrows as if giving her the opportunity of explain herself and the logic behind her decision. The general spoke softly, but with power and authority, 

"And we still don't have a location on her. We can't risk sending out a fleet into open space and expect them to agree to going on a man hunt, even if she is an important member of this team. Rey is capable of taking care of herself. There's a reason she hasn't sent the signal out yet."

He threw his hands in the air before raising his voice, "And what if she is in serious danger?"

Leia stood up behind her desk, bringing attention to herself, and more effectively her status as the head of this operation. Poe knew his place, but sometimes he needed to be reminded. He was far too comfortable voicing his opinion that sometimes he forgot it wasn't neccessarily up for debate. 

"I know your .... affection for Rey has grown recently, we are all quite fond of her, but all we can do now is wait and trust that she is safe. She's excellent at keeping a low profile if you don't remeber."

He nodded his head once, accepting the subliminal message that Leia was shoving at him - He's out of place. He knew when to step down, and now was the time to do so. With one last fleeting glance, he made his way back to the hanger to his friends. His movements were defeated and slow, but who could blame him. He only longed to hear the sweetly accented voice of his friend - his Rey - again. That would be music to his ears at the moment, but for now he had to accept things how they were. Or maybe? No - that's foolish, but maybe it could work, he thought to himself. He let the thought linger around in his head as he quickened his pace, needing a second opinion - or quite possibly a third. 

*

As soon as Dameron had exited her office, Leia made her way to close the sturdy door and lock it in place before she dared look at the device she had concealed. Her eyes lingered on the holo projection of her son , grown up and uniquely handsome, as she reached for the small silver key in a pull out drawer. Bringing the key to the compartment on her desk, she twisted once to the left before it sprung open. In the compartment was a small picture frame, a strand of dark fabric, a gleaming violet crystal, and a comunication device. Her hands grasped for the communication device that she clicked on, hoping there was a message waiting to be revealed. She practically gasped when there was a blink of red, indicating a new message had been recieved. She read it carefully, 

>I am safe. We have managed to land the Falcon on a nearby outerrim planet. I'm not familiar with the planet, but it is quite cold and snowy. There is a storm planet side so we had to find shelter, but I promise you I am safe; we both are. It seems unlikely that he will attack, more so that I may attack him out of irritation, but I promise I will try my best to remain a level head. I will bring him back to you Leia. Rey.<

She held the device close to her hear before she allowed the tears to fall down her face. Something was coming, something she could sense within the force surrounding Rey. She trusted the girl, but something had changed. There was a seed that had been planted and she didn't know if she could help much. She only hoped she was right about her son and his affinity for Rey. 

*

Outer Rim:

“No please.”

He had finally managed to fall into a light sleep when the sound of Rey's voice urged him out of his light slumber. She was mumbling incoherently, bunching up the blanket around her on the bed. He sat up in her makeshift bed as he softly questioned, “Rey?”

Her words were louder this time, and he could make out worry and fear in her voice as her throat tightened around the words, “Don’t do this.”

He shot up, making his way around to the side of the bed where Rey rest. He crouched to get a better look at her face through the dimly lit room, candles flickering around them. His eyes caught the glare of something wet on her face, tears. The water streamed from her eyes, giving her an inocent expression, something he wouldn't typically associate with her. His expression softened as he remebered the tears she cried on the finalizer years ago. She was a strong person, stronger than he even knew, but the site of her crying never ceased to frighten him. He stood still a moment longer before he whispered, “Rey.”

She rolled onto her side, facing him as she shouted back - more like sobbed back- in her dream, “Take me instead!”

He carefully wiped the tears streaming down her face before wrapping his arms around her shoulders and shaking lightly, “Rey!”

Her hazel eyes flew open quickly as she let out a gasp, frantically searching for something before her eyes locked onto him. Her eyes softened considerably as she reached out to place a hand on his face as she asked,

“Ben?”

He tried not to flinch away from her hand as he looked back at her in shock. He spoke with a gentleness that even surprised himself, “Yeah, are you alright?”

When she didn’t say anything he continued on as if he didn’t see the realization on her face and the way she moved to wipe the tear residue from her face, “I think you were dreaming.”

Her mood changed drastically from one of soft compassion and longing to one of reservation and doubt. She sat up not, bring the blankets around her protectively as she responded, "I’m fine, sorry I woke you up.”

She was scared. That much he could tell as he watched her try to quell the shaking of her hands. He looked down at her skeptically raising an eyebrow as he pointed out, “You’re shaking.”

He made a move to touch her shoulder again, but he felt a wave of embarrassment hit her before she closed off their bond completely again. She brushed him of as she turned around and snuggled into the cot again. 

“It’s bloody cold Ben. I’m going back to sleep. You should too.”

“Yeah. Okay.”

With that he moved back to his place and payed down. Not that either of them were going to sleep much after that. He stared at the domed ceiling until the sun began to rise.

*  
First Order Base: 

Once he was sure the incompetent guards had successfully delivered the bounty to the outer rim planet and beyond, Hux smugly made his way down to the quote and quote basement of the first order base. As he entered, he did not wait to address the man before him. 

“Supreme Leader, all is going according to your plan. The bounty is set and soon Ren will be disposed of and the girl will be yours.”

Snoke made a move of his surprisingly regenerated hand as he spoke as nonchalantly as he could, 

“Spare the boy.”

Hux couldn’t help the way he gawked at the Supreme Leader completely speakeasy before he finally managed to choke out, “Excuse me?”

He waved him off once again as if it were nothing but old news to him, “Spare him. I will need him if we are to get to the girl.”

“I thought you said she was finally in your grasp.” Hux pronounced, trying hard to keep the anger at his voice as he spoke to the supreme leader. 

“Oh she is. But it appears she has more of an.... affinity for my apprentice than I presumed. If we are to get to her, we must get to him. Preferably by my hand.”

Hux shot his eyebrows up in surprise. He had known of Ren's sort of obsession with the scavenger, but he always presumed it was because he wished to destroy someone who could best him. Maybe he was more surprised that Ren might actually have a heart under all those layers of black. Clearing his face of emotion, he questioned, 

“Ren perishes at your hand and then what of the girl?”

“She will be so grieved over the loss of her force bound partner that she will have nowhere else to put her energy but in the darkness. The action itself will break her. I have foreseen great distruction and misery by her hand. She will bring an end to the republic.” Snoke explained meniachally. 

“She has cost us enough already.” 

Hux mumbled under his breath before he spoke up to his master, noticing the appearance of his skin, “I see the operation worked.”

He watched carefully as the man before him stood and stretched his now smoth hands. Where he was once a wrinkled mess, he was now a rather normal looking human being, save for his imaculate size and height. He looked more healthy than Hux had even seen, and he wasn't about to question how he managed to make such a ... recovey.

Snoke spoke as he moved his newly healed limbs. 

“Yes. Soon I will be restored to my proper being and all will be right. As long as you bring them to me.”

“Yes master.” 

*

Rebel Base: 

As soon as Poe entered back into the hanger, he was bombarded by bothe Finn and Rose. Before he could get a word in, Rose spoke up curiosity and worry seeping into her voice as she jabbed at him, 

"What happened? Did you find anything out about Rey?"

"No. She hasn't made communication with us yet."

He tried to hold back his amusement as both Finn and Rose gave eachother a look, passing something non verbal, before they exclaimed at the same time, 

"What?"

There was a beat of silence before Finn pushed forward and asked, 

"She's not in trouble is she?"

He let his eyes scan over Finn. He had benefitted greatly from his time in the resistance. He was stronger, healthier, even happier, but he never lost his passion for his friends. Sure, he loved Rose, but he would always share something akin to a sibling relationship with rey -she was family to them by all means, and they weren't just going to sit here knowing that she could possibly be in danger. Poe let out a sight as he responded, 

"I'm not sure."

Rose stepped up next, he petite size rather comival compared to her firey attitude. She had her hands placed on her hips like a chastizing mother as she almost demanded, 

"Well what did Leia say?"

Poe sat back in a stray chair that was cold and stiff as he kicked back his legs, crossing them in front of him as she spoke, "She said to trust Rey and her words"

"But?" Rose began as she moved in front of Poe before she continued, "I sense a but coming."

Poe took a seat, looking over the pair once before he managed to choke out what had come to him on his way towards the hanger, "But, I don't think the general is telling the whole truth still. She know something, but is with holding for whatever reason. She stated that it had to do with my feelings, but that a bunch of whooey."

Finn came to stand in front of Poe, his arms crossed in front of his chest as he quipped, "So what's the plan?"

He gave the couple a michivous smirk as he responded, "I'm glad you asked!"


	5. Sweet Dreams

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello friends! Thank you for all the support so far! Hope you enjoy this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it!

Outer Rim:

Ben could feel the crisp warmth of the sun against his the hairs on the back of his neck as he wandered through the thick thatch of lengthy green foliage he was currently encased in. As he came to the end of the thick maze, he carefully brought his hands up to push aside the last curtain of emerald greenery before he emerged from the tall grass and into an excluded meadow that was filled to the brim with bright indigo and stark white flowers. Slowly making his way through the meadow, he took a moment to crouch down and brush the tips of his fingers across the delicate sea of petals. Bright purple and white mixed together in a dust, flowing though the air similar to the way the fog rolled in over a body of water early in the morning.

The deep indigo petals stained his fingers tips, but he simply brushed it off on his black trousers, letting a smile grace his lips as he reminisced in the sea of color. The flowers reminded him of the woman he had often dreamed of. A woman surrounded by flowers - ethereal really, in every sense. She was bathed in deep midnight colors and often whispered encouraging words into his ears. 

Grandma. 

He smiled as he pucked a single dainty flower from the earth and twisted it between his fingers till it spun like a top.

His eyes stayed transfixed by the tiny flower until melodious laughter filled the air, breaking him from his daydream. Sweet laughter surrounded him like a warm embrace or a gentle kiss. Sweet and tender. His feet were moving before he could process where he was being carried. The delicious laughter came closer and closer as he neared a small pond. He felt intoxicated, like the very sound of the distinctly female voice were a drug. 

His feet cane to an abrupt halt as he fixed his eyes on a woman standing ankle deep in a small pound that was surrounded by the same indigo and white flowers. He let the flower he had been fiddling with earlier fall from his hand as he met the gentle hazel eyes of a woman. 

Rey. 

She was bathed in white light. An almost angelic light eliminating her face as it reflected off of the simple white shift she wore. The demure white flowers laced around her head like a halo. She was breathtaking. In fact, he had to take a moment to catch his breath as he looked upon her. He couldn’t fight the smile that crept up onto his face as her smile grew even wider upon his arrival. He watched is bemusement as she cupped her hands in the water, gathering it up before tossing it towards his face. 

Ben awoke quickly, looking around the room as he felt the water meet his face, Rey’s melodious laughter still echoing in his mind. He took a deep breath before looking up to the ceiling. He was met with another drop of water as it fell from the domed roof and onto his brow, dripping down the side of his face. Wiping it away, he made a move to get up and get something to capture the cold water leaking from the ceiling before he was completely drenched in the cold rain water.

As he gathered up his makeshift bed, his eyes waundered to the cot in the middle of the room that was now empty. His eyes narrowed in focus, as if the small woman would roll out of the heap of blanket skattered on the bed, but when she didn't he quickly made a move to find her. 

He tried not to wince as his bare feet met the cold wood floor reminding him so much of his time at the first order. His stomatch dropped at the mere thought of it. He couldn't go back. Not when he knew what Hux had been planning. The red headed general was a naive fool if he thought Ben had no idea what he was up to. He could feel the dark presence of Snoke return, practically taste it. He remembered the very second he felt it again. 

The creeping dark tentacles reaching for his signature, for his soul to wrap around and suffocate the last bit of life in him. The air in the room was sucked away and his mind was filled with a hectic array of images. Images of death, destruction, and misery. One brief image passing of a woman clothed in darkness and reaching out to him, a lightsaber piercing his abdomen before it vanished and he was left gapping for air; scratching at his chest as if he could feel the lingering effects of the blade. As soon as he managed to get back onto his feet and shake the creeping feeling of someone watching him from his mind, he made his way to the hanger and hadn’t looked back since.

Now he was here. Standing in the entry way of the kitchen in a domed hunt on an outer rim planet , watching the very woman who both plauged and eliminated his dreams packing a stachel of ration bars rather hastily in front of him. He watched her curiously a moment longer as she bobbed around the small kitchen, completely oblivious to his presence. Well, oblivious, or choosing not to address his presence that is. He cleared his throat and her head snapped towards him. Bright hazel meeting brown in shock before he spoke up and questioned,

“What are you doing?"

She allowed herself the freedom to take in his posture, gazing over every inch of him before she went back to work on packing her bag. She quickly tied the bag and placed it on her shoulders responding to his question as if it were obvious as to what she was doing, 

"You said the storm is almost cleared up."

Something inside of him flinched at the thought of her wanting to leave so soon. It reminded him too much of their last encounter; when she let him on the floor of the Finalizer, and then again when she shut the door of the Mellinium Falcon on him. She was the whole reason why he had left the first order - well that and the resurrection of snoke - and now she was just going to leave him again? He was trying to protect her, warn her. Why else would he put himself in danger of being captured and executed by the resistance? He clenched his fists as he spoke in a low whisper, 

"So you would just leave without saying anything?”

He wasn't thinking straight, he didn't even tell her why he had really come for her - why he had reached out after three years. Sure, he wanted to talk, but it was more dire than that. He had to tell her about Snoke, but something inside of him had flipped. The cold dark part of him took hold again. He felt nauseous. The insecurity and fear of the people he loved leaving him alone sparked. Before he could think, he was snapping back, not giving her room to respond before he fired at her,

"You have a shot to take down the First Order right here, and you're not going to take it?"

She looked up at him in confusion, taking in his gaurded stance and clenched fists before her gaze softened. Her voice came out gentle yet firm - something she was learning from his mother. 

"I'm not going to fight you Ben."

He could feel the dark tentacles weaving in and around him, but he didn't want to fight them back - not when he was in this kind of a mood. Not when she was going to leave him again.

"Really? Because the other day you seemed more than eager to strike me down."

His eyes caught her hand that was playing nervously with a piece of metal that was attatched to a chain around her neck. A military dog tag. How had he not noticed this before? She responded as calmly as she could manage, trying to ease his raising temper,

"I didn't know what your state of mind was. I had to know what I was in for."

He moved in on her, allowing himself to invade her personal space as he spoke quietly, 

"And are you satisfied with what you've found?"

His eyes scanned over her face, moving down as her hand dropped the metal tag and he read the name on it. 

"Or does the resistance pilot outshine everyone else? "

Her eyes grew wide in shock as she took a step back, putting as much distance between them as she could in the small space. 

"What?"

He stepped in closer, forcing her to back up against a wall as he leaned down and grasped the piece of metal between his fingers. He ran a finger across the name as he spoke, 

"Dameron's dogtag."

"I-" She blinked furiously, stumbbling to find something to say.

He let the metal fall between his finger, wishing he would've yanked the necklace off instead. His jaw clenched and unclenched, taking a good look at her face. Memorizing every freckle, every line before he took a calculated step back. He turned around so he didn't have to look into those mesmorising hazel eyes as he inquired, 

"That's who you're running home to. Is it not?"

Her eyes widened in horror. He could feel the anger flicker inside of him again as he snapped back, 

"I hope he keeps you warm at night."

He didn't know why he said it. Why he assumed the pilot held her in the night, or why it was appropriate to bring up now. Maybe he wanted to know for himself, for some selfish fantasy of his where he was the only one to hold her, to know her. Of course she would find someone. He didn't really think she would want him after everything he's done, did he? An insecure part of him wanted her to be the one to heal his wounds, to be the one person he could trust. Shaking his head, he had turned away from her completely and headed back towards the main room when she finally shouted back at him, 

"Please don't do that Ben."

He turned on her with a new kind of fury. A Kylo Ren kind of fury, pushing her back towards the wall as he practically spat back, 

"Do what Rey? Have feelings?"

The two of them stood face to face, his breath coming in quickly, heart pounding as they were locked in by eachothers gazes. They seemed to be the only two in the world for the time being as everything blurred around them. There was a raw tension in the air, an unspoken hurt that neither of them wanted to awknowledge at the moment. As his breathing slowed down, he recognized something else in the air. 

The force.

The force was surrounding them, calming the hostility and pushing them closer. Not physically closer, but emotionally ripping open wounds so they could be healed. For a moment, he thought he saw her gave linger on her lips as she moved forward and placed a hand against his forearm.

"Ben."

He stubbornly brushed her off, the vaulnerability tii much for him to express as he responded, 

"Forget it."

Turning around, he made his way out of the kitchen, leaving her to wait for the storm to end so she could scurry back to her precious pilot and resistance family. Scurry away and leave him alone once again. He finally came to the conclusion that she would always be running. And he would always be alone. 

*

Rebel Base:

For the last twenty-four hours Poe Dameron had been working out the schematics of the plan they had come up with to find Rey and deliver her safely home and away from Kylo Ren. He flipped through pages and pages of maps and drawings as he sipped his hot Caf mumbling in approval of his own work. He ran a jittery hand through his disheveled locks one more time before gathering up all the papers and disposing of the rest. Gathering up the rest of the stray papers into an envelope, he stood from the old chair that he had been glued to for hours and quickly made his way for the door. 

His room was as disheveled as the array of black curls on his head - crumpled papers scattered across the carpeted floor and half empty cups of cold Caf littering his desk. He would have to tidy up later or the cleaning droid would surely have his head. With one final sip of Caf, he sprang for the door and made his way down the long corridor. It was noon now on Voss and he checked his holo pad one last time before storming into Finn’s quarters. 

Slamming the envelope down in front of his good friend, Poe moved to make sure the door was properly secured as he spoke confidently,

"Tonight's the night."

Rose popped in around the corner placing more cups of Caf on the desk and Poe cheerfully grabbed one; never could have enough Caf right?Rose gave him a weird once over before standing behind Finn and reading the papers over his shoulder. He took a seat across form the pair at the makeshift table Finn had set up, watching them intently as he waited for their response. Finally, Finn dropped the papers and took in a deep breath before he inquired

"Are you sure about this?"

He could feel the atrocious amount of caffeine he had consumed working its way through his system as he tried to make his leg stop bobbing up and down as he spoke quickly

“More sure than I should be."

He scanned the two as they gave each other that strange wordless look couples give each other. Rose took a seat next to Finn on an oddly shaped metal stool before she laced her fingers in front of her on the table and looked back into Poe’s eyes. She asked him seriously, worry lacing her question as her tone dropped

“She still hasn't made contact?"

"No. I checked again with the general at the meeting this morning." He responded promptly.

She gave him a short nod before unlacing her fingers from in front of her and waving them as she spoke, 

“Alright, run me through this again. Finn and I are going to take a craft and scan the nearby outer rim planets until we find her? 

He nodded, “Yes."

"And you're supposed to contact us if Rey gets through to the general?"

He nodded more enthusiastically this time, “Yup."

"Then why aren't you going? You said you can't just sit and wait around, but isn't that what you're doing."

He sighed before standing up and explaining his plan more thoroughly. His motions a bit more enthusiastic than he usually allowed, but he blamed it on his seemingly belligerent caffeine addiction. 

“Yes, but if I were to go on an ‘inventory mission’ the general would automatically suspect I went to find Rey."

Rose gave him a funny look and then gave Finn an equally confused look before she spoke up again, “And she's not going to be suspicious if we go?"

"No, because I may or may not have mentioned that you two.....needed some alone time." 

Roses eyes went wide as she practically boomed, “You what? Please don't tell me you discussed my sex life with the general!"

That is exactly what he did and at the moment it didn’t seem like it would be that inappropriate to discuss, but now seeing the horror in the young woman’s eyes he was beginning to regret it. Surely she would get him back later, but for now he gave her a sincerely apologetic look before turning to Finn. He gave Finn a similar look before the man whispered back to him,

"Remind me to thank you later."

He gave him a lopsided smirk as he patted his friends back, “No problem buddy."

The two turned back as the petite woman before them cleared her throat. Her hands were placed on her hips as she growled, “You guys do know I'm standing right here?"

Both men shared an equally terrified expression before Poe broke off, not wanting to be on the receiving end of Rose Tico’s heated lecture. Instead, he pushed through the door as he yelled back, 

“This way!"

He let a smile fall into his lips as he heard the woman yell down the hall as everyone stared, 

“You're dead Dameron!”

*

Leia didn’t know how to respond to the girl. Sure, she was glad to hear she was safe and sound, but the presence of her son - Kylo Ren - still unnerved her. She had talked with Rey in detail about her encounters with him and she didn’t have any doubt that her son wouldn’t dare harm Rey, but he want the same young boy she once knew. She hadn’t had a conversation with him since he was a young boy, now he was a man. 

Her son was a complete anomaly to her and apparently to everyone else she ever asked. Such a warm and emotional child growing up. He was always so in tune with his emotions and she often found him writing in his spare time. 

He wasn’t the rough and tumble boy that she expected to have with Han Solo the renowned smuggler being his father, but he wasn’t weak or lacking physicality by any means. In fact he had always been a rather lanky and large kid, always a head or two taller than the other students. Intellectual and wise beyond his years. 

He was such a good kid. Such a good student. So what happened? She often blamed herself for his down fall, for the cold darkness that seemingly suffocated the tender loving boy she used to hold in her arms. Taking in a deep breath, Leia finally allowed herself to type back.

>Rey, 'I'm happy to hear you are safe and that my son is behaving regaurdless of his new found position in the First Order. I do not expect for him to agree to coming back with you, but I do hope you will negotiate what he intends to do with the location of our current base. I know that he has the information even though we disposed of it in their data base. Please be safe.  
P.S  
I do believe Poe is planning something, although I’m unsure of what it is exactly. I will keep an eye on him. Please keep in touch. Leia

Outer Rim:

She had given him space, but really she had given herself space to figure out why she felt so guilty after their discussion earlier. Deep down she knew exactly why she felt so guilty, but it wasn’t something she was ready to revisit. She had spent three years ignoring his existence, his constant presence at the edge of her mind mainly because she was scared. She craved security and stability, but she had no clue what those things even meant.

She hope to grow and not be so dependent on others over the last three years so that when she saw him again she wouldn’t be so emotionally torn. There was something about him that pulled at her very being, that nudged her closer but wouldn’t consume her until she lowered her walls and let him fill the spaces. She thought she had found something like that with Poe. She remembered the first time he had held her and everything seemed to feel right, but now that she was face to face with Ben Solo, she felt more at piece than she ever had before. 

There was a belonging she felt with him - even when they were enemies - that she simply didn’t feel with anyone else. The force was balanced when they were near and she had not idea what to make of that, but at least she knew where to start. They couldn’t keep doing this. They couldn’t keep shutting each other out. 

Maybe there was some truth to what he had told her before. They were going to be in each others lives - light or dark. 

Swallowing her stubborn pride, Rey had made up her mind. Standing up from her her seat on the hard wooded floor, she searched the small Hutt for any sign of Ben. Reaching out through the force, she could feel him just outside of the structure. She made sure the satchel was secure on her back before taking a couple of blankets from the cot. She wrapped one around herself and held the other close as she strolled outside where Ben stood underneath a nearby tree. He was surrounded by glistening white snow, a stark contrast to the deep black clothes he wore as he stared out across a frozen body of water. She slowly made her way over to him, handing the spare blanket his way as she began,

"I'm sorry Ben. I hope you understand."

She watched him, hoping he would at least acknowledge her, but he continued to stare out over the lake as he mumbled, “Yeah."

Edging closer, she continued, “You don't have a craft."

Remaining locked in place, he responded in a similar fashion, “I'm aware."

By now she was practically touching him, inches away, as she questioned softly, “You're just going to stay here then?"

Finally he turned around to face her. He was a head taller, but their proximity made the situation more intimate than she intended. She could she his dark eyes soften as his voice mirrored the change in tone, 

“I have nowhere else to go."

The strings of her hear seemed to tug tight as she felt the pain of his words. He hated being alone as much as she did. His abandonment, although more personal, still plagued him. A strange feeling passed through her as she realized that this was Ben Solo, as raw and real as if Kylo Ren never even existed. It was so intense that she forgot what he had said until it hit her like a wave. She was completely baffled as she stuttered, 

“What- you're the supreme leader - I - I’m sorry - I don't follow?”

She waited patiently as he shifted a shaky hand through his hair before he turned away from her and responded, 

“Not anymore."


	6. What Happens in the Cantina....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello and welcome back friends! So sorry for the delay, but I’m hoping to length of this chapter makes up for it! I’m excited to share this one with you! Things get.... interesting ;) I hope you guys enjoy!

She stood there in silence for what seemed like hours before she could wrap her head around what Ben was implying. He was sitting down, back pressed firmly against the side of the hut they were occupying, a thick crease starting to make an appearance between his eyebrows. She took a moment to look over his face as she slowly inched down next to his massive form. 

Even though he refused to look up, she could see the prominent dark circles and sleep deprived red tinge to his eyes. His hair had grown out in wispy waves that were usually lush with volume; and he had the beginnings of dark stubble making their way through his now clenched jaw. How had she not noticed how exhausted he seemed before? She pressed her back against the wall, mimicking him, as she let out a sigh.

“You left the first order?”

She could hear him scoff quietly beside her, still looking intently at the ground as if he were afraid to look at her as he grumbled back, “Don’t be so surprised Rey. You were right. You knew this was coming.”

There was something about his tone that threw her off, made her question herself as she stumbled to find something to say.

“I-Don’t get me wrong, I think you did the right thing, but why did you do it now?”

His head finally turned to meet hers in a singularly slow and methodical movement. Deep chocolate eyes met hers with hurt, with a pain she couldn’t exactly pinpoint.

“Because of what I saw.”

“Like a vision?” She found herself asking.

Lifting a shaky hand, he combed back the stray strands of dark hair that hung in front of his face before he responded

“More like a nightmare.”

He was being extremely vague, and she was growing more curious by the second. What kind of vision could make Kylo Ren abandon his hard sought after role of supreme leader after three short years in command? The man looked like he hadn’t slept in a week, let alone eat anything substantial enough for a man of his size. So what is tearing him up so much that he can’t even tell her?

She stops dead in her tracks for a second as she catches herself. Why would he feel comfortable disclosing something even remotely intimate with her? She was acting as if the last three years didn’t happen; that there wasn’t a wedge currently jammed between them. That their “relationship” hadn’t been put on halt, never to return again. 

Not to mention she hasn’t necessarily been the most accommodating travel companion. But somehow he was trusting her enough to see him this vulnerable and torn up, something she was beginning to understand wasn’t a common occurrence with him. She took a deep breath, crossing her fingers that she wasn’t about to cross a line as she asked nervously,

“W- what was it about?”

He didn’t even hesitate as he responded, “Snoke.”

She turned her head towards him once again, eyebrows raised as he continued to explain before she could say anything

“At first I didn’t believe it myself, but then I felt it. I could feel him inside my head again. It was like a virus working it’s way through my mind, taking whatever it pleased.”

He paused for a brief second, a clear waver in his voice as he turned his face away from her. She tried to open their bond, something she hadn’t done in years, to feel what he was feeling. She was surprised to find a sense of guilt and remorse before it was completely shut off. He snapped his head around, giving her a sharp glare before continuing, 

“And that’s when I realized I had to get out.”

It was as if something had finally clicked inside her, something she had been pushing aside for the past year or two. The reason she also had nasty dark circles around her eyes and a messy nest of hair upon her head. Nightmares. At first that’s what she thought they were, that they were just bad dreams from all the stress she had been under through the perils of becoming a Jedi, as she became more powerful; but it was something more. She should have known when she had the same dream, the same twisted dream that often - although she hated to admit it - left her in tears. The same dream she had last night when Ben woke her up in a panic. The dream that suddenly caused her mouth to dry up and all she could manage to mutter in response was, 

“He’s back.”

She felt Ben shift completely beside her until he was looking her dead in the eyes, scanning them for any clue as to what had her so spooked, 

“Rey?”

She felt herself getting lost in her own thoughts, lost in her head. How could she be so foolish? How could she let her defenses down enough to let that monster in? She could barely hear the whisper of Ben’s voice ask, 

“Are you feeling okay?”

She finally snapped to when he raised his voice slightly, gripping her chin as she spoke, “Hey, look at me.”

She shook her head, trying to stay calm as she worked through what she just realized. 

“Yeah, I just. I think I saw something too. Maybe through you?”

He was looking down at her, hand releasing her chin, but moving to brush a strand of hair out of her eyes as he asked, “What did you see?”

So thrown by his expression of compassion and care, she froze, staring into his deep eyes. How could a man who murdered thousands, including his own father, also show such gentleness. How could the supreme leader of the first order illicit such a warmth inside her? She shifted as his voice cut through again

“Rey?”

She simply replied, “You.”

“You saw me?”

She nodded slowly before choking out, “Dead.”

———

Rose flicked and prodded at the different buttons on the dash of the ship as Finn settled in next to her on the copilot seat. They had prepped everything for their mission the night before, Poe double checking for all the essentials and making sure they were clear in what they were to do. Now here they were, just about ready to put their plan into action. Ready to find Rey and bring her home. Finn watched Rose with amusement as she slapped a blue button and chirped

“Base, this is blue 32 requesting departure for an inventory run.”

The serious voice clipped back immediately, “Blue 32, you are clear for take off.”

With that, Rose took her time to set the craft up for take off, going over any last minutes checks before she turned back to face Finn. She had a worried look on her face as she bit her lip and asked, 

“Are you sure about this? What if we don’t like what we find?”

She watched carefully as Finn shifted uncomfortably in the leather chair before he puffed his chest, playing with the tag around his neck as he responded, 

“I’m not sure about anything, but Poe has hope and that’s enough for me; whether we like what we find, that’s another thing.”

She took a deep breath and slowly let it out as she remembered her friends wide smile and snarky banter. She missed Rey as much as Finn and Poe did. She was the only girl around her age that she really knew enough to share things with, especially thing with her and Finn. Sure Rey was usually busy with her training and Jedi duties, but it was still a breath of fresh air to be able to giggle and talk about things she didn’t dare bring up with the guys. Occasionally they would even discussion mechanics. She let out another shaky breath as she hit a series of buttons that would send them off on their journey as she whispered

“I just hope she’s alright. I mean there’s a pretty large bounty out for her capture, and an even larger one out for Ren’s head.”

When she turned to look at Finn again, he had a wide grin plastered on his face. He had that look he and Poe shared when they were about to do something wild. 

“Why are you looking at me like that? Did you not hear what I just said? Finn I swear-“ she began. 

His smile widened even further that she though possible before he let out a snort and responded with

“I think you just gave us the perfect place to start our search.”

Her eyes widened as she caught his drift, “You don’t mean-“

“Oh I mean it.” He nodded slyly in return, his Cheshire grin only getting more unsettling by the moment.

“This is either going to be really fun or a complete disaster.”

———

She watched carefully as Ben stood and began to pace back and forth, moving his hands nervously at his side before he stopped completely in front of her. His intense gaze was fixed in all seriousness as he asked

“Me? Are you sure it was me?”

She remembered the first time she was met with that same intense gaze, the first time she saw the face that hid behind the facade of Kylo Ren. Only now he wasn’t just a notorious assassin and monster. Now he was Ben and the intensity of his eyes seemed less conniving and more genuine. She found herself at a loss for words, losing herself in the moment. She decided to blame it on the fact that she hadn’t seen him in years, that she was just adjusting to the intensity that was Ben Solo, but something deep inside her told her otherwise. She simply nodded at him before whispering a “Yes.”

Where she maintained control, he was a wild storm of emotion. He fiddled nervously with his surprisingly delicate and lengthy fingers before he almost demanded

“How?”

She wasn’t following him completely. She was too distracted by his hands that were still shaking by his side. He followed her gaze and quickly clenched his hands into fists, a gesture he frequently adopted. She forced her eyes to trail up and meet his again as she responded to his question 

“How what?”

This time he made an effort to contain his emotions as he asked, “How did I die?”

A tight knot formed in her chest as she relived the moment again in her head. She shouldn’t be so conflicted about this. Any sane person wouldn’t even flinch at the opportunity to kill Kylo Ren, but he wasn’t just Kylo Ren anymore - even if she did shut him out. He was Leia’s son and she had made a promise. She began to protest, 

“Ben-“

He quickly raised an ungovernable hand as he cut her off, all emotion unhinged and on display for her to see as he insisted

“How did I die Rey!”

She swallows back the lump in her throat before she continued, her glare turning just as intense as his as she replied

“By my hand.”

What he did next surprised her immensely. He, in a strange way, seemed relieved. He took a step back from her before he broke eye contact completely and strolled away; all the while mumbling, 

“So it’s true.”

She generally liked to believe that she had a good sense of people and how to understand them, but Ben Solo was another story - a complete wild card. She let herself blink a few times, trying desperately to understand before she gave in

“What are you talking about?”

He turned on her in a flash, coming just inches from her, yet completely reserved as he explained, “I saw the same thing. I had the same dream.”

She watched him closely before she tried to rationalize the situation, there had to be a reasonable explanation. However, the force - which she came to understand - had a strange way of warning or rather revealing things. Even so she tried to come up with a simple explanation.

“Maybe it’s just the bond? If it’s still intact then maybe we just shared the dream because I let my guard down?”

He let out a frustrated puff of air before he countered, “You shut me off Rey. If we both saw the same thing, then that means we saw it separately.”

She tried not to let his statement get to her, but a large part of her did feel guilty for leaving him behind; for closing the bond. She could always open it again, but she doubted he would willingly allow it. She was beginning to learn that he valued trust a lot more than one would assume. That he relied heavily on it and expected one to build that trust before he could even remotely trust them. She wondered who broke him so badly to the point where he couldn’t trust anyone, but she had an inkling of an idea who. In fact she know who.

She shook the thought of her old master from her head before she focused back on her guilt and remorse for closing him out. Maybe he could have been saved, but she remembered the conversation she had with Leia when she confessed to having a connection with her son for the first time. She remembered the general placing a hand on her shaky leg as she told her to give him time, that he needed to figure it out on his own. She had tried to explain how stubborn her son could be and Rey scoffed knowing first hand how stubborn the man really was. She wasn’t able to convince him to give it all up, he wouldn’t give it all up, so she had to shut him out. She took a deep breath, letting the memory fade before she turned to him, 

“Then what do we do? I have to make contact with the resistance soon or they’ll send someone after me.”

He gave her a quick once over, meeting her eyes again before he casually stated, “Contact them. Make something up. I have an idea.”

She tried to ignore the goosebumps that rose on her arms at the last thing he said, and the mischievous way the corners of his lips turned up. 

“Why do I have a bad feeling about this?”

He gave her a small smirk as he continued in his deep voice, “Just trust me Rey.”

She tried not to roll her eyes too much as she responded, “I’ll certainly try my best.”

———

Leia was making her way back though the base when she was approached by an officer who saluted upon arrival. The officer had a bead of sweat rolling down her fair face as if she had sprinted her way across the base to get to her. She spoke quickly,

“Captain we have an incoming message from the Falcon.”

Leia could feel her heart hammer in her chest with anticipation as she commanded back, “Punch it through to my line. And would someone page Dameron to my office?”

The officer saluted one more time before responding, “Right away mam!”

She watched the woman scurry off before she turned and made a B-line to her office. She turned the cold knob and shifted through her things before retrieving the machine on her desk that blinked red with a new message. She had just settled everything in place when there was a short knock on the door followed by Poe’s charming face poking in. When he saw her, he took the liberty of letting himself in. He turned to shut the door as he spoke, 

“You paged for me? I didn’t think we still did that.” 

She waved the young man off as he turned back around and took a seat in front of her, “Sorry, I didn’t have my comm on me. Had to do it the old way.”

He flashed her a genuine smile as he reached for a mug she set out for him, 

“Not to worry. What’s going on?”

She let him take a sip of the Caf, allowing herself a moment to take him in. He was dressed how he always dressed, in his standard issued uniform, but there was something off. His eyes were heavy, as if he hadn’t slept well, and he toyed nervously with the dog tag around his neck. She gave him a second to relax before she looked into his warm eyes and explained, 

“There’s a message from Rey. I thought you’d like to be here when I play it.”

She instantly saw the way his eyes danced as he perched up in the chair. This man was head over heels for young Rey. She let out a sigh as he cheerfully replied, “Well why didn’t you say so? Punch it!”

———

After much debate, Rey had allowed Ben to punch in the coordinates to a nearby planet that was know for its deep green forests and world renowned cantina bands. It also happened to be a popular spot for bounty hunters to rest their feet before setting out on a mission, and that’s why they were headed there- at least that’s what she gathered from Ben’s hurried explanation before he pushed her onto the ship. Now she stood behind him, glaring at the back of his head in protest as she growled, 

“There’s no way we aren’t going to be noticed in that place.”

He quickly turned around to show her a large assortment of clothing and weaponry he had managed to pile up from the various nooks and crannies of the Falcon. He gave her a lopsided grin that reminded her all to much of his father before he replied, 

“That’s why we have these.”

He motioned to a sharp shooting blaster connected to a holster and a pile of protective coverings. She blinked for a moment before turning to him, “You want us to pretend to be bounty hunters?”

He shook his head and pushed his eyebrows together as he fished out an old black leather jacket from the pile and a played with the blaster in his hand

“No. I’m going to pretend to be a bounty hunter. You’re going to be the bait.”

She watched as he held out a pair of thick force dampening cuffs that were all too similar to the ones he placed on her on Snokes ship. She immediately protested, throwing her arms over her chest in a grand gesture, 

“No way!”

She watched as the towering giant of a man inches closer to her and dared to pout as he pleaded with her, “Come on Rey, there’s a method to this. I swear.”

She matched his pout with one of her own - one with just as much attitude -as she offered, “Then why can’t I be the bounty hunter and you be the bait?”

His pout was quickly replaced by his usual scowl as he looked down at her, “Would that make you feel better?”

She gave him a cheeky grin as she nodded slowly in response, “Maybe. Now will you please tell me what you’re planning?”

———

Ben had made his way into the large cantina, covering his face with the black hood of his cowl and a strategically placed scarf. He was about a drink and a half in before he felt the sharp edge of a blaster bite him in the shoulder. The low sultry voice came close to his ear as the voice brushed at the back of his neck, making his skin crawl. He shuffled in his seat as the voice spoke, 

“You’ve really got some nerve showing your face around here. Now I suggest you stand up and follow me. Try not to make a scene.”

Rising slowly to his full height, Ben shifted his eyes briefly to meet the bright hazel eyes he knew so well, before making a move and slapping the blaster to the floor with a loud clank. He turned to face Rey, giving her a small nod before she launched herself at him, his hand moving to a defensive position. He dodged speedy kicks and sharp jabs as the people of the cantina slowly shifted their focus onto them. 

He watched as Rey dodged one of his own kicks, showing off with a back flip as she reached for the discarded blaster. She was a lot faster than she used to be, a lot more focused too. He watched in amusement as she clipped the blaster to her upper thigh and flew towards him once again, shoving him through a crowd of bounty hunters. His hands fumbled through limbs before they backed up, leaving him in the open. His hands gripped a small device that he quickly discarded into a pocket before turning his attention back to the fiery vixen that was Rey. From the corner of his eye, he could see a bounty hunter try to make a move as he realized who he was, but Rey was quick to growl a loud “He’s mine!” So the whole bar knew to stay back. 

They had to move fast before the crowd noticed who she was too. Thankfully the armor and makeup transformed her enough so the patron didn’t automatically recognize her. However, bounty hunters weren’t know for sharing all too well, especially with a bounty the size of his in their reach, and he could feel the others closing in in them. 

Rey quickly turned her attention back to him and pinned him carefully against the cold cement floor. He would be lying if he didn’t feel the heat stain his cheeks and his stomach drop at such a display, but he was brought back to reality when the cold cuffs clicked around his wrists and Rey pulled at them, signaling him to stand. She kept her eyes alert as she whispered behind him, 

“Did you get what you needed?”

In a second he in clasps one of his hands, showing her the device before she grips it and stores it away for safe keeping. He try’s to fight the devilish grin that spreads across his face as she smirks and shoved him towards the exit.


	7. All the Stars in the Sky

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello friends and welcome back! I hope you enjoy this semi fluffy break from all the crazy that has been going on. However, I must warn you, this will only be fleeting because things are about to pick up! Anyways, thank you so much for your support, it means so much to me :) Oh! if you were ever curious, the songs I listened to while writting this chapter are as follows: We Belong by Old Sea Bridge, Heaven by Julia Michaels, Forever Ago by Woodlock, The Force Theme, and Way Down We Go by Kaleo.

Rey watched skeptically as Ben flipped through the various displays that were projected in front of him, grumbling to himself as he worked through the large array of lit up maps. She decided it would probably be best if she were to keep silent while he was in such a focused state, but she was beginning to get impatient with the wait. She was never very good at following rules to begin with - Master Luke had told her as much before. However, she but her tounge and held still while Ben sorted through whatever he had to sort through. If there was one thing she was good at, it was waiting - and right now she was going to wait until he was ready. There was no point in pushing anything at this point, especially with someone so stuborn and unpredictble as Ben Solo. She didn't even look up at him until he stopped his frantick search, hands stilling by his sides. She took the opportunity to finally speak up, 

“Did you find what you were looking for?”

He ran a hand through his silky raven locks like he always did when he was nervous. She felt a strange sense of comfortability in being able to read him for once. His hand that had swept away the stray locks from his face now clenched into a fist next to his side as he frowned and grumbled back 

“Not exactly.”

She tried not to roll her eyes as he chucked the holochip against the wall and shattered into tiny pieces. He avoided her gaze as she raised a questioning eyebrow at him.

“What was it you were looking for again?”

Ben paced back and forth one more time before he stilled and turned his attention back to her. She was surprised to find no signs of anger in his face, just frustration. Maybe he was learning to control himself. Or maybe his time away from Snoke's influence has allowed him to be more of himself; the self she knew he was deep down under all those thick layers of hurt and betrayal. 

Her etes locked onto him as he took a deep breath before crouching down and taking a seat in front of her. The sheer size of him dwarfed the tiny stool he sat on in a rather comical display. She tried not to laugh at the massive man sitting calmy on the tiny stool infront of her as she gave him her full attention. He gave her a look of confusion before he continued

“Snokes location. If we can get him while he still healing, maybe we can end it for good. I thought maybe a well known bounty hunter for the first order would’ve known, or at least had an idea.”

For some reason she was stunned by his revalation. Surely the dark apprentice and former supreme leader would have an idea as to where his former master could have chosen to reside? Let alone where the first order base was. How could he not be aware of such a thing? 

“You don’t know where he is?”

Ben's seriousness didn't waver as he deadpanned back, “What do you think?" 

Rey turned on him before he could get too far inside his head again, “There’s got to be someone who knows? Maybe we can try to reach out to him?”

He turned his attention to her, moving to stand in front of her as he explained, “It doesn’t work that way. It’s not like our bond. It’s strictly one sided.”

She couldn’t just stand still and wait, she had to do something.

“What about me?”

She could already see the disapproving look in Ben's face - something he actually shared with Luke - before he asked, “What about you?”

Her feet carried her back and forth in front of him, his eyes following her every step. She paced back and forth once more before stopping dead in front of him as she tried to convince the dark prince, “What if we used me as bait? Bring me back to the first order, maybe then he’ll make an appearance.”

Ben's disapproving look only deepened, followed by his arms crossing sternly across his chest. She couldn't help but make the connection between his pout and his mother's, it was unmistakable. He gave her a once over before he responded

“Not a chance. We don’t even know what he has planned yet. We can’t just go in blind. You’re what he wants. Besides, I can’t exactly go back now. Not if I don’t want to be shot on sight.”

Before she could stop herself, the words tumbled out of her mouth, “Then maybe we can contact the resistance. Is there a chance the first order hasn’t changed base?”

She regretted it the instant she saw the hurt in his eyes before he walked away from her, avoiding the loaded question as he paced,

“No, they were mobile before I left. There were plans in the making that I wasn’t in charge of directing. I should have known sooner.”

She decided to give it another go. She had already dug herself a hole with the metion of the resitance. There's no way he could avoid what she was about to ask next

“Then why not get some help from the resistance?”

Somehow he managed, “You and I both know they won’t take well to that.”

She decided it was probably best if she let it go fro now.

“Well what do we know about Snoke so far? We need to make a list.”

She watched his shoulders tense from behind before his deep voice broke through.

“There’s one other option.”

———

Hux couldn't fight the anger that shifted violently through him as he practically crushed the holochip in his hand. His feet carried him as quickly as he could manage to the chambers that he had set aside for their true supreme leader. As he came to the door, it quickly slid open to reveal the almost completely regenerated man before him. It was miraculous really how quickly he seemed to heal - and to such a level. It was as if he were no longer looking at the same towering creature, but instead a man. He shook his head as he marched into the chambers, waiting patiently for Snoke to raise a hand for him to speak. When he was given the go, he quickly got to the point.

“There has been another spotting of Ren. Apparently he had a tussle with a rather feisty brunette bounty hunter. I think it’s safe to assume they’re up to something.”

Laughter filled the room - a sickening sound really - as the supreme leader shifted to a standing position before the general. 

“Not to fear general, Ren will mess up soon enough. I’ve made sure of it.”

The ginger watched as the man moved past him with more ease than he had ever seen before. It was a silent kind of confidence. He could feel his cheeks paint themselves an embarassing shade of peach as he questioned

“What do you mean?”

The towering man turned on him quickly, leaning in close as he gave the general a wicked grin. His grin spread like wildfire across his face as he whispered

“The girl shall be ours soon enough. It’s only a matter of time.”

———

They had been busy - flipping through holos and documenting everyting they could recall - for hours now. It was well into the middle of the night when Rey finally threw the towl in, her soft voice breaking through to him from across the hard metal table that divided them

“Hey, why don’t we take a break. We’ve been at it all night.”

He gave her a short nod, but he continued to read through the remainder of a holo display he had in front of him. He had managed to jot down some key facts before a delicate hand pushed through the display, offering him a steaming cup of what he hoped was Caf. He looked up into Rey's bloodshot hazel eyes as she insisted, “Here.”

He turned off the holo and accepted the mug as he gave her a quiet, “Thank you.”

The intoxicating aroma filled his senses as he held the steaming cup up to his lips. The bitter taste of the dark liquid giving him the instant buzz he needed to power through more holos. He was halfway through his mug when Rey’s pleasant voice broke through his thoughts yet again,

“Ben?”

He looked up at her, noticing how heavy his eyes felt for the first time, despite the buzz of caffeine running through his system. He was sure he looked a mess, judging how Rey looked. Not that she could ever look a mess, but he could see the effects of their all nighter playing on her features, and he was confident he looked even worse. He set the mug down before responding

“Yeah?”

He watched her fiddle with her hands in her lap as if she were nervous about something. Had she found something? Maybe something about him that she was too nervous to bring up for fear of how he might react. After all, he wasn’t known for having a calm personality. He tried to make himself seem relaxed and open so she could find the courage to ask what she really wanted to know. He could see a slight pink tinge to her face as she whispered ever so softly

“I’m sorry.”

He was caught completely off gaurd, he almost choked on his Caf for a moment. So that’s what was making her so nervous? He forced himself to look into her eyes as he asked, 

“For what?”

He watched her shift in her seat, clearly uncomfortable under his intense gaze as she managed, “I never meant to leave you like that. I-I just didn’t know what else to do.”

Now it was his turn to shift in his seat as the sound of her gentle voice along with her revelation evoked a strange emotion in him. A emotion he hopped he had been able to set aside. An emotion that reminded him all too much of that time three years ago. That time when he had fist met the feisty brunette on Takodona. The girl who had caused such an uproar. He let his gaze fall from hers as he responded softly,

“It’s okay.”

He was filled with an overwelming sense of longing. A longing that had been buried deep within him. The longing to get to know Rey, to be a person she could count on. Sure he knew things many probably were unaware of, but he had a strange need to know her on the most intimate of levels. To unravel that which made her the woman she had become. She was remarkable. He only craved more. He found himself questioning, 

“Tell me something?”

She looked back at him in bewilderment. He lips slightly parted as she questioned,

“What?” 

His spur of the moment confidence quickly vanished as he looked back into the confused, and slightly uncomfortable, face of the woman before him. However, his desire to know more outweighed his uncertainty because he quickly found himself asking, 

“What was it like growing up on Jakku. I mean it was obviously horrible, given everything, but there’s got to be something good you remember?”

He saw her struggle within herself for a moment, as if she were debating opening up to him before she began,

“Sometimes at night I would crawl on top of my home, an old leg of an AT-AT, and just lay there under the stars. There was something so peaceful knowing that somewhere there was someone looking up and seeing the same sky I was. It made me feel less..... alone.”

He could just picture the young version of Rey climbing the broken down machine and gazing peacefully at the stars. It gave him joy to be able to revel in the moment, the memory she had shared. He was beginning to get lost in the tranquility of it until Rey spoke again

“What about you?”

He looked at her in horror as he responded, “Me?”

He watched as she nodded slowly at him, a devious curve to her lips as she explained

“I shared something, now it’s your turn. What’s something you used to like growing up?”

He grimaced and shifted so he didn’t have to face her. She picked up on his silence and was beginning to grow frustrated with his silence.

“Come on there’s got to be something!”

He raised his hands in mock surrender before turning to face her again. Her hazel eyes large in excitement for some insight into the life of baby Ben Solo. Admittedly, he was a little irritated with the fact that she was so excited, but he moved past it.

“Okay okay. When I was little, I used to sneak into the cockpit of the Falcon when everyone was asleep and pretend like I was flying. It never lasted long, because someone always found me, but for that brief moment I felt free. There were no expectations, no disapproving glares, no hidden conversations. It was just me, and the stars.”

He could feel his chest heave as he finished his confession. Some part of him felt relief, but another part felt stripped and raw. He always found it hard to share the good times he had with his family, the times when he wasn’t in trouble or the topic of closed door discussions that his parents thought he couldn’t hear. Part of him aches for this chance to be so open with someone, to share his torrent of emotions bubbling behind the surface, but he couldn’t bare to look into Rey’s eyes that were filled with such emotion as she whispered,

“Ben.”

He felt a gentle hand placed in his arm, but he quickly stood, letting the hand fall. He made a move for the door, refusing to look at Rey as he mumbled and pointed to the hatch leading to the cold night.

“I’m sorry, I need to- yeah.”

——-

She had given him time. After opening up to her, he needed time. She knew that he was not an open book, that he needed trust and that trust had to be earned. Part of her felt comfort in the fact that he had been willing to divulge a very personal memory with her, but he also needed time. It would take more than a nice conversation to get Ben Solo to trust again, but this conversation gave her more than she hoped. It gave her insight into the man behind the mask. It gave her hope that he was someone worth fighting for, and fight she would. That’s why hours later she emerged into the cool night air with a warm blanket for the man she once thought of as a monster. 

She watched carefully as he sat on the ground, his head bent over as his chest expanded with slow inhales followed by even slower exhales. His head snapped in her direction as she edged closer. He glanced at her briefly before he stood. She held the blanket to him, 

“Here.”

He grasped it, whispering “Thanks” before wrapping it around himself. She could see the far off look in his eyes, the stains under his eyes that he tried to hide from her viewing. It wasn’t until he spoke that she realized she was staring,

“I meant what I said three years ago.”

She shook her head for a moment, taken aback by his shift in mood. He seemed more at ease. Either that, or he just wanted to avoid mention of his family for the time being. She rose an eyebrow as she responded

“And what would that be?”

He edged closer towards her, eyes piercing into her as he spoke, 

“You’re not alone.”

She found it difficult to breath, especially when he was standing so close. She could feel the intensity of his gaze, the intoxicating way he dipped his head to the side so he could get a better view of her. He heart fired rapidly in her chest as he stomach tightened. If he were anyone else, she would have thought he’d kiss her. She took in a deep breath as she managed to whisper back, 

“Neither are you.”

The slight curve to his lips just about did her in. How may times had Kylo Ren smiled? Except this wasn’t Kylo Ren anymore, this was Ben Solo. She gave him a soft smile back before breaking eye contact and shifting her gaze up.

“Look up.”

She could her his confusion as he asked, “What?”

She let a bright smile stay in her lips as she responded,

“Look up, the stars are beautiful!”

She had an odd feeling he was still looking at her as he replied in a gentle whisper, 

“Yeah, they are.”

She finally brought her gaze back to him as she cheered with excitement, 

“Have you ever seen something so wonderful? I've never seen stars so bright!"

She watched him as he looked up at the stars as he spoke, 

“If you think this is special, you should see the skies of Endor. You would love it. I know my mother always did."

She knew it was a reach, but she couldn’t stop the words from tumbling out of her mouth, not when he looked like this. Not when he looked like a dark price with a halo of stars surrounding him 

“Will you take me sometime?"

She watched him shift uncomfortably as he began, “I don't think that-“

But when he looked on her again, he couldn’t help but reply, 

“Sure Rey."

———

She watched from the coverage of the trees as the pair moved around each other. Their proximity closer than she expected, but that would only make things easier for her. Ducking slightly, Ava spoke into her portable comm in a professional tone

“Sir, I have located them."

The high and poshly accented voice echoed back to her through the small device, 

“Follow instructions as planned. They need to trust you if our plan is going to work."

She let her eyes wonder back to the couple as the tall dark haired knight gazed cheerfully at the petite brunette beside him. She hesitated as she questioned, “Are you sure about this sir."

The voice grew irritated as he practically chastised, “The supreme leader has made it very clear what is to be done. I think you know what is at stake if you do not complete this mission. Am I clear?"

She dropped the device in her had firmly, her focus set on the couple as she replied

“Yes sir."


	8. Watch Your Back

"Finn, do you even know what a bounty hunter does?"

They had been traveling through space for a good day now, finally settling on a planet to venture towards. Rose tried to convince Finn that the planet wasn't the most welcoming one because of its ridiculous amount of bounty hunters, but that's when he insisted that they should just try to pretend to be bounty hunters and that it would help them find Rey faster.

She practically rolled her eyes at that. It was amazing how much she could hate and love someone at the same time. Sometimes she wondered how she managed it. Now here she was, hands on her hips as she waited for a response from her boyfriend.

"Yeah- sure - they bounty and stuff. Capture crazy people like Kylo Ren."

Rose shot her hands up in the air, before she shouted

"Yeah, but this isn't like a movie on the holonet! This is dangerous stuff. We have to make sure our story is right."

Finn scoffed as he brushed off his shoulders and responded in that fake cool voice he always tried when he wanted to convince people he was sure of something. She knew this tone far too well to fall for it, but still he tried anyways.

"Relax. I've got this."

She rolled her eyes for the second time within the minute before softening her tone

"I've heard that before. Besides, don't you think I'm a little short to be a bounty hunter?"

Finn reached out his arms, taking her into his embrace as he chirped

"Yeah, but you make up for it in spirit."

Rose shook her head against his chest as she protested

"No. That is not how it works."

Finn finally gave in, "Okay, okay fine."

Silence fell around the two as they embraced. Rose smiled at the moment that they so rarely experienced on the base. She enjoyed it really, until Finn broke the silence

"Wonga winga?"

She pushed away from him, eyes widening as she exclaimed

"No no no. Not again! You always win."

He folded his hands in front of him as he pleaded with her. He was way too good at using those puppy dog eyes. She would have to curse Poe later for teaching him just how to get his way.

"Just this once? Come on, for Rey?"

She sighed, "Fine. If I win, we come up with another plan?"

Finn gave her a wide smile, "Sure."

"Wonga winga cingee wooze, which of these do I choose?"

"Stars above and star below, show me now which way to go."

She watched as his hand moved and that was it. He won, he always wins. She should have known.

"Ah come on!"

Finn leaned forward as he placed a gentle kiss on her forehead before moving back to the cockpit shouting over his shoulder

"The stars never lie. Come on."

—

When he had finally drifted off it had been early morning. It was now well past noon, standard time, and the craft was completely silent. Ben took a moment to gather himself and run his fingers through his disheveled waves, reveling in the silence, before making his way through the halls of the Falcon. No matter how many times he had walked through this ship since his childhood, it always managed to fill him with anxiety. The haunted memories dancing around him like a nightmare. He had managed to make it to the main hall when he was struck by the same silence from his quarters. He had to admit, Rey was rather silent when she wanted to be, but this felt different. He couldn't sense her on the ship. Reluctantly he called out, "Rey?"

When no reply came, he tried again. "Rey?"

Frustrated, he huffed his way out to see if she had gone out for air. As he emerged from the craft, he was struck by a pleasant scent that filled the air around him. Something rich in fat, but slightly sweet? He stopped dead in his tracks when his eyes landed on her - ever the survivor - as she roasted some kind of meat over an open flame. He let a small smile reach his lips as he watched her expertly work the stick before he spoke up,

"There you are."

She jumped slightly, but regained her composure quickly as she shifted to face him, her eyes drifting between him and the food as she asked,

"Hungry?"

He raised his eyebrows at her as he responded neutrally,

"You do know there are a ton of ration bars on the ship?"

He watched in amusement as one of her eyebrows lifted as the other dropped and she took on a rather jovial tone as if they had been friends for years,

"Yes, but have you tasted ration bars?"

He gave a small laugh in response,

"I guess you've got a point"

Rey continued to make a joke out of it, hands on her hips as she continued,

"But I'm sure the supreme leader gets a five star meal every night? Breakfast in bed?"

He made an exaggerated gesticulation with his hands as if he were royalty - which he sort of was - as he responded, "Something like that."

Their laughter filled the air. His ears hummed to the pleasant tune. This was the first time they have been able to relax, and damn did it feel nice. He shifted his gaze back to Rey as her face turned serious and she whispered,

"Just so you know, I'm not going to serve you anything. Especially not in bed."

He shrugged as he responded "Maybe not."

Then he raised his hand like he would for any old mind trick, a trick he used often before, as he continued "but I can always-"

She cut him off in mock astonishment, "You wouldn't?"

He just gave a quick raise of his eyebrows in response. Rey gave a small smile and a brief once over as she continued

"I take it back, you would."

Everything felt peaceful for once. It was the first time he felt at ease, ever really. However, all good things come to an end - and he knew that better than anyone else. So it shouldn't have been a surprise to him when a pericing scream filled the air, followed by a pained voice crying out

"Help, someone help!"

Rey stood up quickly on edge, looking over to where the voice came from. She took a second to access the distance and damage to the individual through the force, but wasted no time in filling the role of Jedi Knight

"Its a woman. Looks like a blaster wound."

Something didn't feel right. This wasn't right, but he couldn't put a finger on it. Instead he reached for Rey's arm and pulled her back as he spoke under his breath

"Hold on."

Her hazel eyes rose and widened in shock as she protested, wiggling out of his tight hold

"Ben, we have to help her. She'll bleed out."

He wasn't going to get them both killed. The people on this planet were the scum beneath a sanitation workers shoes, and he knew that all too well. He pleaded with the young woman before him,

"We don't know her Rey! This planet is filled with bounty hunters and war criminals."

Her eyes filled with something, that look. He knew that look. She was angry with him.

"She's hurt! You just want to leave her to die? Ben!"

"Fine!" He snapped, breathing heavily in frustration. Rey's eyes softened slightly at that, but still held some of the fire from before. With one final glare, she turned on her heels and made her way towards the woman.

His eyes followed the back of Rey as she ran to rescue the woman who would probably end up killing them both. Ben shrugged the tension out of his shoulders before he took up a light jog. When he arrived he could hear Rey questioning the wounded woman in a soft voice

"Can you walk?"

The woman's voice came out in a pained groan, he throat probably dry from screaming.

"I don't think so. My leg looks like it's broken close to the ankle."

He watched as Rey quickly stood and then squatted again, making a move to lift the woman herself. There was a tug on his heart, something that only she could evoke. The way she fought for this woman she didn't even know. She wrapped her arms around the woman's waist as she spoke

"Here, just stay still!"

He didn't doubt that she would be able to carry the woman, she was strong for her size, but he did have a much larger frame and could easily lift the petite injured woman. Ben moved in, pushing Rey aside as he moved to pick up the woman

"I've got it."

Not looking back, he simply pushed forward towards the ship trying to be careful not to aggravate the woman's leg or blaster wounds. As he edged the entrance of the ship, he moved aside to let Rey through. She threw all the contents of the table to the ground in one careless wave of her hand. Gently, Ben placed the woman on the table as he turned to Rey,

"There's a med kit here somewhere. Do you know where?"

She simply shrugged her shoulders and waved her hand as she explained

"We don't need it. I can heal her with the force. Do you know how to set her leg in place?"

Pride. That's what he felt when she told him she was able to heal through the force. She had learned to do this on her own, without anyone else for support, or at least anyone that would truly understand. He never realized how strong she really was, much stronger than him. He was brought out of his weird daydream when Rey cleared her throat. Her hands on her hips, waiting impatiently for an answer. That's right, she had asked him a question. He simply nodded and gave a quick "Yeah" before moving back towards the woman.

He took a look at her leg to access where it needed alignment before finally looking into her eyes. Deep chocolate brown eyes looked back at him, pain practically dripping from her glare. He locked his dark eyes on hers as he whispered,

"This is going to hurt."

He watched the woman grip the edges of the table before she nodded and replied

"Just do it."

In one quick slight of hand, he snapped her mangled leg back into place, quickly wrapping it so it would hold. The crack was sickening and reminded him all too much of his time as an apprentice under Snoke. He was all too familiar with anatomy and how to set broken bones as well as a multitude of injuries. As he finished the wrap, he glanced back up at the woman who was fighting to keep her eyes open. He moved so Rey could take up his place as he grumbled

"Might want to work fast before she passes out."

Rey nodded her head, switching places which him as she replied

"On it."

—

It had been nearly seven hours since she finished healing the woman. The task itself had drained her completely. She never had to use the force to heal such an injury, but it proved to be more taxing than she had presumed. Ben had made himself useful in the cockpit, doing a scan of the ship. He was likely still mad at her, but she didn't regret helping the injured woman one bit. She didn't understand why he felt so conflicted about it. When she heard movement in the main hub, she made her way to check on their visitor. As she entered, her eye caught the woman moving to sit up. Rey quickly made a move to help her into a seated position, propping a pillow behind her.

"Better?"

The woman gave her a small smile as she replied

"Yes, thank you."

Reaching around herself, Rey picked up a mug of water that she brought in for the woman and handed it to her

"Here."

She watched carefully as the woman accepted the mug and quickly down d the contents. She took this time to take in her appearance. She was a woman of average height, small in stature but not weak by any means. Rey watched the lean muscles ripple in her arms as she readjusted herself. Her dark blonde hair that used to be tied up, was now in long cascading waves down her back. Her face was feminine and soft. Any man would be happy to have her by their side - she was gorgeous really. She wondered briefly if Ben noticed her beauty as well. Shaking her head, Rey questioned

"Do you have a name?"

The woman's head moved up, deep eyes meeting Rey's as she responded,

"Ava."

Rey moved to sit next to her, "I'm Rey."

Ava gave her a smile as she placed her delicate hand on Rey's forearm

"Rey, thank you. I owe you. Please, let me pay you for your troubles."

She made a move to reach for money, but Rey's arm shot out and stopped her as she began to protest

"No, no that won't be necessary! But, can you tell me how you got injured?"

She watched the woman struggle with something, swallowing hard to fight back what were probably tears before she managed to choke out

"My home was raided by a group of bounty hunters of the first order. I told them I don't know anything, but they refused to listen. They thought I was harbouring fugitives."

Now Rey was comforting her. She had never been a soft and comforting woman, finding these situations awkward, but she had learned a lot from her friends. She placed a hand on Ava's arm

"I'm so sorry."

There was a brief moment of silence between the two before Ava spoke up,

"You are Jedi?"

"Yes." Rey simply nodded as if it were second nature now.

"And your friend is too?"

She was stuck with that one. How did she describe who Ben was? Not to mention his role as Kylo Ren and the former Supreme leader of the First Order - the people who ransacked her home. The man was an enigma to begin with. Finding it too hard to explain, she found herself nodding as saying

"He- he's- a Jedi in training...Please, rest. Your body needs it."

With that, she made a B-line for the closest exit.

—

After taking a moment to meditate and try to calm herself, Rey decided it would probably be best to talk to Ben, even though she'd rather be doing anything else than arguing with the stubborn man. Tiptoeing carefully as to not wake up Ava, who had moved to an open room, Rey made her way to the cockpit. As she turned the last corner, she spotted him crouched in front of the main control panel, hair flipped forward as he tried to fit his massive frame into the tight space. She cleared her throat to get his attention, his head practically hitting the panel as he jerked up. She watched a stay bead of sweat roll from his brow as he pushed his dark locks out of the way. He straightened up, throwing a strange looking tool to the side as he spoke,

"As soon as she's healed, she's out."

She tried not to be surprised at his lack of empathy for the stranger. Taking a deep breathe, she tried to explain

"Ben, the first order destroyed her home. Who knows what's left of it? We can't just send her back to live off of scraps. Not when we have enough rations to help her out."

His long legs moved across the space, reaching the stray took he tossed aside earlier as he responded just as emotionlessly

"Then we send her on her way with food, blankets, and whatever I have in credits."

Her patience was running thin with him. She wanted so desperately to make him see things through her eyes, but he was too stubborn for that. Clenching her fists into balls at her sides, Rey willed her body to move from its perch against the cool metal wall of the Falcon to block Ben as she began questioning

"Why are you being so-"

He cut her off quickly, inching closer to her

"Rational? Rey, when are you going to learn that not everyone can be trusted? There are people who will use and abuse you without a second of hesitation. Why can't you understand that?"

Red. All she was was red and she was furious. How dare he? Did he not remember she had grown up as a scavenger? She knew better than anyone else that there were people who could and couldn't be trusted, but she knew that she could trust Ava. She shot back in blind anger

"Like how Snoke used you for years? Maybe It's not my willingness to trust, but your lack of it."

She pushed through the force, moving him out of the way as she stormed out past him. The pain she felt through their bond was sharp. She didn't dare to look back, but she knew those deep eyes were filled with emotion as his deep voice was the last thing she heard

"Rey."

—

So that's how she found herself an hour later. Sitting in Ava's chamber, explaining the weird relationship between her and Ben as best as she could without making them seem like a couple, because they weren't and she refused to think of him in such a way. He was a... friend? No, friend was too pure of a word for him, but still she couldn't help but accept him as just that.

She wondered what Poe would think of this. Surely he would know what to say to cheer her up, to get Ben out of her head. It was a selfish thing really. To be involved with someone as selfless as Poe while harboring a deep connection with another. She wasn't even sure what Poe was to her. Sure there had been whispered sweet nothings in the night and sweet kisses, but there had never been any serious passion - like there always was with Ben. She was supposed to be mad at him, but she couldn't find it in herself to hold onto that feeling. Biting her lip, she drew blood, trying to get her mind off of the dark prince. Ava's voice helped bring her back to reality as she whispered

"I'm sorry about your friend. You two seem like a good team."

When Rey only nodded, she continued

"He doesn't trust me. Does he?"

Rey shook her head, looking at the young woman before her as she responded

"No, but I do. Don't worry about him, he has... trust issues. I promise you will be safe here, stay as long as you wish."

Ava smiled, a slightly crooked toothy smile, but a genuine smile none the less

"Thank you Rey."

Rey responded warmly

"No problem."

A comfortable silence fell around them as Rey was still deep in her head. The comfortability between the two felt like they had known each other for a decade, or like they were once sisters.

Ava interrupted her thoughts once again as she cleared her through and questioned

"Rey?"

Rey turned her attention back to her, finding Ava twirling her fingers together as if what she were about to say was embarrassing or difficult

"I feel like I must confess something."

Rey's eyebrows raised as she encouraged

"Yes?"

Ava took a deep breath, inhaling before letting the breath go in a long and steady exhale. She stood so she was facing Rey as she explained

"I knew who your parents were."

Her stomach dropped. Her parents? Rey hadn't had to worry about her parents for years. As far as anyone else knew, her parents were dead. No one else knew that they were horrible monsters besides Ben. She had pushed that aside, dissociated herself from the people who had abandoned her, and chose instead to focus on becoming the best Jedi she could possibly be - and she didn't even think she was succeeding in that if she was honest with herself. Her voice came out in a try croak

"My parents mean nothing to me anymore."

Ava moved closer to Rey, who had turned away, as she gently prodded

"Are you sure?"

Rey's feet spun quickly to face the woman. Her voice was steady and firm this time as she snapped back

"They were junkies, they never cared."

She saw Ava's eyes soften before she calmly responded

"They may have been junkies, but they did care!"

Who was this girl? How dare she try to understand who her parents were and what they meant to her. Rey was confused by the strange shift in the air, as if this girl really knew who she was.

"How do you know that?"

Ava began to shake, her leg still not fully healed yet, so she took a seat on the bed before explaining

"Our parents were friends once upon a time. I only recently made the connection between you and your mother. You look very similar. Here, I have a picture."

The woman moved to take out a crumpled picture from her pocket before handing it to Rey. Rey traced the lines of her parents figures, falling in her mother who indeed looked identical to Rey herself. She felt a tight knot form in her throat as she handed to crumpled photo back.

"I-I. I'm sorry Ava, this is a lot to take in. I haven't had much sleep, I think we should talk in the morning."

Ava handed to photo back to Rey to keep as she gave her a sad smile

"Of course, I understand. Goodnight Rey."

—

Ben had managed to cool off literally with a cold shower after his conversation with Rey. She always had this was of getting under his skin, this way of bringing both the best and worst out of him. Now he found himself laying in his quarters, staring up at the bland ceiling, trying not to overwhelm himself with thought of Rey and the sharp words she threw at him earlier. He was a puppet to Snoke, that was true, but he had tried to move in from that - to atone. He snapped his attention to the door at the sound of it sliding open. In the gram stood Rey, hair splaying from the braid draped over her shoulder, wet tear stains under her hazel eyes. He shot up instantly, moving towards her hesitantly as she looked at the floor.

"Hey, what's going on?"

As he edge closer her breaths came in at a rapid pace. If she wasn't careful she would go into a panic attack. Maybe she already was having one, he should know. He edged in even closer, placing a large hand in her shoulder as she whispered

"Rey, you need to breathe."

Between quick sharp inhales and tears steaming from her eyes, she managed to get out

"B-ben."

His eyes softened at seeing her unravel before him. She was always so strong. He was supposed to be the broken one, not her. He could feel himself grow angry with the idea that someone could have caused this. Did he cause it? If he did, he didn't mean to. Maybe she was hurt? That girl. Ben let his voice come out in the softest of whispers as he let his eyes scan over her looking for any injuries

"Yeah? What's wrong? Are you hurt? Did she hurt you?"

She was sniffling now and it was breaking his heart. He cursed himself that she could easily break him, split his soul into two, with just one tear. How could he let himself fall so hard for this woman. This woman who was most definitely not interested in him, but he couldn't help but try to win her over. She struggled to speak

"N-no, I just-"

That's when she wrapped her arms around him. His larger team enveloping her completely as he finally gave in and embraced her back. He let his hand caress her head as he whispered into her hair

"Shhhh. Hey, it's okay. Just focus of breathing."

She didn't lighten her grasp on him as she mumbled into the dark fabric of his chest

"My parents. She knew my parents."

—

He was furious. As soon as Rey passed out from exhaustion he had gently placed her in her quarters and made his way down the hall. He walked through the room without knocking. In any other circumstance this would be Extremely inappropriate and rude, but he didn't give a shit. He had a feeling, but now he was sold. Scan perked up from her bed in confusion as he slammed the panel to close the door behind him as he growled out

"You have some nerve."

Her large brown eyes widened as she watched him close in on her, clutching the sheets to her chest in terror

"Excuse me?"

He was the first orders number one interrogator. He knew bantha shit when he saw it, and this girl was full of it. His body was massive and he was an intimidating presence, he knew that all too well. So he used it to his advantage as he inches closer to the woman, invading personal space as he hissed holding his hand out as if he were prepared to dig through her mind any second.

"Who are you really? The more you struggle, the harder this will be."

He watched the shy and sweet woman that Rey had come to know harden her gaze as she responded dryly

"My name is Ava."

He slammed his hand against the wall of the small chamber as he fumed with irritation

"Cut the bullshit. You know who I am, you know who Rey is. What do you want? Money? I can get you money if that's what you want."

Her voice dropped into an angry shout as if to match his as she faced him, not scared in the least bit as she spat back

"I want freedom. I want my family back."

Ben eased up slightly when he realized what she was insinuating

"You work for him."

However, Ava wasn't finished yet. She ground out, emotion clearly laced into her words as she spoke

"He told me he'd get my daughter back if I did this last mission."

Ben back off completely now, recognizing the same vulnerability in her as he had in himself so many years ago. He sighed before softening his voice

"You're never going to get her back. Not when you're dealing with him."

He watched as her eyes darkened with the fierce hatred and anger that only came with the dark side. She moved on him till she was eye level with him before she spat

"Then you'll never get her."

Ben scoffed at her, as if he didn't know what she was talking about. She pushed further, practically pushing him against the wall as she continued

"Don't even try to pretend she doesn't mean something to you."

Ben pushed back, not willing to let this woman push him around. He was a murderer, a cold hearted monster and she was about to see just how savage he could actually be.

"And when I tell her who you really are it won't matter."

He watched her lips turn into a cocksure smirk as she snorted

"And when I tell her you were responsible for her parents death, you won't matter."

That drew the line. His hands clenched into fists as he shouted back

"Her parents were fucking junkies. I had nothing to do with their deaths!"

Ava continued to smile, a sultry demonic sort of smile, as she crossed her arms over her chest.

"But who do you think she's going to trust? The manipulating Kylo Ren or the innocent bystander who lost her family?The choice is yours Ren."

Ben felt her arm shoot forward, gripping Ava's in a death grip that was sure to leave marks as he hissed

"I can't lose her again. I will not lose her."

She shook off his arm, hissing at the friction before turning her back to him.

"I'm sorry. Unless you can promise me the safe delivery of my daughter, she's dead to you."

—


	9. Change of Plans

The night before had been such a blur for her. She vaugely remembered walking down the moonlit halls of the Millenium Falcon, hesitating briefly in front of Ben's quarters before she burst through and was enveloped in his massive arms. Now she woke alone in her bunk with stale tears crusted to her cheeks that were pink from sleep. Her body protested vehemently as she peeled herself off of the stiff bunk, swinging her legs around until her feet hit the floor beneath her.

Breath in. Breath out. This was the mantra she spoke to herself over and over again to herself until a loud clank sounded through out the ship, effectively breaking her off from her moment of meditation. A sigh blew through her parted lips as she made her way into the main hall of the ship. Another loud clank echoed through the thin walls making her jump at the harshness of it. Straightening her back, Rey made for the cockpit where the sound came from. Her throat was hoarse from the other night as she tried to croak out

"Ben?"

As she rounded the corner, her eyes locked onto the giant of a man who had somehow managed to cram himself underneath the corner control panel in the cockpit. She held back a smirk at the scene in front of her as she questioned

"What are you doing?"

His hands were frantic against the delicate wiring as he shifted through, tools littering the floor around him as he worked. He didnt so much as blink when she spoke. If it werent for his labored breathing, she would have thought he was sleep walking. She cleared her throat before continuing

"Do you even know what you're doing?"

He kept his eyes trained on whatever he was getting himself into as she stood waiting for his response. She crouched down in order to get a better view at what he was doing. Rewiring a panel that didn't need to be rewired. She watched in confusion for a moment until his hands brushed across a yellow wire. He made a move to detatch it, but she was quicker, yelling as best she could with her sore throat.

"No, no, no!"

Her hands shot out in front of her as she snatched the tool from his hands, castising him along the way

"Give that to me!"

That's when his eyes finally met hers. Deep chocolate eyes filled with something she couldn't quite place. He looked like a porg caught in headlights before he adverted his gaze from her completely, but she wasn't finnished with him yet

"Do you want to get us all killed?"

He managed to pry himself out of the small corner, head down as he replied

"Sorry."

She felt a surge of regret for yelling at him, especially when he was in such a panicy state, but she brushed it off. She tried to soften her voice as she shifted to take his place

"I'll fix it."

When he didn't reply, Rey got to work. It was strange at first, working in silence, but she was used to it back on Jakku when she would scavange whole imperial destroyers by herself. When she was satisfied with her work, she shimmied her way out, wiping the excess grease on her pants as she stood to face him. He was sitting in the pilots seat, looking out before him at the stillness of the trees along the horizon. She took a seat in the co-pilot chair next to him, looking over her shoulder as he finally turned to face her.

His face was void of emotion as he asked

"Are you okay?"

She snorted in surprise causing him to lift an eyebrow at her.

"I feel like I should be the one asking you that considering you almost incinerated all of us."

He turned his eyes back on the landscape before him, shrugging his shoulders in a childlike way. She let out a small snort before trying again

"Okay fine. I won't judge your mechanic skills anymore, just please don't touch anything."

Silence filled the space surrounding the two. Rey shifted in her seat in order to face him more as she realized she never responded to his previous question

"I'm fine."

His head remained glued in front of him as he continued on

"Have you talked to her?"

She watched carefully as his right hand tightened at his side. He was mad, that was for sure, but why would he be mad at her?

"No. I just..."

She placed a hand on his shoulder as her reply died on her lips. His head snapped to face her at the contact, his eye locked on hers as he whispered

"What?"

She softened her voice to match his, hand still on his shoulder as she whispered back

"Your shaking."

And just like that he was up and darting out of the cockpit. His strides were ridicously long, but Rey was fast on her feet afer him. His back was towards her as she souted after him across the space

"Ben!"

He stalled. A beat passed before his fists unclenched and he turned around to face her. She had never been more confused in her life, not even when she was trying to figure out the force- no the force was easy to understand, but Ben Solo was another story completely. She took steady steps closer as she spoke in a hushed voice as if she didn't just yell at him across the ship.

"What the Kriff is going on? Are you mad at me?"

Before he could respond, Ava was making her way down the hall, a worried look leaking into her usualy soft features. She was drying off her damp hair and wrapping the towel around her neck as she questioned

"Hey Guys is everything okay?"

Rey gave Ben one last look before she turned her attention back to their visitor, but she didn't miss the fire that danced in his eyes as he turned his head away from Ava.

"Ava. Good morning! How did you sleep?"

The woman looked between the two force users, her eyes lingering a moment longer on Ben, before she cautiously responded.

"Fine. You?"

That's when Ben turned and pushed past Ava, closing the door to his quarters behind him. Rey let out an exhausted sigh as she turned back to Ava

"Fine."

—

It was well into noon by the time Rey approached him again. Now he was outside, sitting on the ground in a meditative stance- legs crossed underneath. She was briefly caught off gaurd at his postion. She didn't take the mighty Kylo Ren for a meditation sort of guy, she always thought he was more... hands on. And his face. His face, usually serious and focused, was now soft and peaceful. Her steps were cautious as she took a seat on the rough gravel ground beside him. She spoke as calmy as she could as if not to disturbe the softness of his brow or the curve of his lips.

"You want to tell me what's going on?"

He replied just as calmly, almost too zen for the Ben she knew.

"Change of plans."

"What?"

"We need to make a move and soon."

Breaking her seated position, Rey stood, making a move to stand in front of him as she raised her voice

"Are you insane? We don't know what we are getting into. Do you really think it would be wise to risk it all?"

Ben opened one eye at a time, looking up at her with raised eyebrows as he replied

"I'm thinking that Snoke is getting stronger and stronger by the second. Acting now will cut our loses."

Rey crossed her arms protectivly across her chest, looking down at the man before her

"What do you have in mind?"

At this, he peeled himself off of the ground, dusting off his trousers as he explained in a firm voice

"Snoke wants us? Let's give him what he wants."

His back was turned to hers as she began

"Ben-"

He quickly cut her off, spinning on her in a second as he raised his voice. His soft brows and upturned lips were replaced with scrutched up brows and a frown

"Force, would you just trust me Rey? For once, would you trust me?"

She took a step back at his tone. He didn't sound like Ben any more, he sounded like Kylo. Her eyes scanned him as she took in his defensive stance, face void of emotion. He was dissociating himself, but why? SHe had a feeling, but she wanted to know for sure.

"Look at yourself. What put you on edge like this? I thought our original plan was fine."

She was met with the span of his back as he turned away from her for what felt like the billionth time that day. She could feel the anger grown inside of her before she tried to calm herself down. Yelling at him wouldn't solve anything. If she was going to help him, she was going to have to look inside of herself. They were connected after all.

"Hey" she tired.

He spun around on her again as he fell apart before her very own eyes, emotion clear in his voice

"I can't loose anyone else Rey okay!"

Her mouth opened to respond, but nothing came out. He looked into her eyes once before continuing

"If you don't like the plan, then don't come. I'll go by myself."

A scoff flew out of her at what he was insinuating

"That's a suicide mission and you know it! Do you want to die?"

"Either you're in or out Rey? I won't ask again."

His gaze was piercing as he looked down at her. Their heigh difference felt even more prominent when he was angry. He practically towered over her now, but she would not be phased. She would try her best to reason with him

"This isn't the only way. This is rash and foolish, even I know that."

His frown softened briefly at the hope in her eyes before he turned again causing Rey to roll her eyes. His voice was deep and monotone as he replied

"There's no other option. This is final."

—

She didn't get it, and she wouldn't even begin to try to understand it. She had tried to stop the feelings as soon as they bubbled up inside of her. Warm tears filled her eyes as she made her way back up the ramp to the Falcon, feet shuffling against the metal grating. The emotion stayed with her as if she were already grieving the death of her bond partner. This was ridiculous. This wan't something she should be so emotional about. This man was Kylo Ren, he was a murderer and a bad guy. But for some reason she couldn't stop feeling things for him. Feeling things that Jedi really shouldn't feel, especially when she had someone egarly waiting up for her back home. She took a deep breath in before letting it go and taking a seat on one of the spare chairs in the main hub of the ship. She sunk her head to her knees, hands holding it in place as she let a few tears fall.

"Rey? Are you okay?"

Ava's soft voice broke through the heavy silence in a whisper. Rey made a move to wipe the tears away, slowly lifting her head to look at the woman as she responded

"I think so. I don't know. No, not really."

As Rey's voice broke, she watched as Ava made her way over to her quickly,. The woman took a seat next to her, drapping an arm around her shoulder as she tried to soothe her.

"Hey it's okay. What happened? Things have been kind of tense here since I came along. I'm sorry if I caused you guys any problems."

Rey shook her head as she tried to explain as simply as she could

"No it's fine. It's not your fault. Ben just... something happened. He's closing himself off."

"Do you know why?"

"I don't know. He has this ridiculous plan for the mission. A suicide mission really."

Rey watched as Ava shifted in her seat so she could get a better look at her face. The woman looked over her shoulder as if she was looking for someone before she lowered her voice in question

"Is he like this a lot? Temperamental? Unpredictable?"

Rey waved her off as if to say he wasn't here as she replied

"Usually, but I thought he was getting past that."

The two paused for a moment before Ava whispered

"You care about him?"

Rey felt her head snap up to meet the woman's, a protest on her lips before she realized Ava didn't know about their connection, about the complexity of their relationship.

"We share... a bond of sorts."

The girls eyes widened before she placed a hand on Rey's leg

"I'm sorry."

She shrugged her shoulders in repsonse

"We've managed."

Ava moved to get up, making her way towards a counter that held various drinks as she spoke casually

"I don't know how you can do it."

"Do what?" Rey questioned

The woman pulled out a glass bottle filled with an amber liquid and took out two small mugs as she replied

"Be bonded to a murderer."

Rey watched her pour the crimson liquid as she listened to their visotor explain

"I mean civilians are one thing but family... I give you props for working with that."

Oh. Han. Rey let a slow breath out before she spoke up

"It was hard. Han was like a father to me."

Avan was making her way back to Rey, eyes dark as she whispered

"Han? Oh sweetie I'm not talking about Han Solo."

Rey accepted the mug, eyes never leaving Ava's as she spoke

"I'm not following?"

Ava took a seat across from her this time. Tucking a stray hair behind her ear as she asked

"You don't know?"

Rey watched her take a long sip before almost choking on it and spitting out

"Oh force, you don't know."

Rey was confused. The force around her was screaming, crying out, trying to tell her something, but she was trying to focus on what Ava had to say

"Know what?"

The blonde's lips curved into a frown as her voice softened

"Your family, sure they were junkies, but that's not how they died."

Rey watched her for a long time, trying to tune out the force as she connected the dots. Ben? He had told her her parents were junkies and that they overdosed. She believed him because she felt it in the force. Not only that, but she had made a trip back to Jakku last year to confirm. Her parents lay dead in the Jakku desert, so why was this woman lying to her. That's when everything clicked. Why Ben was on edge, why the force was so loud. They were all warnings. Suddenly the soften and gentle woman before her seemed to morph. Rey's eyes locked onto the small scar under her left ear lobe and the lond scar along her forarm. This woman was not who she said she was. As she delved deeper into the force, Rey could feel the darkness surrounding the blonde. She cursed herself for not catching it sooner. SHe had even yelled at Ben for not wanting to help.

Taking a deep breath, Rey closed off her anger towards the woman as she tried to play along as if she had not just had an epiphany

"I'm- are you- Ben?"

She watched as Ava's lips curled slightly as she whispered

"Killed your parents."

—

He had been waundering aimlessly for about an hour after he had stormed off and Rey headed back to the Falcon in frustration. He didn't mean to be so bipolar around her, he just didn't want her to get hurt anymore than she already had, especially now that Ava could easily convince Rey that he had a hand in killing her parents. It pained him, if he was honest with himself, to think that Rey would believe a total stranger over him, but he really hasn't given her much to work with in terms of his character. He was beyond frustrated at this point. Surely the universe had some kind of beef with him. I mean he sold his soul to the darkside, just to realize that he never belonged to the darkside and now when he is ready to make a step in the right direction, this woman shows up. Ben curses under his breath, kicking up the dirst around him as he paces.

He can't do anything right even if he tried. Maybe he was a monster after all. Or at least that's what he thought his whole life. From the very first time he felt the force within him - that's when he knew he was a monster. When his parents looked at him with terror in their eyes. He didn't mean to scare anyone, he was just too unfamiliar, too strong to control his powers. Even now he barely had hold on the ripple of power that surrounded him in the force - it was exhausting. It wasn't until Rey came along that he felt normal for once. She had the same power, the same strength in the force, but she controlled it so effortlessly. She was something else. She was his other half in terms of the bond they now shared, but she would have to hate him the rest of her life - he would make sure of that because nothing good came from loving Ben Solo. All he brought was destruction and chaos. That's why he found himself here, alone, far from the ship and away from Rey.

At least he was alone for a while until he felt a spike of adrenaline through their bond that had been closed previously. His head snapped sharply to the right as he saw the petite form of Rey storming towards him, kicking up the dirt around her in the process. She had a strong furrow to her brow as she shouted out

"How dare you!"

Now he was confused. It wasn't really a strange occurance for Rey to be mad at him, but she seemed completely peeved right now. He shifted uncomfortable on his feet to face her as she closed in on him.

"Rey?"

She was closing the distance between them fast, her face becoming more clear in the process. Her eyes danced with fire as she practically screamed

"You Kriffing bastard! You lied to me! Right to my face and I trusted you! I was vulnerable and you took advantage!"

There was a weird nudge in the force, something prompting him to understand, but he wasn't following. Rey seemed to be pissed at him for some reason, but the force around her was calm, nervous even. He shrugged it off, aquanting it with her training. he hesitated to reply now, not sure what would happen next

"Rey-"

She was just a few feet away not, her cheeks fuming red as she continued

"No, You listen to me you manipulative ass!"

He watched with wide eyes as she reached for the weapon attatched to her hip, bright blue errupting as she held it before her in a defenssive position. He istantly reached for him own weapon, but coming up empty handed. He cursed himself for being so careless to leave it on the ship. Instead he took a calm step back as he spoke

"Easy kid! Put the kriffing saber down!"

Rey waved the modified double edged blade around in her hand as she responded

"Why should I? You murderous snake! I thought you changed, that you finally realized how badly you screwed up!"

When he fell silent, Rey moved in closer to him, shouting feriously

"You killed them."

He stopped dead in his tracks

"What?"

He watched her hesitate briefly before continung to yell at him, weapon raised and getting closer to his throat in the process

"Don't play dumb! You killed my parents! And you had the nerve to tell me they died from addiction. You ripped me apart from the only people who cared about me!"

He watched her feet shift and took advantage of the imbalance in her step as he shot out a hand, twisting her wrist, making her drop the weapon. He watched her wince at the pain, but he was too quick to be phased by it. He reached to the weapon, force pushing it back and away from them so none of them could use to. From the corner of his eye he saw Ava racing towards them. Rey quickly knocked him onto his back. Her eyes were no longer filled with anger as she moved in on him. She looked at him pleedingly, allowing him to get to his knees in front of her.

She called for her weapon through the force, reignighting it and holding it before him, but her eyes were still soft- almost desperate. He grunted, trying to get up, but she had firmly freezed him still in the force. The blue light danced around them as he managed to speak through clenched teeth

"You want to tell me what is going on?"

She looked over her shoulder at Ava who was growing closer by the second. She whispered back, voice filled with apology as she spoke

"I'm sorry. You said to trust you, now you need to trust me."

"Rey-"

He tried desperatly to understand what was happening, but before he knew it a thick metal band locked around his neck and everything went silent. He watched Rey reach for him and ease him down as his body gave out. The force around him ceased to exist and he was left in complete silence. It should have been terrifying and excruciating, but for the first time in his life he felt peace.


	10. Confessional

When he finally came to he was surrounded in darkness. He reached out but there wasn't anything to lock onto. He reached out again desperately trying to find Rey, but he was met with harsh silence. The force was silent for the first time in his life. He should be relieved, he was before, but now he felt only a dull ache in his temples. He shifted around the dark room, trying to find some kind of light switch when he came to a halt. The collar around his neck was now making a strange beeping sound as if it were warning him. He eased his sore muscles further and further until the beeping grew more consistent. As his hand finally met what he assumed was a light switch, the collar caused a strong wave of electricity to corse through him. He dropped to the floor instantly, cursing under his breath as he waited out the electrical shock.

Above him, the lights began to shift, infiltrating the darkness slowly until the room was light again. Squinting his eyes, Ben tried to take in all of his surroundings. He appeared to be in some makeshift supply closet based on the cleaning supplies and used,oily rags. As soon as his muscles stopped twitching, he made a move to get up, that was until the door knob started to move.

Thinking fast through the fog of not having the force to rely on, Ben grasped the handle of a broom, quickly breaking off the bristled end. He then turned to settle in the only empty corner, making sure the broom was close by as the door slowly creaked open. His eyes were closed as he listened for the oncoming footfall. Soft, slow steps were made in his direction after the door was clicked shut. Force, this would be a lot easier if he could hone into the force he thought as he tried to time the perfect time to act. His hand twitched as he felt a figure crouch next to him. He may not have the force to guide him but he had his size and sheer strength to utilize as he shifted the broom in his hand and shot towards the figure.

He grunted as someone kicked him swiftly in the ribs, but he pushed back with vigor until he had them pressed up against the wall, broom handle to throat as they let out a wince. His brown eyes met hazel in a panic as his assailant croaked

"You're still mad at me I see."

He blinked back at her in surprise

"Rey?"

He watched as she comically raised a brow, looking down where his hands held the broom and then looked back up before asking

"Could you please put the broom down?"

He slowly lowered the makeshift weapon, but found it hard to relax given the circumstance he awoke to. He really had no idea what was going on for once and it was very unsettling to him. He had no control.

"Could you tell me what the hell is going on?"

She snapped her head to him, stilling him in place with a sharp glare as she whispered

"Keep your voice down."

Once she was sure he wasn't going to burst out again, she leaned over to pick up a worn satchel bag that had probably dropped during their little situation. He watched as she pulled out some ration bars and a container of something he wasn't sure he wanted to know the contents of. She outstretched her arm to him, offering the objects as she spoke

"Here I brought you something to eat, you're probably starving."

He gladly accepted them, stomach growling in response as he ripped open a bar and took a bite of it. It tasted like cardboard, but he had consumed worse. Plus, he needed to keep his strength up. Between bites, he questioned

"How long have I been out?"

Rey looked down at her interlaced fingers as she responded

"Twenty hours."

He practically spat out the ration bar at that.

"What the-"

He was quickly cut off from sharing the long string of curse words that he had stacking up for a while. However, Rey's chipper accent cut him off before he could manage, shooting him a daring eyebrow as she spoke

"Believe me I tried to wake you up. You're a heavy sleeper."

He raised one eyebrow at her in confusion as he replied

"That's a first."

When she didn't fully get his joke, he moved on, motioning to the device still tightly wrapped around his neck.

"Now would you tell me what is going on and why you forced a force dampener around my neck?"

He watched her shrug it off as if it were a casual occurrence before responding

"I had to make it seem like you were clueless. If I let you in on the plan you would probably end up killing someone.

For the millionth time in the presence of Rey, he was completely lost. What in the world was she even talking about anymore. Maybe all that Jedi training got to her head or something? There had been stories of people who went off the deep end, maybe she did?

"What plan?"

She looked at him as if she heard every word he just thought out loud. She may very well have… wait no. Scratch that. She closed the bond between them. He turned his attention back to her

"We need the location on Snoke. Ava just so happens to be one of his henchmen."

As if trying to find her himself, Ben looked around the small room as he inquired curiously

"Where is she now?"

Rey's lips curved into a smirk as she replied

"In the actual supply closet."

He practically rolled his eyes at that. Truly he liked it when Rey cracked jones with him. It made him feel as if they actually had a friendship, like she didn't hate him for the time being. When he remained silent, She continued, mistaking his silence for anger. Alright, maybe he was a little angry. More irritated than anything. This force dampener was damn uncomfortable and he was starting to itch without the force at his beck and call.

"Look, I tried to tell you, but it had to be me. She already didn't trust you."

He quirked a brow at her in surprise.

"Did you get anything yet?"

He watched Rey as she comically looked over at him, blush tinting her cheeks in the most flattering of ways. Man he really needs to stop staring at her, but he just can't seem to do so. This is detrimental to his own health he knows it. There is no way she would ever trust him again, let alone have feelings for him.

"No. I was hoping you would play bad cop?"

He let out a laugh. An actually laugh out loud, something he hadn't done for years. Come to think of it, when was the last time he actually laughed. Not on the Supremacy that was for sure. Definitely not in the presence of any of those creatures he worked with - or the supreme leader for that matter. Clearing his throat, he finally responded.

"I don't think that will be necessary."

He watched as Rey's expression changed as if she were closing off again. Great, nice job Ben. The point was to get her to like you more, not to push her away.

"Okay, yeah. Bad joke."

He cursed himself for a second before he tried to explain,

"No Rey- I mean I don't think we should go after Snoke. At least not yet. I don't know if we can face him alone."

She looked up at him completely baffled. He allowed himself a small smirk at the clear height difference as she craned her neck to look up at him.

"What do you mean? You did say we were running out of time didn't you?"

His smirk quickly faded as he remembered the brevity of the situation at hand. He continued to explain himself and his actions to the petite Jedi.

"Yes…. but he's not going to be the same as he was before."

Rey's hands shot to her hips

"What do you mean? He's not going to be the same meniacal creep?"

He snorted a moment at Rey's blatant sarcasm before continuing,

"That might be the same, but he's going to be more powerful than before. This might sound crazy, but I think he planned his death from the beginning in order to fit into some grandeur plan."

She turned on him, hands dropping from her hips. She wasn't angry with him? That was a first if he was being honest with himself. It's really only a matter of time before he upsets her. He watched her carefully as she responded,

"Well what do we do now?"

He shifted past her in the small hallway as he made his way towards the cockpit. He replied to her as casually as he could manage

"We dump Ava."

Here we go, he thought to himself as he could practically feel Rey's anger spark, even with the force dampener on.

"Ben she has a daughter."

Turning quickly on his heels, he looked down at her and shot back

"She's a bounty hunter and a very skilled liar."

Man they were like fire and ice. He was beginning to think going after her was a horrible idea with the amount they fought, but who was he kidding. He couldn't live without her. Literally. If the force bond broke, he was as good as dead. That wasn't the only reason though. But he tried to push that other reason aside, it would not help, just cause destruction and chaos. Right now, he focused on Rey's scrunched eyebrows as she defended their new prisoner.

"She wasn't lying! I looked into her mind when she was out cold. Snoke is baiting her too."

He watched her eyes fill with something. She was telling the truth and he believed her. Ben shrugged his shoulders at that as he replied to the fiery brunette

"Then we convince her to join us."

He watched as Rey's expression quickly shifted from anger to surprise. She looked him up and down suspiciously as if he would change his mind. He wasn't going to.

"Really?"

He nodded back, "Yeah."

As he turned around and continued to head back to the cockpit, Rey continued to question,

"That's your plan?"

He was growing irritated now. He hated when people second guessed his intentions because it made him think he made the wrong choice. He grumbled back a quick, "Yeah."

"Hmm"

He stopped at that. He didn't feel like turning around again, but he didn't anyways just to see what on earth she was thinking. Did she still not trust him? Even after he let her clasp a force dampening collar around his neck? Speaking of, this think was starting to itch. He began, "Wh-"

But he was quickly cut off,

"I have to go check on Ava. Maybe we can at least talk some sense into her."

He watched her turn around and head back in the opposite direction. He tried to reach out in the force, but the damn collar was still on. He yelled across the ship, "Rey!"

She turned quickly on her heels, shocked by the sudden outburst

"What?"

He glared daggers at her as he shifted his gaze from the collar to her and back again,

"Would you please take this force forsaken thing off of me?"

He watched her smile widely as she made her way back towards him. When she was closer she began to tease,

"Hmmm…. I could. Or I could just leave it on. It's kind of fun watching you struggle."

When he glared back at her, she aquiessed, shooting her hands up as she worked on the device

"Okay, okay fine. Hold still."

—

Interrogating people was never a strong suit for her. Maybe because she had experience as the person being interrogated or maybe it simply stood against everything she believed, but nevertheless she hated it. Ben was better at this then her, but she doubted he would be able to keep a level head - that he wouldn't end up getting physical. She sighed as she turned the knob on the door. There was no going back now. She entered the room silently, but the trained bounty hunter did not skip a beat. Ava shifted to turn her head at Rey as she questioned grimly,

"What do you want?"

Taking up a single chair, Rey pulled it towards her with the force and sat in front of Ava who was handcuffed to a spare metal pole in the ground.

"I just want to talk."

The young woman turned her head away as if she were expecting Rey to lash out as she replied,

"I'm not telling you anything."

She could feel herself growing more irritated by the moment. She took a deep breathe to calm the fire quelling inside her as she began,

"Look Ava - if that's even your real name - we're on the same side really. And we both know we'd all be better off with Snoke six feet below the surface."

Ava shot back with fire,

"I will not risk the life of my daughter for a pair of force users like you two, let alone the psycopathic murderer."

Rey was quick to act. This she could do. She could easily emphasize with others. She began in a soft voice,

"Your daughter will be fine, I promise you."

She watched as Ava's face crumpled and a tear escaped her.

"I just- She's all I have left."

Rey reached forward, taking up the woman's hand as she reassured

"I understand and I promise you nothing will happen to her."

Ava looked back up at her through teary eyes

"What do you want me to do?"

—

Moments later, when Rey had managed to compose herself, she made her way back into the cockpit where she knew Ben was waiting patiently. As soon as she entered, he shifted in the pilots chair and looked her in the eyes searching for something as he asked,

"What did you get?"

Rey nodded to him as she took a seat in the co-pilot seat next to him

"I think she's on board. As long as we are able to locate and retrieve her daughter."

Ben hesitated a second before continuing

"Where is she?"

She took a deep breathe in and let it out before she managed to say,

"Jakku."

She watched carefully as his massive shoulders dropped and his deep voice softened significantly as he looked down at her

"Rey."

She was starting to grow uncomfortable under his soft gaze

"What?"

When he didn't reply she continued, trying to explain

"I'm fine Ben."

"Then why won't you look at me?"

Her eyes finally lifted up and she was filled with a pain she had grown accustomed to feeling when she remembered the Supremacy. The look on in his eyes was the same, soft and full off emotion.

"Because I'm really trying not to hold what you said about my parents on the Supremacy against you."

His eyes seemed to fill with hurt as he tried to explain himself to her

"I only wanted you to know the truth."

Something inside her had snapped. All the emotion was flooding back now and she could not hold it back as she lashed out at him

"Why? So I could join you? Because you knew I was vulnerable and alone?"

She watched something snap inside of him as he lashed back, but he was not anger. He was full of passion and truth and the way he spoke chilled her down to the core.

"Because I care about you! You kept running around looking for someone to be there for you and no one ever was going to be that for you. I couldn't just sit back and watch you get hurt time after time by people who were undeserving of you to begin with. None of them saw the potential in you - they all underestimated you and I couldn't take it anymore!"

Speechless. She was utterly speechless. When she finally found her voice it was soft and barely above a whisper,

"Ben."

He turned his back to her as he spoke

"Set course for Jakku. I'll take care of retrieving Ava's daughter, you just make sure we get there in one piece."

She blinked away the tears that were beginning to form as she croaked out,

"You would do that for me?"

He turned back towards her, brown eyes meeting hers

"Yes."

She bagan, "Ben I-"

He quickly cut her off, his eyes briefly shifting the the dog tag around her neck as he spoke

"Look you should probably get some rest. I'll get everything ready."

She was caught off guard. Especially after that declaration. Maybe he just needed time? She simply nodded, trying not to sound hurt

"Okay, yeah."

He began to walk away, but she wasn't ready to see him leave just yet. Not with out saying something.

"Ben?"

He turned his head back behind him to look at her. Dark locked spilling inside his eyes as he looked at her expectantly. She gave him a small smile as she continued,

"Thanks."

—

When she was sure Ben was out of earshot, she pulled out the device she had concealed on her and quickly typed out her message

"General we had a bit of a delay, but I think I'm starting to get somewhere with him. I'll send the rest of the information in a holo attachment. Rey."


	11. So What About the Hutt?

Rey had awaken abruptly when she felt the ship come out of hyperdrive. Her sleep had been restless to say the least, nervous anticipation getting the best of her. Her dreams had been laden with past memories and awful nightmares of her time on Jakku. To make matters worse, she couldn't seem to get the image of her parents - or rather what she thought her parents looked like - out of her head. She had pictured them calling to her across the deserted waste land, drunk and stumbling over their own feet. She would cry out, but no one would come to her aid. She was alone again, tears streaming down her face as Unkar Plutt dragged her away. There was a passing feeling of someone wiping her tears and pulling her into an embrace, but she had awoken to the jolt of hyperspace. Peeling the thick blanket away, she made her way out of the living quarters and into the living space, then past that to the cockpit where she found a disheveled Ben Solo flipping at switches and steering the ship towards the planet that had haunted her dreams just moments ago. For a moment she wondered if he even heard her come in, her footfall was almost silent at times. She recalled one time when she had surprised Poe, causing him to spill a hot cup of Caff down his shirt. She smiled for a moment at the memory before Ben's voice cut through and the memory of the cock-sure pilot disappeared around her.

"We should be landing anytime now."

Stepping fully into the cock pit now, she eyed the giant of a man sitting casually in the pilot's seat, easily dwarfing the chair with his height. Her eyes did a quick scan of him, disheveled raven hair and all. He looked like he had stayed up all night flying and plotting their next course of action. Something inside her heart ached at the memory of Han. In his state of dishevelment, Ben looked like the spitting image of a young Han Solo. She let the thought dissipate as she spoke up, clearing her throat along the way.

"You piloted all night?"

She watched him carefully as he hummed a response, flicking one final switch before he leaned back in the seat. She caught a glimpse of his face that wasn't shielded by loose strands of his hair. When was the last time he had cut his hair she thought to herself, but then focused on the circles under his deep chocolate eyes. A clear answer to her question.

"Do you need anything?"

He hesitated for a second before turning to face her, running a hand through his hair to try and tame it.

"Would you take the gears? I'm going to go get ready for landing."

She simply nodded, moving to take up his seat as he shifted out of the way. She had made herself comfortable when he turned around and asked through the arch of the cock pit.

"Ava knows the location of the people her daughter is working for?"

Rey nodded before she realized he wouldn't have seen it. She spoke up

"She should."

They were getting closer and closer to their destination by the minute. The closer they got, the harder it was for Rey to deal with the anxiety the place had elected from her. She barely heard Ben's response.

"Good. That'll make thing a little easier."

When she didn't reply, he tried again. His voice soft as he spoke

"Rey?"

Snapping out of her weird state, she turned in the chair to face him

"Yeah?"

His features were soft and there was a flicker of worry in his eyes as he looked down at her.

"Are you sure you're going to be okay staying here by yourself?"

She brushed it off, shrugging her shoulders in response.

"I'll be fine. I've survived worse."

He practically rolled his eyes at her response. Did he really just roll his eyes. She smirked slightly at how much he was beginning to open up to her and show glimpses of what she assumed the real Ben Solo was like deep down. She raised her eyebrows in question, prompting him to continue.

"That's not what I meant."

He mouth opened to respond to him, but she was quickly caught off guard by the female voice that spoke out instead.

"You're not going?"

Both Ben and Rey shifted their bodies to the voice. Ava emerged, looking like she hadn't slept a wink. Rey thought there was something different about her. She didn't seem to be the intimidating bounty hunter that was scarred with her victories. Now she seemed to be a worried mother, and all Rey wanted to do was get her daughter back for her. Ben responded to the woman, his voice not nearly as soft as it had been moments ago when he was speaking with her.

"Ava, we are just about to land."

She barely let Ben finish before she pushed past him to sit in the co-pilot's chair, big eyes looking to Rey's as she practically pleaded.

"Rey you have to go."

Ben was quick to respond, not wanting Rey to have to explain why she wouldn't be joining them.

"She stays. This one is going to have to be just us."

Ava shot an annoyed look over her shoulder in Ben's direction as she spat out.

"I'm not going anywhere with him."

There was that nasty bounty hunter attitude again. Rey almost let a laugh escape as she watched Ben's jaw tighten. She set her hazel eyes on him as she replied to Ava.

"He promised he wouldn't bite."

Ava practically groaned at that, her eyes rolling in exaggeration as she explained

"His promises mean nothing to me. Anyways, the gang will recognize me. I used to work under them until Snoke managed to get me away. Unfortunately he wasn't able to recover my daughter."

Ben responded immediately, his tone slightly irritated as he spoke.

"So we get you a mask."

Ava was standing now to face him, the two glared daggers at each other while Rey sat in amusement. She wondered if this is how people felt when her and Ben argued or if it was just comical because of the fact that a small woman was holding her ground against the former supreme leader.

"Of course you would recommend that. Even if I do wear a mask I will not pretend to be your wife."

Ben's mouth practically dropped at that

"My what?"

Rey was equally surprised, moving her gaze back over to Ava, asking for an explanation

"Your wife. The only way someone retrieves a child from the Hutts is if you are in a position of power or if you are a wealthy couple who seems interested in adopting. Unfortunately for us, everyone now knows that supreme leader Kylo Ren fled the first order."

There was a moment of silence between the three before Rey broke it, standing up as she replied

"I'll go."

Ben's eyes darted to hers, his face dropping as he began

"Rey-"

But she was quicker, holding a hand out to him as she reassured

"It's okay Ben. Like Ava said, they would recognize her which means they would shoot to kill. At least if we do it this way, no one will recognize us and if they do it would be me. I guess there are some perks to being a nobody."

His eyes refused to leave her while she spoke

"Are you sure?"

She swallowed the lump in her throat at the thought of returning to the desert, but she pushed the feeling aside. This was her mission. She was a Jedi Knight now. Emotion was not supposed to set her back. She would go on this mission because it was the right thing to do. She would go for Ava. For Ava's daughter. She cleared her throat, willing it not to crack as she whispered

"As sure as I'll ever be."

With that said, Ben looked her over one more time as if making sure she was sure before he pointed towards Ava.

"What are we going to do with her?"

Ava's frown deepened and her voice raised as she grumbled

"I'm still here you know?"

Ben continued anyways, regardless of what the young bounty hunter had to say

"I don't trust her to stay here alone on the ship with free range."

"I trust her. We could put a dampener on the controls of the Falcon if it will make you feel better, but I think she will stay put."

—

After they had landed and decided on a course of action, they raided the Falcon in search of something to wear that would help them get into character. Ava ended up making a deal with some shop keepers and brought back some richly colored materials. Rey was adorned in a long black dress that held an intricate pattern weaved within the tick material with a thick midnight blue fur cape over the top with was held together with silver beading. Ava had twisted her hair into some kind of braid at the back of her head and clipped on sapphire jewels to her ears. There was a matching sapphire necklace around her neck. The final touch was a delicate silver band around her ring finger. She found it absolutely absurd to wear such apparel in an excruciatingly hot desert, but Ben had insisted on it, especially if they wanted to go unnoticed. She tried not to smudge the charcoal coloring that was painted around her eyes. She had seem images through the holonet of women dressed in such things, but she had never seen men dressed as elegantly as Ben was now.

When he stepped out she expected him to look completely absurd, much like she felt, but he was the epitome of regal. He seemed like he belonged in a chair in the senate or even in a leadership position. He was dressed up in all black, much like her, with a deep blue velvet cape around his shoulders. He has a silver metal piece around his neck, which highlighted the curve of his jaw. On his left hand was a matching metal band, thicker than hers, but nearly identical. A small part of her filled with warmth at the sight.

Now they were strolling through the desert, trying to avoid the glares of other wealthy residents. Rey had matched Ben's step as they walked side by side. She leaned in closer as she whispered

"Why do we have to dress like this again? I mean we look ridiculous."

Ben looked at her with a small smirk on his lips as he replied in a whisper

"We have to convince them we are a wealthy couple."

Rey tried not to roll her eyes as she shifted uncomfortably in the tight dress. The open neck line made for less heat, but she was incredibly uncomfortable with the exposure. She tried to pull it up, her hand getting stuck on the fur of her cape as she tried. She grunted in annoyance before grumbling.

"Where did you even find this fur cape?"

Ben looked down at her for a second before looking back up, a slight blush on his cheeks as he replied

"My uncle Lando used to keep some capes for emergencies. He was super into fashion. I was never a big fan."

Rey shifted again in the dress

"Not going to argue with that. We look like we are going to perform."

Ignoring her discomfort, Ben changed the conversation

"Have you ever delt with the Hutts before?"

She replied honestly

"No. I knew how to keep a low profile."

She heard him snort next to her before he spoke again

"Then I apologize in advance."

Her eyebrows raised as they came to a stop outside of a large building. Part of her thought nothing would be as bad as watching master Luke drink blue milk, but she had a bad feeling in the pit of her stomach

"Why?"

Ben shot her a glare as he responded dryly

"You'll see."

They entered the building just as a scarcely clad women exited, giving Ben a sultry smirk on the way. Rey followed her with her eyes, annoyed by how blatantly she had ogled him with her eyes. However, Ben didn't so much as glance at the woman which made Rey raise an eyebrow. He rolled his eyes at her before looking down at her hand. Her stomach dropped for a second as he reached for her hand and held it in his own. She expected his hands to be rough and strong, but they were soft and gentle. She nodded at him before he led them into the building where they were greeted by some sort of nasty looking creature Rey had never seen before which was surprising considering she had spoken and seen over one hundred different species. The man spoke in what she assumed was Hutesse.

"Whooh bal jee-jee doo wata?" Who do we have here

She found the language familiar, but couldn't follow what the creature was saying. She raised another brow when Ben responded fluently

"Aurrius Nire an bu Mrs." Aurrius Nire and the Mrs.

She nudged him as she whispered in amusement

"You speak Hutesse?'

He looked down at her, a sad look distant in his eyes as he replied

"When you're raised on the Mellinium Falcon, you pick up a few things."

He turned back to the creature

"Jee wish speak uta-sha kajidii" I wish to speak to your leader

The creature seemed hesitant, eying the both of them up and down as if questioning their belonging. Rey doubted the security would let them in until Ben dropped her hand and fished through his pockets until he produced a large sum of credits and flashed them to the man. The creature nodded with a grunt as he a accepted the credits and made an arm gesture for them to enter. The room they entered was lavish in deep velvety reds and silky purples. There were foreign and exotic decorations ornamenting the walls and floors, half naked statues and other hand crafted pieces that must have been worth a fortune. It took Rey a moment to compose herself, trying to stay in character as best as she could. When she had fallen behind, Ben stalled and reached out for her, offering his hand for her to take. Grasping his hand felt foreign, especially since she had always been so hesitant with physical contact, but they had to convince their hosts that they were very much a married couple.

As they faced a Beaded curtain, the creature motioned for them continue their path inside. Ben quickly moved his hand from Rey's hand to the small of her back to lead her in as he moved the beads out of the way. When they entered Rey noticed two scarcely clad women who were surely already gawking Ben. She glanced quickly to Ben who seemed oblivious to the women beside him, his eyes set on something in the center of the room instead. Her eyes shifted to follow what he was looking at. In the center of the room sat a large sluggish creature. They stood firmly as the Hutt looked them up and down, taking an especially long time looking at her before he spoke.

"Haku seel jee bal uba?" What can I do for you?

Ben bowed his head briefly before speaking. She couldn't help noticing how he was able to add such elegance to the otherwise ugly language. He usually hid it pretty well, but she was beginning to see more of Leia in him then she ever thought was possible. She watched him in amazement as he gestured towards her and himself, taking advantage of time to look at how well he cleaned up. Ben was a handsome man, she had to admit - at least he was when he wasn't throwing fits and scoffing at everything she said.

"Myo wife um mee were interested noleeya adopting. Jee-jee heard u had an excellent display tah choose tuta." My wife and I were interested in adopting. We heard you had an excellent display to choose from.

She turned her attention back to the Hutt who was still glaring at her, refusing to look anywhere else as he responded.

"U're wife sa nopa interested noleeya having do child of cheekta own gee u? She could have do job unko um get doe attention she craves da u can nopa supply." You're wife is not interested in having a child of her own with you? She can get a job here and get the attention she craves that you can not supply.

Rey felt a chill course through her as she watched Ben's jaw tighten and his fists clench. He wasn't happy with whatever the Hutt was saying, and judging by the way the creature was looking at her she knew it had something to do with her.

"She would make wompa thousand credits per person." She would make one thousand credits per person

Ben's fists clenched even harder, she had to curl her arm around one of his hands to get him to ignore what the Hutt had told him. She understood some of what was happening. The damn Hutt was trying to buy her. She quelled her own anger at the creature, expertly concealing it. It wouldn't do them any good to have too hot headed force users in the same room. She stuck to her character, leaning closer into Ben till he snapped out of it.

Come spin dee boonkee girl. "Come spin around girl."

But the Hutt continued, even gesturing with his arm in a circular motion as if telling her to do a spin for him. She was disgusted, but she kept a lid on her anger, it wouldn't be the first time she has been cat called or treated in such a way. She was used to it, but Ben was definitely not. She saw the moment he snapped, taking a step forward and glaring daggers at the Hutt as he lifted a hand at the creature.

"U lay do hand on myo wife um mee will personally stuka tah doe destruction of this ring um all of do clients. Myo wife sa nopa interested noleeya doe pleasure service. If u are nopa able tah show us doe children jee-jee will take our credits um make do bargon gee do more willing dealer." You lay a hand on my wife and I will personally see to the destruction of this ring and all of it's clients. My wife is not interested in the pleasure service. If you are not able to show us the children we will take our credits and make a deal with a more willing dealer.

She watched as the Hutt's eyes grew wide before he gave Ben a nod as if accepting something. She briefly wondered if he had used the force to convince the man, but she would have felt it if she had. She was actually rather surprised that he had not used the force.

"Ree well, mee will koose u doe children." Very well. I will bring the children.

The Hutt had gestures to the guard who had allowed them in to begin with. The gaurs had nodded and left back through the beaded curtain. Rey took this time to piece things together, bending in closer to Ben as she whispered

"What did he say?"

She could tell was still working through some of the anger he had pent up. His response was void of any emotion as he whispered back

"He will show us the children."

She raised an eyebrow at him

"What about everything else?"

He managed a glance down at her, letting out a sigh as he responded

"It took a little extra to get him to show us the children."

—

Ben's head snapped the second he heard the curtains shift again. He needed to get out of this place before he ripped someone's head off. The things the Hutt had said about Rey disgusted him. It took all of his will power not to unleash on these creatures. He tried ever harder to conceal his disgust when the children were brought in, clad in chains, and collars. They looked dirty and miserable as if they hadn't slept in months. He took a deep breath before whispering to Rey

"Do any of these look like Ava's?"

He watched as she pointed to one at the end. A young girl, about ten, whose blonde hair was pulled back into a bun. She had a bruise on her right cheek and a slight split lip.

"The one on the far right. The blonde."

Ben quickly moved forward, pointing to the girl as he addressed the Hutt again.

"This one will do. How many credits?"

The Hutt looked smug as he responded calmly

"Fifty thousand."

He heard Rey practically choke next to him at the price. The Hutt were known for being swindlers, but he wasn't one to get swindled. He knew all the tricks in the book.

"Surely she is not worth that much. She is so young. Twenty will do."

Nevertheless, the Hutt tried again

"Forty."

Ben held firm, his voice dropped into the calm tone he used for mind tricks. He looked dead into the creatures eyes as he prodded with the force.

"Twenty or we leave."

Loud laughter filled the air as the Hutt looked between the two of them. He laughed for a good while before he spoke again

"Your mind tricks do not work here Jedi. You're not very wise coming here, especially when your face is plastered everywhere, Kylo Ren."

His stomach dropped suddenly. Rey's head snapped over to him as if asking what they should do next, but it was too late

"Shit."

His side was hit by an electric wand, bringing him to his knees. The same was done to Rey, falling to her knees as well.

"Take them to the pit. Throw the girl in with them."

—

Rey fought back, maneuvering herself out of her fur cape and the guards hands as she made a break towards the girl. Ben's voice broke through as he pleaded with the creature

"Leave the girl. She has nothing to do with this."

Rey quickly bent down in front of the girl, trying to find a way to break the chains off as she spoke

"Thea?"

The girl's voice came of raspy as if she had been screaming. Rey flinched at the thought.

"How do you know my name?"

A sharp shock hit her between the shoulders before she could respond to the girl. She watched as Thea was released from her chains and dragged along with them. Ben had about four guards on him as they hauled them into some dark secluded area. As soon as Rey gained her strength again, she spoke to the girl in a hushed tone

"My name is Rey. This is Ben. We are here to rescue you."

Thea gave her a look as if to say 'are you serious' as she responded dryly

"You're doing a great job so far."

If they had any doubts that this was Ava's child, that response just about made it clear. Rey shot a look at Ben who was smirking slightly before she responded to the young girl

"Sorry, we are doing a favor for you mother."

That got her attention. Thea's head snapped to Rey quickly, eyes filling with tears as she questioned

"My mom is alive?"

Rey gave her a slight smile

"Yes. We just need to get you out of here and then you can see her."

A loud growl filled the space around them.

"What was that?"

The guards had stalled, stopping them right in front of a caged off area that looked almost like a jungle. Seconds later the guards were pushing them through forcefully and slamming the cages doors shut behind them. They were in some type on enclosure, thick bars boxing them in from all angles. The space was roomy, but humid compared to the hallway they were just in. Another growl echoed through the space causing Thea to jump. Rey shot Ben a cautionary look before turning to the girl. She bent down on one knee as she looked into the girl deep green eyes.

"Thea, I need you to find somewhere dark and don't move until one of us comes."

Rey watched as Ben discarded his cape and handed it to Thea along with the chunk of metal he previously had around his neck. She noticed he had bent it so it came to a sharp point. He simply nodded to Thea as if telling her to stay in place before he looked back to Rey. She looked back at the girl one last time before following Ben into the thick foliage. Her long dress dragging on the dirty floor as she ripped the necklace and earring off. She carefully bent down as ripped the dress until it was knee length and she could move more freely. Ben looked down at her in amusement before quietly signaling her to follow his lead. He only turned back to her briefly as a chill ran down her spine.

"Can you feel it?"

She nodded back, trying to remain silent. They had no idea what they were dealing with, but she did not have a good feeling about it. They made their way deeper into the jungle, sweat dripping down their necks now as they inched closer and closer to what they felt in the force. Without warning a giant cat-like creature sprung out from a far bush, moving fast at the pair. They moved quickly, both centering themselves within the force as they prepared for battle. They stood across from each other now, the creature in the middle. Eye contact was not enough, she needed to communicate with him, know what he was going to do so she could compliment his moves. Thinking quickly, she reached for him through the bond, opening the door that had been slammed shut between them for years now. She was instantly flooded with his thoughts and his head snapped up to her. He looked at her in shock and awe, but the moment was cut short when the creature started sprinting in her direction.

Head towards the trees, I'll cut it off.

Rey followed his command, sprinting towards the trees. As she reached an especially tall one, she began to climb crossing her fingers that Ben would intercept it before she figured out if it could climb or not. She watched as Ben took it on, a large branch in his hands as he fended off the creature. Jumping down from the tree, Rey took up the rear of the creature. Her hands clasped around the necklace that she had surprisingly held onto instead of tossing on the ground like she did with the earrings. Taking a running start, Rey leaped, flipping onto the back of the feline as she attempted to wrap the necklace around it's neck. The whole move backfired when the necklace caught the creatures mouth instead.

Lashing back, the creature managed to knock Rey off it's back. Ben made a quick move to block it, but was instead met with a large swat to the back ripping through his back. She heard him scream out at the pain as she was forced on her back, the feline now on top of her. Incisors nearing her face as the animal hissed at her. Just as it was preparing for the kill, it was lifted off the ground and flung across the open space. She watched as Ben dove at the animal and quickly snapped it's neck in the flick of a wrist.

She sat looking over to him in fear as she tried to catch her breath. Her eyes traced over the outline of deep gashed over the spanse of his large back. That had to hurt, she thought to herself before realizing that the bond was still open. He brought his attention back to her, rushing towards her. For a moment she though he would strike her down like he did the creature, but instead he crouched over her looking deep into her eyes. His deep brown eyes scanning her hazel ones for any signs of pain before he reached out a hand towards her and helped her up off the ground. His breathing was still heavy as he caught her by the waist to steady her

"Are you okay?"

She simply nodded, not breaking eye contact as she found her voice again

"Are you?"

She watched him carefully. Surely he had to be in excruciating pain right about now, but she also assumed the adrenaline was still coursing through him. He nodded to her in response

"I'm fine. Let's go get Thea."

—

By the time they had made it out of that force forsaken cage and back to the Falcon, both Rey and Ben were exhausted and covered in a layer of blood, sweat and dirt. They were ready to collapse when they were met with Ava again. They watched as the woman glanced over them and then quickly to the small girl between them. Her eyes filled as she sprinted towards them

"Thea!"

Tea let out a shriek as she leaped towards her mother and into her open arms

"Mom!"

The two force users watched as the pair was reunited. Rey's heart filled with the scene before them. Felt a strange sense of fulfillment as she watched the mother pepper her daughter with kisses. Part of her ached with the memory of hoping she would have a similar reunion, but she was well past that now. Blinking tears away, she smiled down at the family.

"Oh my sweet girl I missed you so much! Look at you!"

Ava turned to the pair, eyes streaming with tears and she looked into their eyes and whispered

"Thank you."

The two of them simply nodded and made a ,move to get onto the ship, giving the mother and daughter time to themselves. As soon as they were safely inside, Rey turned her attention back to Ben who looked deathly pale. Her senses kicked into overdrive as she moved to help him walk. She tried to reach though the bond, but was quickly pushed out. She looked back at him in surprise. He managed to grunt out a response

"Dont. Want you…. To feel…. This."

She was instantly aware of how bad the injury was . His shirt, although black, was drenched in blood and the gashes on his back were dangerously deep.

"Can you make it to the table? I'll get the med kit."

When he nodded, she moved to retrieve the med kit that was in the cockpit. When she returned Ben was laying on the table, minus a shirt. His eyes were closed and there was a scary looking pool of blood around him. Surely he wasn't dead? She would have felt that through the bond. She moved to his side in a flurry, taking a stool so she didn't pass out herself with exhaustion.

"Ben stay with me now."

His head tilted to the side to look at her, his eyes opening just a sliver as he spoke

"I'm fine Rey, it's just a lot of blood."

She let out a small laugh at that. The large beast of a man in front of her was afraid of blood? Her smile grew wider at the thought

"The mighty Kylo Ren is afraid of a little blood."

She moved quickly to clean the wound and to put the batch patches on. She continued to smirk as he responded in a snarky tone

"That is a lot of blood and it's all mine."

As soon as she placed the last patch on, she began to wipe up the deep crimson pool around him.

"This bacta should help."

As she cleaned up the mess, she caught him starting to sit up from the corner of her eye. She shot him a lethal glare as if to tell him not to mess up the expert work she had just accomplished.

"Hand me that bottle of pills."

Her fingers brushed across the white bottle in the med kit before grading it and tossing it towards him. She watched as he ripped open the bottle and swallowed practically a handful of the small purple pills without any water. He then caught her eyes with his, dark hair plastered to his face as he spoke again, voice raspy

"Could you help me to my chambers? Those will kick in fast and I don't really want to fall asleep on the table"

She moved to help him stand, hoping she could at least use the force to keep him up.

"What did you take?'

He walked alongside her slowly, one arm around her shoulder, the other against the walls of the Falcon so he wouldn't crush her completely. When he responded, his voice was already slurred

"A powerful sedative for the pain."

She shot him a concerned look, but he was already feeling the effects. His eyes were blurred over and he was beginning to get heavier. She managed to dump him onto his cot before he was completely out. She made sure he wasn't on his back, but rather on his stomach to avoid messing up the patches and reopening his wounds. His dark mop of black hair was covering his face and he suddenly looked ten years younger. She crouched down beside him to push the hair away. Admiring how vulnerable he was for once. He always exuded dominance and power, it was almost strange to see him so weak and practically drunk. She let out a laugh at the thought of a drunk Kylo Ren. After securing his hair behind one of his large ears, she made a move to leave, but was stopped as one of his large hands wrapped around her wrist. She turned back, crouching again so she wouldn't fall over. That was when he reached out for her face. His hand cupped her jaw tenderly and he nearly pulled her closer. Her breath caught in her throat as he opened his eyes and looked into her own. A goofy smile brushed across his lips as he whispered in the softest of whispers

"Thank you."

She was caught completely off guard. His hand was warm against her jaw as he held it there. The seemed to breath in unison as their eyes met. She wanted so desperately to lean forward and see how soft his lips really were, but his eyes had rollback and his hand went limp with sleep before she could even try. She shook the absurd thought from her head before it overtook her. Without a second glance, she made her way out of his chambers and back into the main hub


	12. Don't Blink

When he came too again he was in excruciating pain. He had felt pain before - especially under his time with Snoke - but nothing was as mobilizing as he felt right now. Before he would concentrate the pain into anger and thus giving him power, but even he was too weak to try that at the moment. His body simply wouldn't allow for it, neither would Rey for that matter. She would be extremely disappointed. A wave of nausea flew over him in a second, his body growing flush as his stomach lurched. He managed to stand, slowly making it to the door to the refresher when he lost the contents of his stomach. Wiping his hand with the back of his mouth, Ben carefully sat back, leaning his head against the cold metal interior of the ship as he tried to calm his racing heart. His hair was plastered to his forehead with thick layer of sweat. He tried to get it out of the way but it kept sticking to him in some capacity. For a brief second he considered shaving his head, but remembered his rather embarrassingly large ears that hid beneath his thick waves. Instead he reached for a tie the was sitting neatly on the counter and tied half of it up and out of his face.

He felt a chill run down his spine at a long lost memory , or rather a memory he tried to erase from memory. The scene he was in right now reminded him all too much of the time he suffered from a rather intense bout of space sickness as a young boy. He remembered Han had tried to pull off some ridiculous route in the Falcon and succeeded, but when they landed, Ben was horribly ill. Leia had stayed with him the whole time, rubbing soothing circles into his back with her delicate fingers as she cursed Han under her breath. She had even tied his hair up and out of his face. She tried to convince him to let her braid it, stating that it would hold better, but he refused vehemently. He tried to push away the thought as another wave of nausea struck him. He expelled whatever else he had in his stomach before trying to relax again against the wall.

His body was weak, weaker than he had ever felt before. Being crammed in the tiny refresher definitely didn't help anything, especially when he was as tall as he was. He cursed his father for his height as he tried to shift sho his legs weren't bent at odd angles. The injury on his back was practically screaming bloody murder at him for getting out of bed, but he had no choice. He wondered if he would even be able to make it back to his chambers. It was only across the hall, but he felt his eyelids begin to grow heavy. He was exhausted. It must be the middle of the night, he thought, judging by the lights on in the hall and the silence surrounding him. He grimaced as his shirt rubbed against the fiery wound along his back. When had he managed to get a shirt on? He cursed himself as he reached to take the shirt off. He was able to reach pretty far considering his injury, which he assumed cut deep into muscle, but not far enough. Ben cursed loud this time - something in a foreign language - as he kicked the counter.

He was running his hands down his face when he heard the refresher door crack open followed by a sleepy looking Rey. Her hair was loose around her shoulders, but sticking up in random spaces. Her eyes looked bloodshot, and her voice came out in a hoarse whisper

"Ben?"

That's when he looked up at her fully. Her eyebrows were scrunched together, a concerned look playing on her face as she moved to crouch down next to him.

"Are you okay? You should be in bed."

He practically rolled his eyes at that. He was about to make a snarky comeback, but he wasn't sure if he could put up a fight right now if he was being honest with himself. Instead he rested his head back against the wall and grumbled his response.

"Yeah I should, but my stomach had other ideas."

He watched as Rey nodded, looking over him for a second before standing up and filling a small cup full of water. She handed it to him carefully as if he would drop it. He accepted it thankfully, downing the whole thing in one gulp.

"What do you need me to do?"

The pain ripping through him was growing by the minute. His jaw was clenched and his eyes shut tight as he tried to ride out the burning sensation. He didn't mean to be so rude, really it was endearing that she was willing to help his sorry ass in the middle of the night, but the pain in his back made it impossible to keep a level head at the moment.

"I need you to leave me alone."

He watched as Rey scoffed at him, her arms crossing over her chest as she looked him dead in the eyes.

"Ben, you can't just sleep on the refresher floor."

When he didn't respond, she knelt down next to him. His eyes were closed again as he rode out another wave of searing pain and intense nausea. Her fingers rubbed his shoulder gently as she whispered.

"Do you need more pain killers? I can help you back to bed."

He was only able to grunt one word at a time. He tried to keep the hostility out of his voice as he could feel the dark energy surrounding him. He held it back as he groaned back

"Pain killers. Grab the whole bottle."

When he opened his eyes again, Rey's petite form was edging him up off the ground. Her shoulder pushing under his arm pit to help with the process. He tried to muster all the strength he had left to get back to his chambers. He didn't want to crush Rey in the process. She pulled him along with surprising strength

"Come on."

They eventually made it back to his room, almost slipping in the process, but somehow they had made it without killing each other. Although there were a few muttered curses, mainly from Rey. He was now laying down on his cot, trying to wait as patiently as he could for Rey to return with the meds. She rounded the corner quickly, breathing hard as she popped open the bottle and poured two pills into her hand. She handed them out to him along with a cup of water

"Okay, here."

He raised an eyebrow at her, looking between the bottle and the few pills she had in her hand. She took out one more and offered it to him again. He was past reason now. They pain was consuming him alive. He could tell Rey was growing angry with him as she grumbled back

"I'm not giving you the whole bottle! I don't want to have to explain to the general why you overdosed."

That got him to shut up. Any mention of his parents was not up for discussion and she knew that. Smart girl. She shot him a knowing smirk and continued

"Now do you need anything else?"

After swallowing the pills, he tried to get comfortable. The darn things would kick in soon, but he still couldn't fight the uncomfortable feeling of his T-shirt rubbing against the wound. He carefully cleared his throat as he replied

"Can you help me take this shirt off? It's fucking killing me."

Her eyes widened for a second followed by a slight blush to her cheeks before she nodded

"Yeah"

She helped him into a seated position before slowly lifting the dark shirt off and over his head. A chill ran down his back at the coolness of the room but also from the lingering eyes on his chest. Her eyes quickly shifted to take a look at his back when he heard a gasp. Turning his head, he tried to make sense of what could possibly cause that sort of reaction

"What?"

She eyed him carefully before looking back into his eyes again

"Your wound isn't closing."

His head was swimming. This was the last thing he needed right now. The pain killers were slowly beginning to kick in as he slurred back

"How bad is it?"

Rey's eyes darted between his back and his face before she quickly replied

"It's not that bad."

He rolled his eyes, the medication making him more dramatic than usual. He groaned before giving his response

"Rey."

She took a deep breath before responding truthfully

"Okay it's pretty bad."

He was starting to feel the full effect of the medicine now. His pain was diminished, but he was still hot all over. Turning back to Rey, he grabbed her wrist

"Grab the bacta and dump the whole bottle on it if you have to."

He watched her hold back a smirk at that, but quickly tuned serious again when she looked at his face. Her hand shot out to check his temperature with the back of his hand before falling to cup his cheek.

"Ben, you don't look so good."

Her hand was so warn against his cheek, so soft and comforting. His lips started to curl up into what he assumed was the goofiest grin he's ever given to someone. He blamed the drugs heavily for what came out of his mouth next

"Thanks sweetheart."

He watched Rey practically choke out a laugh as she removed her hand from his cheek and slowly helped him to lay back down in his bed. She had slathered a layer of bacta followed by numbing patches to try to ease his pain. He was just thankful Rey was the one seeing him like this, seeing him so vulnerable. He hated feeling like this, but he would hate it even more if someone like Armitage Hux was in his presence. That little weasel. His eyes followed her through the dark as she grabbed a chair from the corner of the room and moved it to the edge of the bed before she looked back at him again.

"Why don't you get some rest? I'll keep an eye on you."

He couldn't control himself anymore. He had no filters, and he knew he would be embarrassed later, but right now he was enjoying her company all too much.

"Mmm I'd like that."

Hazel eyes widened quickly before she readjusted in her chair, scooting closer to him as she leaned in and whispered

"Go to sleep before you say something you'll regret."

Her eyes sparkled. Maybe he was seeing things now, but that's the only way he could describe it. Even after everything he has put her through, she still didn't fully hate him. He felt it deep down, through the connection that she still hadn't closed. She cared more than she let on. Her being up in the middle of the night with a grumpy ex-supreme leader and tormentor confirmed that. Looking at her then, in the darkness of the room, her face was all he could see. That's why he made the choice to be honest, even if the drugs did most of the talking for him

"The only thing I regret is leaving you alone for the last three years."

—

Her heart stopped. Her heart had actually stopped. After his revelation Ben had passed out from exhaustion she figured, but her heart was still pounding. Had he really just confessed his feelings towards her? Would he really have left the First Order to be with her for the last few years? What would have happened between them? This was crazy! She needed to relax. As much as she tried, she couldn't calm down. Part of her accepted his confession and agreed. She really wanted to be able to admit to herself that she shared something deep with Ben Solo, something that ran deeper than just a force bond. She wanted to be able to tell him that she missed him too. That she hoped he would have joined her, as crazy as it sounded. She knew one thing for certain, she needed him in her life. He wasn't going anywhere again. He wasn't going to get off so easy this time.

She was just about ready to march back into his room and wait for him to wake up so she could spew her realizations to him, but her comm quickly beeped on her wrist. She had an incoming call? Fearing it was Leia, Rey made her way to the cockpit where no one would be able to hear. She made her way over to the pilot's chair and kicked her legs up on the panel before answering. Little did she know it was holovid chat. She was even more surprised to she Poe Dameron's face light up out of the device.

"Poe?"

She thought she was surprised, but the look on Poe's face said he was just as surprised. He practically jumped out of his seat when he saw her.

"Rey? You answered! I'm so glad to see you're in one piece! You are in one piece right?"

Not that she wasn't happy to see Poe, but she was hoping it would be Leia who popped up on the comm.

"I thought you were Leia. I'm fine, but I can't say the same for Ben."

She knew she shouldn't have mentioned him as soon as the words left her mouth. Poe's eyes grew large and he leaned in closer as if inspecting her for any scrapes or bruises.

"What do you mean? What happened? Are you hurt? What did he do?I swear if he touched you-"

Rey sighed, waving a hand at him to signal she was fine as she explained.

"I'm fine Poe, really! We just had a little scuffle with some Hutt's guard dog. Ben got the worst of it. I don't know what do do Poe. He's not in good shape."

Really she shouldn't be telling him anything. Leia was very specific about only communicating with her, but she trusted Poe enough. He had given her his dog tag after all. And it was absolutely endearing at the time, but now it didn't seem as important. Not when she had Ben back.

"The Hutt's? Rey, where are you?"

She rolled her eyes at him as she whispered back

"You know I can't tell you that."

The man projected before her sighed as he ran a hand through his perfect hair.

"I know, but if you're in trouble. I can come get you."

Rey gave a sigh of her own back. She felt guilty for leaving without explanation, but she had no other choice. Ben had lured her out and now she had him aboard her ship. She looked at Poe seriously as she tried to explain

"Don't be mad. I had to leave, I had no other choice."

He looked back at her as if she were crazy as he began to protest

"Why would I be mad? I'm just glad you're safe! You are safe right?"

She ducked her head a little as she replied, hiding a smirk at the way he kept repeating himself.

"I left without saying anything."

Poe's eyes never drifted from her during the whole conversation. He kept looking at her like he was surprised she was still alive

"I know and I was mad at first, but…. Z'gag! Actually, we might have a bit of a problem."

She smirked a little at Poe's blatant curse. She had no idea he spoke other languages.

"What do you mean?"

She watched as Poe went through a series of dramatic gesticulations

"I sent Finn and Rose after you. They were supposed to find you, but I think they may have gotten in some deep bantha fodder. Also…. Leia doesn't know."

She should have expected as much. Poe always had to play the hero, she should have known that by now. He always jumped at the first chance to save a life, especially if it was someone he cared about. She just hated feeling like a damsel. She was anything but that. She could definitely hold her own against anyone, especially now that she was a real Jedi knight. She knew that Poe knew that too, but he still managed to make her seem like someone who needed to be protected.

"You've got to be kidding me!"

That was not the reaction he was planning on. And Rey knew it judging by how wide his eyes got. He began to babble off a response in the most Poe way she could think of.

"Well, when we figured out there was a bounty on your head… I don't know, we panicked."

it was Rey's turn to run her hands through her hair. Her hair was longer now, longer than it has ever been before. She took a deep breath in

"I've been communicating with Leia the whole time. If anything happened to me, you would've known. Where are they?'

Dameron's eyebrows shot up and then creased together, his lips curving down into a frown.

"You've been talking to Leia?"

"Yes. Where are they Poe?"

"At some bounty hunter joint in Mos Eisley"

At that she shot him him her best 'are you kidding me' face he could muster as she groaned

"Poe."

He shot his hands up in surrender, bowing he=is head slightly to her in response

"I know I know, I'm sorry."

Her reply came back almost mechanically

"I'm setting course there now. Talk to Leia, tell her what's happening. Hopefully she doesn't demote you again."

She was turned away from him now, focusing on plotting the course rather than continuing a conversation. Her friends needed her. She was brought back by Poe's soften tone

"I will, but Rey?"

She finally chanced a glance back at him. His features were smooth and he looked concerned

"Please be safe."

She shot him a wink and her best impersonation of him that she could

"Always am. I'll see you."

His smile was enough of a response.

"See you around."

—

As soon as she managed to change courses and get a few hours of sleep in, She decided to check back on Ben. He had been in pretty bad shape earlier, and if she was being honest she was spooked by what he had said to her. Sure he was drugged up, but there had to be some truth to that. She knocked once before entering again. He was sitting up on his cot, reading some sort of book when she came in. His eyes drifted to hers as he dropped the book to his side.

"Hey. How are you feeling?"

He shifted on the bed to sit up more, wincing in the process. He groaned back a response.

"Like I got hit by a speeder."

Grumpy Ben was no laughing matter. She figured he wouldn't be a morning person, especially after he took a blow like that to his back. She'd be pretty grumpy too if she were being honest. Nevertheless she decided to try to lighten things up as she smirked

"That good huh?"

She gave him a sweet smile when he actually laughed at her joke. At least he wasn't too grumpy to laugh at her horrible attempt at humor. Rey gave him a quick glance before making her way towards the med kit she left in him room. She held the bottle up, pointing at it with her other hand as she looked back at Ben

"Do you want some more pain killers?"

Surprisingly he waved her off. However, his hands were now on his face, rubbing at his eyes like a small child.

"No, I think I'll be fine. Don't want to have to apologize for more inappropriate outbursts."

Was he referring to his confession last night? She felt her cheeks start to heat up at that, quickly speaking to avoid anymore embarrassment

"It's fine. It's. Not like you meant anything. Can I check it?"

His eyes met hers for a second as if he were searching for something in them before he gave a small nod in response.

"Yeah."

As she lifted the patches off his back, she was surprised to find the cuts actually healing. They looked way better than the other night.

"Thank the force! It's healing nicely, should be better in a week by the looks of it."

Ben responded quietly

"Great."

She should move now, she knew it, but something about the small white scars littering her back made her stay. She traced one with a delicate finger over the thick ripples of muscle around his shoulder blades. When inhaled sharply she removed her hand hoping she didn't hurt him. She cleared her throat before managing to ask the question that had been stuck in her head the moment she saw all the scars.

"Where did you get all these scars?"

She was still behind him, curled up on his bed as he shrugged his shoulders and replied calmly

"Training, mainly."

A chill ran down her spine as she thought of the torture he must have endured. Some of these scars seemed deep. Like they took a good deal of time to heal.

"Snoke did these?"

Ben's head shifted slightly as if he were trying to look back at her as he responded softly

"Pain is used to fuel power. I did what I had to do."

A spark of anger ignited within her at the thought. How could someone willingly participate in that? Why would someone do that to him. She realized just how much he was willing to give up to become someone else. Everything he sacrificed in order to forget his family, his roots. Now he was just a broken man, searching for something. Something she hoped he would find eventually. It wasn't until this m moment that she realized she had given him a scar as well. It was fait now, almost non existent, but still. Her voice was soft as she replied

"I'm sorry."

He had shifted completely now, sitting across from her as he asked

"For what?"

She couldn't manage to look him in the eyes as she responded

"For the scar. The one I gave you."

She only lifted her head when she heard deep laughter fill the air. His laugh was strangely melodic and she would be foolish to ignore the feelings it ignited in her. She liked this Ben.

"It's fine. I think it makes me look more intimidating anyways."

Her lips curved into a small smile before dropping again. She allowed her hazel eyes to drift up to meet his.

"You already were before."

His gaze was intense. It always had been intense, but this felt different

"You're not scared of me though."

She cleared her throat as she responded

"A little."

Before she chickened out, she managed to continue

"I'm more scared of what you make me feel."

Ben's eyebrows shot up in surprise and confusion. He looked down at her in awe

"Oh?"

However, she immediately regretted it. She broke eye contact and began to lift herself off the bed.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have."

A hand stopped her from moving any further.

"Rey."

She barely managed to look back at him when she felt his hand under her chin. He was lifting her head up so he could look into her eyes. As soon as his eyes locked onto hers, she shifted forwards lips connecting with his in gentle kiss. She instantly panicked, but the force bond between them was swimming with life. For once, everything felt at peace. At least for now it did.


	13. Hit Me With Your Best Shot

His lips were gentle against hers. It wasn't rough or demanding like she assumed it would be with someone like Kylo Ren. Ben Solo was another story. He was gentle and caring and she felt herself getting lost in him. He held her waist gently, allowing her to control the kiss. It wasn't until he pulled away that she realized what she had just done. She kissed him and for some reason he let her. As he slowly pulled away, she could feel his gaze on her but she couldn't manage to look at him for fear that he would be mad. That this would change things between them, or even worse. What if he actually liked her back? Isn't that what she wanted to begin with? Then why was it so hard to accept now. Maybe it was her fear of abandonment that held her back from looking back into his eyes at the moment. Whatever it was, she had to change the topic before she was forced to discuss it with him. Clearing her throat that was suddenly as dry as the deserts of Jakku in summer, Rey broke the silence before Ben could.

"Ummm I reset course for Mos Eisley."

She made a conscious effort to get as far away from him as she could as she finished her statement, but he was fast for someone his size. Rey had made it off the bed, but his hand firmly clasped around her delicate wrist, engulfing it completely and then some. She could hear the bewilderment in his voice as he challenged

"Mos Eisley? What's in Mos Eisley?"

Her wrist slipped away from his easily. He wasn't going to hold her hostage, he knew he couldn't even if he tried. Rey commanded respect, and he wasn't going to break the mutual respect they had developed with one another over their journey. However, his voice was raised slightly as he practically pleaded

"Rey, would you please look at me?"

That got her attention. Rey's head slowly tilted up to meet his and she was surprised to find his expression soft. His eyes almost looked a lighter shade of brown than previously. She was in deep trouble now, especially when he looked at her like that.

"Finn and Rose. They were trying to come get me, but they ran into some trouble."

Concern spread across his features for a brief second before he disguised it with something akin to skepticism.

"What kind of trouble?"

Feeling uncomfortable under his penetrating gaze now, Rey crossed her arms over her chest. She was never particularly shy before, but for some reason she felt unsteady under his gaze. He looked at her like no one had ever looked at her before. It was intense and all consuming, and it definitely didn't help that the force seemed to approve of their new dynamic. She however, was uncomfortable at best. Physical contact was something new for her. Not physical contact in itself, but the gentility and sensuality of physical contact with someone who was fond of you. Shaking her head of thoughts of Ben Solo gently stroking her cheek out of her head, Rey continued.

"They got mixed in with some bounty hunters. We need to try to get them out."

His eyebrows shot up, his arms crossing over his chest as if he were mimicking her as he questioned - still very skeptical of the situation.

"And how do you plan on doing that?"

Brushing it off as not a big deal seemed like a good idea, she thought to herself, so that's exactly what she did.

"We'll figure something out."

Ben seemed to respond fine to that - thank the force. The sooner she explained, the sooner she could get out of his magnetic presence. After he gave her a quick nod of approval, she made a swift move for the door, hoping to escape. She was nearly there when a very confused Ben Solo shut the said door, stepping in her way to stop her escape. Always running, she thought to herself.

"Hey, hold on."

He was leaning against the door now, practically looming over her. His lips burst into what she could only describe as a seducing smirk as he pulled her closer by the wrist. His eyes had darkened from before and he was more attractive than she had ever hoped in that moment. It was hard to believe he was talking to her this way. When he spoke again, his voice was in a low whisper.

"Where are you going?"

They were inches apart now, close enough to be considered intimate. She meant to respond with something, but when he moved his hands to her hips and pulled her even closer, all she could say was

"I-uh-"

That's when he placed a finger under her chin and lowered his lips down onto hers in a slow, sensual kiss. It was quick, but left her speechless when they broke apart. He was smiling, a true and genuine smile which she wished to return, but she was too overwhelmed by everything at the moment. This was too much to accept right now. That's why she decided to take a step back and reach for the door knob.

"I'm sorry. I just need a second."

—

She slipped out of Ben's chambers as fast as she could manage, her cheeks burning at the thought of his phantom kiss against her lips. She was crazy - that was the only explanation. Either that or she was a fool. She wanted him, that was true. The force wanted them to continue on this - whatever it was - that was true, but she still had a strange gut feeling. It felt as if something bad was going to happen, and soon. She didn't know what to make of it, if it had to do with Ben and the bond or something else completely. She didn't even realize that she was still stuck to the door until Ava walked by with a strange look on her face. She looked over Rey, her eyes darting from Ben's door to her as a smirk started to light up her face. Rey cleared her throat, breaking the awkward silence before Ava said something about the compromising situation she found herself in.

"Hey Ava. Did you guys sleep well?"

Ava's smile widened even deeper before the mischievous look fell from her eyes and was replaced by a kind, almost warm gaze; a look that Rey didn't know the woman possessed.

"Yeah. Thanks again Rey, I owe you one. How is Ben doing?"

There it was again. Her last question was laced with something as if she were insinuating something that Rey wasn't ready to acknowledge yet. Nevertheless, it still made her uncomfortable. She tried her best to respond as smoothly as she could manage

"He's good… I mean he's feeling better."

Ava's eyebrows arched up in question. As smooth as she was trying to be, she was failing miserably.

"Did something happen?"

Taking a much needed breath, Rey tried to reset, moving within the force to calm herself. She would sort out her feelings towards the dark knight later. Right now she would stick to the facts she knew to be true.

"We reset course to Mos Eisley."

This got the woman to stop, eyes widening briefly, but she continued on

"No, I mean between you two?"

Rey shook her head in response, keeping the emotion out of her voice. She managed to respond in an almost clinical tone as if she were a doctor and Ben was her patient. Which was partially true. She had bags under her eyes to prove it.

"No, nothing. He was in pretty bad shape last night, but he's better now."

She watched as Ava looked her over skeptically as if she were about to call her out on a bluff, but she simply nodded her head taking in the information.

"Okay. Why are we going to Mos Eisley? That place is not somewhere you want to go for vacation if that's what you're thinking."

Rey's response was once again serious. She would represent what she assumed was the classic Jedi persona. She was a Jedi after all, maybe it was time to start acting like one.

"We have another rescue mission to take care of."

Rey turned on her heels, needing to get away from Ben's chambers before he decided to make an appearance. Ava matched her pace beside her as they walked towards the main hub.

"Alright. Well hey, before you leave will you do me a favor?"

Rey stopped in her tracks, turning to face the woman once again as she gave a short nod to encourage Ava to continue

"I told Thea about the Jedi and how they can use the force. Would you show her a few things?"

Allowing herself a bright smile, Rey replied

"Oh, Sure."

With that, Ava turned to face the hallway again, making a gesture with her hand at someone.

"Hey Thea, Rey wants to show you a few things."

—

As much as he wanted to be the good guy and not eavesdrop on their conversation, Ben couldn't help but listen in as Rey's beautifully accented voice responded to Ava's game of questions. He was confused, but he knew that she just needed time to allow herself to feel. He cared for her, more than he would like to admit. The little scavenger from Jakku had gotten under his skin and managed to find a place in his heart which was a new experience for him. He didn't like to let people in, not his parents, not Luke but somehow this girl- no this woman now- had managed to make her way in. He didn't deserve it, he probably never would, but it felt right. The force around them was thrumming with energy, with excitement even. It was trying to push them together and for once he didn't want to ignore it.

He waited till he heard their footsteps dissipate down the hallway before he peaked his head out. His back was still incredibly sore, but he needed to get up and walk around so he wouldn't get worse. He slowly made his way down the hall until her stopped at the scene before him. Rey had her back faced towards him, but she was crouched in front of Ava's daughter, Thea. She was explaining something. He didn't want to interrupt so he simply leaned against the frame of the archway as he watched.

"Hello Thea. Your mother told you about the force right?'

Thea nodded at Rey, almost embarrassed by her question. Rey continued to explain, a little awkwardly at first

"Well what would you say if I told you the force is in everyone?"

The young girls eyes lit up like the stars in the sky at that. He was sure Rey had to be smiling, because he himself found it hard to keep a frown.

"Close your eyes and feel out. Do you feel anything?"

The young girl closed her eyes tight, squishing her eyebrows together as she tried to concentrate. She stayed like this for a second before sighing.

"No."

Rey's head bobbed up and down in a nod as she hummed something. Then she reached her hands towards Thea

"Take my hands."

The young girl wrapped her hands in Rey's outstretched palms

"Now close your eyes again."

He could feel the tug through the force, the opening and warmth surrounding them. She left the bond open. He closed his eyes to revel in the warmth of the room. This is what lightness felt like. What happiness and life was like. His stomach clenched as he remembered what he had done, who he was. He tried to close off the bond as the dark thoughts came swirling into his head. The light was brushed aside, filled with a dark chill. He broke himself off, opening his eyes as he heard Thea's small voice

"What was that?"

He heard the panic in Rey's voice for a brief second before she answered the girl

"You felt that?"

He watched in embarrassment as Rey's head snapped around to face him. She was worried Thea felt his conflicting battle with the dark side. He looked down.

"Yeah! It was warm and I- I don't know how to explain it."

He could practically feel Rey's sigh of relief before she responded warmly

"That's the force."

He managed to look back at the scene before him, glad he didn't introduce the young girl to the darkness lingering within himself, as she looked up at Rey as if she were some kind of goddess.

"Rey?"

Rey's attention was brought back by the young girl in front of her as she responded

"Yeah?"

The girls smile grew wide as she said her next words

"I want to be like you someday."

—

She wasn't mad, but she definitely wasn't happy either. He could tell by the almost chastising look she gave him. It reminded him of his mother. He groaned internally as Rey closed in on him. He managed to make it to the cock pit when she addressed him.

"Ben-"

Her gaze was intense as she looked over him. It felt as if she were waiting for him to crack, to fall apart before her; revert back to the evil Kylo Ren she had come to know. She was disappointed in him and somehow that hurt more than her being mad at him. He knew what it was like to be a disappointment. He had been a disappointment his whole life, so it's not really a new feeling to him, but he expected that from his family - not from Rey. He was trying. Trying to calm the raging sea inside of him. The pain and power that overflowed within him. The Skywalker curse. He took a deep breath before he began

"I know, I'm sorry. I didn't think the bond was still open."

She moved in closer to him, practically pushing him up against the wall as she whispered back

"I thought you were done with the darkness, with Snoke."

There was something in her tone, something that gave him chills. She was scared. Scared of what? Of him? He grimaced at the memory of him gently ripping through her mind. She had abandonment issues, he knew that, but was she really scared he would leave? Or was she scared what she would have to do to him if he flipped. He hated how his emotions waged war within himself. He tried to calm himself, but it was too late. This is never going to work if she still doesn't trust him.

"I never said I was."

Rey's eyebrows jumped up, her eyes widening as she took a step back from him. Her eyes were filled with emotion as she ran her delicate hands through her hair. It was longer than before, he liked it like this, but he couldn't think of that right now. He needed to focus. Rey sighed in frustration

"Ben I can't keep doing this. I-"

She looked torn. She was at battle with herself - inside her own head - because of him. She cared about him, that was clear, but he wasn't the easiest to deal with, to care about. He gave sigh of his own before stepping closer to her. Her hazel eyes looked up into his deep brown ones. He refused to look anywhere else beside her captivating eyes as he whispered back

"I'm working on it. It won't happen again."

Her gaze held as firm as her tone as she responded almost emotionlessly

"Good."

Neither one of them had managed to move away from each other. Rey had shifted her eyes away the moment she responded, but her body stood frozen inches away from him. He wanted so desperately to reach out and hold her, but he could practically feel the conflict rolling off of her in waves, so he stayed put. They were both frozen in pace, Rey looking down at her feet and Ben looking down at her, until Ava walked in

"So, what's the plan?"

Ben snapped his head in her direction. The young woman looked confused as she glanced between the two of them suspiciously.

"Sorry, did I interrupt something?"

He turned his head back to Rey, but she was already moving and flipping switches on the control panel

"No, everything is fine. We need to find a way in somehow. I don't know what kind of trouble they got into, but Poe said it wasn't anything good."

Rey moved around the cock pit liked a general, her hands behind her. She looked like a leader. He wondered what kind of position she held In the resistance now. He wouldn't be surprised if she was a commander or in a position of power there. They would be foolish not to have her in a position of power. She looked young, but she was wiser than most - wiser than the last time saw each other. She had managed to perfect and execute control over her own emotions, something he tried desperately to do at her ageHe watched calmly as Ava approached her

"Mhmm, that sounds good, but there's still one thing we have to worry about."

Rey turned around as Ava continued to explain

"You two have a bounty on your head. How do you expect to get in there without someone trying to take you down?"

He watched as Rey's lips curved up into a slight smile as she responded

"That's where you come in."

Ava simply raised an eyebrow as if to prompt Rey to continue

"You're a bounty hunter right? So, you offer me as a bargain for Finn and Rose."

Ben could feel his anger rise up again. No way was he going to let Rey go in that dump by herself. He didn't question her ability to take down a few bounty hunters, but he was not willing to sit this one out. Especially not when there was something nagging in the force surrounding the place. He had too much energy to get out of his system. He found himself muttering under his breath

"This is going to get messy."

He didn't think he said it out loud until Ava's eyes locked onto his. She looked him over before turning back to Rey

"What about Kylo?"

Rey wouldn't look at him, she refused to as she responded firmly

"He stays. So does Thea."

He stood at that, a little too quickly. His back still ached and protested as he stood, but he was not going to let that get in the way. The pain would fuel him if anything else. He tried to hide his wince as he spoke up, eyes never leaving Rey's face

"I'm fine, my back is healed. It's probably better if I go anyways. You could exchange both of us to make it a fair deal. I know how these dealers work."

He watched as her lips curled up to protest, but Ava stepped in quickly to stop any kind of dispute that was about to take place. She looked between the two before responding with little to no enthusiasm.

"Okay then it's set."

—

Ava had debriefed them quickly when they arrived on the planet, Mos Eisley. She made sure to tell them about the man they would be "sold" to and how he worked. Rey had never been one to shy away from anything, and she was confident in her plans success, but there was still a nagging feeling deep within the force that she couldn't shake. At first she thought it was Ben, but it felt different. She had felt his conflict many times before, but what she was feeling now felt more dangerous. It was dark and painful. Part of her wanted to insist that Ben stay on the ship, but she knew he would fight her until he got his way. The man was just about as stubborn as general Organa. It was too late anyways.

Now they were in a poorly lit cantina surrounded by a motley crew of bounty hunters who were unaware of their identities. Both Ben and Rey wore dark hooded capes and pieces of plated armor to fit into the crowd of trained assassins. Both wore masks to hide their faces and were both strapped with weapons of their own. Blasters and blades hidden under layers of dark clothes. Ava had both their sabers attached to her hip under her coat, along with the cuffs she would place on them the second they got closer to their destination. Rey shifted her neck slowly to the side trying to readjust the chunky ring of metal around it. They had to use force dampeners to make their whole charade more convincing, but Ava had the switch to turn them off as planned.

The second they reached their destination, Ava turned to them and locked the cuffs around each of their wrists before giving them a wink and entering the room. They followed closely behind, almost like body guards after the petite woman. The room they entered was lighter than the bustling Cantina, but not by much. When they entered, Rey's eyes immediately locked onto a man standing in the center of the room. He was human for all she could tell, with fair skin and shorty cropped black hair that was streaked with stripes of grey along the sides. He was dressed elegantly despite the bulging muscles in his arms. His face seemed kind until they inched closer. One of his eyes was glassed over , the pupil almost completely milked over. A matching scar ran deep across his whole face, from one corner of his forehead to the tip of his jaw. She flinched at the reminder of the scar she left on Ben - it could have been so much worse. She could have blinded him like someone did to this man.

The man in front of them nodded slowly as he paced closer to them. He was surrounded by large guards who were all equipped with vibroblades and blasters. A chill ran down Rey's spine as she looked upon the number of guards. Ten. Surely they could take ten. They had fought off Snoke and his guards, how hard could this be? Her attention was brought back as soon as the man opened his mouth to speak. His voice was rough as if he had swallowed a blade whole.

"Ava, what brings you around here?"

Ava approached him slowly, a fake smile plastered on her face as she responded.

"I have a deal for you Jarik."

The man -Jarik - let out a snort before laughing loudly. He stood in front of Ava, hands in his pockets, a sincere looking smile on his face as he spoke.

"Do you? I thought you were working the big leagues now. Why would you want to make a deal with me?"

Ava simply smiled back, swatting the man in the shoulder as if she wasn't speaking to a professional bounty hunter.

"I am, but I recently pissed off my current employer. He's not too happy with me, at least he won't be when he hears what I did."

Jarik made his way back to a table in the back, not once questioning Ben and Rey's presence in the room. Maybe he just assumed they were companions or guards, but he was relaxed enough to not care much. Either that or he was confident in his own guards and their abilities. Nevertheless, he took a seat at the old wooden table and poured a drink for himself.

"So what can I do for you?"

He made a motion for Ava to take a glass as well, but she kindly denied. She stood behind one of the chairs at the table that faced the man.

"I need to make a trade. I think it will help get my boss off my back."

Rey watched as Jarik's spine stiffened. Good bounty hunters didn't make trades often. That was saved for the smugglers like Han Solo. Bounty hunters like him were careful who they did trades with and who they trusted. He took a long sip before questioning

"What kind of trade?"

Ava took a seat then, leaning in closer to the man as she whispered back a response.

"I hear you have some prisoners. They would be resistance members posing as bounty hunters."

Jarik's back quickly lost it's rigid posture. Instead he let out another round of whooping laughter that lasted longer than Rey thought necessary. He kicked back in his chair, his booted feet laying on the table as he replied

"Those kids? I'll tell you Ava, they stood out the second they stepped foot in this place asking about their friend - that Jedi girl."

Rey couldn't see her face very clearly, but she could tell. By the tone in her voice that Ava had rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, those are the ones."

Jarik's hand came up to make a gesture as he continued

"They're not worth much, but I hoped to bargain them back to General Organa. She is a wealthy woman after all."

Ava's back stiffened at the mention of the general. She was well informed on the resistance thanks to her chat beforehand with Rey. Ava played along perfectly, luring out her old friend.

"She's also an intelligent leader. What makes you think she would cut a deal with bounty hunter like you? Trust me, you're going to want to hear me out on my deal."

He scoffed before taking in a long breath and blowing it out. He looked Ava up and down one more time before he moved his feet back under him.

"Okay kid, but only because you're like family here."

She wasted no time in setting up the deal.

"Kylo Ren."

Rey was surprised she mentioned Ben first. Maybe it was his status or the fact that he was a hated man across the galaxy, but it still got the effect they were hoping for. Jarik's eyes widened before they shifted to squint at Ava.

"What about him? He's a deserter now isn't he?"

Rey chanced a glance at Ben beside her for a second. He was perfectly still, almost frozen really. She would have figured he would have some kind of reaction, but he was as silent as he had ever been. She set her attention back on Ava as she stood

"I have him held prisoner along with the Resistance Jedi. They're all yours if you agree to the trade."

Jarik stood in a flash to match her, the eagerness plain in his features

"You're bluffing."

Ava's hands came up to make some kind of coded gesture that looked like crossing her heart as she replied seriously

"I swear Jarik."

The man looked back to his guards before nodding to them and then to Ava. He made the same gesture back before replying.

"Bring them to me."

Both of them stood completely still as Ava marched towards them to make the big reveal. Jarik watched her in confusion as she lowered their hoods and detached their masks to reveal their true identities. The shock was evident on not only Jarik's face, but his guards as well. They all stiffened, gripping their weapons at the sight of the two most powerful force users in the galaxy in their presence. The man stood still for a moment before slowly making his way towards them. He let out a low whistle as soon as he was a few feet apart from them. The scar on his face seemed even deeper now that Rey could see it up close. His eyes meticulously ran over the both of them as he continued to get closer. It strangely felt like they were rare artifacts being auctioned off.

"You weren't kidding kid. How the hell did you manage to pull this off?"

Ava stood in front of the two, creating some kind of barrier between them and eager bounty hunter. She placed her hands on her hips as she responded in a light-hearted manner.

"I told you I'm in the big leagues now J. I have my ways."

His head bobbed up and down in a satisfied nod as he replied

"I'm impressed."

He made an attempt to move closer and get a better look at them, but Ava was quick to stop him. Her hand came up to his shoulder as her tone shifted back to serious.

"Where are the prisoners?"

With that, Jarik quickly made a gesture to his guards who responded immediately. They returned with a very confused looking Finn and Rose. Rey noticed a dark bruise around Finn's eye, but other than that the pair looked undamaged. She let out a small sigh she didn't know she was holding in at that. The second the two managed to spot Rey their eyes widened in surprise. Jarik motioned to bring them closer as he inquired

"These are the ones?"

Ava didn't get the chance to respond as both Finn and Rose shouted at the same time upon their arrival

"Rey!"

Ava shot them a death glare to try to silence them, Rey tried to do the same. This would not be good if they didn't cooperate. She tried her best to convince her friends that she was fine, that everything would be okay with her eyes. She should have known it would be harder than that, especially now that all her friends seemed to be looking at now was a very disheveled looking Kylo Ren; their eyes glossed over with anger.

Ava shot a quick look at Rey before she nodded, prompting Ava to respond accordingly

"Yes."

As soon as she replied, she quickly stepped aside to allow the older man a chance to look over the both of them. His eyes locked on the contraption around Ben's neck.

"You used force dampeners? I mean you had to right?"

"Yes."

Jarik made his way inches from Ben now who seemed to dwarf the older man in size. He looked up at Ben, squinting his eyes as he spoke in something close to a growl

"Kylo Ren you sly son of a bitch. You're bigger than I expected. Must've been a hard one to put down, doesn't look like he'd be put down by tranquilizers fast enough. How'd you manage to get him? You didn't sleep with him did you?"

Ava rolled her eyes at that, giving Jarik an annoyed look as she responded

"No, it was an even fight. He's not as fast as he looks. Plus he's got a bad back injury."

The man nodded in approval before he shifted to face Rey. She tried to remain void of emotion as the man looked over her like she was something to be sold. She knew the look. She had received it many times on Jakku, she was even offered a job in the cantina when she was sixteen, but she would not sell her body to anyone like that. She was desperate to eat back then, but not that desperate. Frankly, she would rather starve. Still, she had to remain calm right now as this man looked her over.

"And the girl. She's a pretty little thing isn't she. I've heard rumors she's a scrappy fighter, I mean I would be too if I grew up on that wasteland."

Ava shot an almost apologetic glance to Rey before she cut Jarik off from saying anything more.

"The deal Jarik."

That brought his gaze off of Rey for the time being, and back to Ava. She made a mental note to thank her later.

"Right. I accept, you are free to take the resistance kids."

That's when Finn began to fight back. He had his eyes locked on Rey as he pushed back against the guards.

"No, you need to get Rey. She needs to come with us!"

But Ava was quick, whispering in a hushed voice so Jarik wouldn't hear.

—

She moved the pair out of the room as fast as she could manage after shaking hands with Jarik. She needed to get them out before they did something stupid and ruined the whole plan. Ava glared at them now, crossing her arms in front of her as the pair tried to protest. The man was the worst, persistent as all hell, but Ava managed to push him into the wall just outside of the Cantina as she hissed

"Would you shut up? This is part of the plan. I need you to go to the Falcon. My daughter is there waiting. We will take care of Jarik and his men."

The man seemed shocked by this, but the woman looked at her, suspicion still dancing in her eyes, but she finally spoke up.

"But we don't know you."

Ava softened her gaze significantly before addressing them again. These were resistance troops, they wouldn't take well to her serious and often times cynical personality. She tried to speak as genuinely as she could manage, hoping the pair caught on.

"Rey does. She saved my daughter and now it's my turn to save them. Please just go."

—

As soon as Ava hauled Finn and Rose out, Rey felt the collar around her neck release it's hold. It wasn't noticeable to Jarik, but she could feel the force surround her again. She managed a quick look at Ben who gave her a small nod in response. Jarik was too caught up in his victory to piece anything together. He was pacing between the two before he stopped in front of Ben, a murderous look in his eyes as he spoke

"I can't believe she was foolish enough to make this trade. Both of your lives combined are worth more credits than I'd know what to do with. Dead or alive. I don't know if I want to risk transporting you alive. The girl maybe, but you are a sick man. I've heard stories about things you've done to people- to families. Don't worry I'll make sure you pay for your crimes."

Rey's eyes were locked on the two men beside her. She noticed Ben's hands fist up at the mention of his past crimes, but Jarik continued to push on. Ben waited until the man was done spitting insults at him to respond.

"I'm not sure that's a good idea."

The older man looked confused and annoyed at Ben's remark. His eyebrows arched as he asked

"And why is that?"

That's when Ben reached his hands up, making a show of bursting off the metal handcuffs with the force before reaching up and tossing the collar to the ground. He looked down at the older man, a smirk on his face as he responded

"It wouldn't be a fair fight."

That's when all hell broke loose. Jarik stumbled back, reaching for his weapon as he cursed himself.

"Shit."

They didn't have much time to think before the guards were on them, weapons out and activated. It wasn't until she reached down to her side that she realized Ava still had their weapons. Dammit! This was going to be a lot more interesting then she previously anticipated. The piercing sound of a blaster rung out as one of the guards dropped dead. She reached for the long blade strapped to her back underneath her robe as a guard approached her. Rey was far more skilled with a staff blade than a simple blaster. She would leave the kill shots up to Ben, who apparently was a sharp shot.

Thankfully only half of the guards had vibroblades, which she admittedly hated with a passion since their battle in the thrown room. She still had a scar to remind her of the time. Ducking under the electric blade, Rey took out her opponents feet and then shot up for the kill shot. It was easier now than it had been before- to kill. She used to be torn over the idea, but she got used to it. It was a war after all, there was bound to be death. She pushed back as another guard launched towards her.

—-

Ben had shot down about three guards already and from what he could gather, Rey had taken down about two with her staff. Only five more to go - make that four. He watched as Rey took out one more guard. She was skilled - far more skilled than she already was before. Something inside his heart tugged at the idea. He was proud of her for some odd reason. However, his little daydream was short lived as another guard came barreling at him, this time with a vibroblade. He quickly dodged to the side, tossing his blaster in exchange for an abandoned vibroblade of his own. He quickly overpowered the man, taking one of his arms clean off before ending his misery with a strike to the chest.

Ben's back was burning, but he fought the feeling. The darkness around him latched onto the pain and thrived, giving him the strength to continue. He fought swiftly, making his way through the sad excuses of guards Jarik had before they were all gone. It wasn't until He was standing across the room from Rey that he realized there were no more. That was easy. He was breathing hard now the darkness thriving in this environment, but the second his eyes met Rey that changed. She was breathing just as hard as he was, not a scrape on her. Their eyes met across the room with an intensity he couldn't begin to understand. Her hazel eyes danced with fire as she started to run towards him.

That's when the nagging feeling in the force increased ten fold. Everything around him froze as he watched what he assumed was the dead body of Jarik leap back up and swing an active vibroblade at Rey. She was quick, but not quick enough. The blade caught her right in the abdomen, throwing her to the ground with an agonizing scream.

"Rey!"

It felt like a nightmare. A horrible, horrible nightmare. Everything seemed to go dark around him as he launched at Jarik, taking his head clean off with his own blade and tossing him to the side as he sprinted towards Rey. His blood ran cold as he watched the deep crimson of her blood pool up around her. His eyes burned as he dropped to his knees beside her. He tried to stop the bleeding, but it kept flowing out at an alarming rate. He quickly began to ball up her discarded cape, ripping a section to tie around her waist before hauling her up into his arms. She was already unconscious, her breathing growing slower by the minute. He needed to hurry.

He sprinted out of the cantina, keeping Rey close as people eyed him suspiciously. When he got closer to the ship, he was met by a confused Ava. She froze in place at the scene. He had to admit it looked horrific. Both of them were covered in Rey's blood. He had to look utterly panicked because Ava addressed him calmly for the first time since they met.

"Ben, what happened?"

He continued to walk past her, shouting over his shoulder as he pushed on

"She took a vibroblade to the abdomen."

Ava quickly met his stride, running alongside him as she questioned

"Force! What about the rest?"

He could feel his eyes gloss over with anger at the memory. His voice came out rough and raw

"They're dead. We need to get her to the Falcon."

—

The second he entered, he was bombarded by the ex-stormtrooper and the resistance girl.

"What the hell did you do? I thought you said they had it handled!"

He turned on Finn, pure rage in his eyes as he prepared to strike, but Ava was there in a second, trying to explain as best as she could.

"They did! It was a cheap shot."

Ben wasted no time, moving past the resistance lackies to get Rey the care she deserved - the care she desperately needed. He barked out

"Ava get the medkit. It should be in my room."

The woman nodded before sprinting towards him chambers. Finn moved to his side, trying to protest with him before he could move any further

"You've already caused enough damage."

He was not going to take this, not right now, not when Rey needed him. Plus, he was beginning to grow a little light headed himself. He snapped at the shorter man, pushing him aside to lay Rey down in her own room.

"I'm not leaving her! If you want to help, hand me that shirt over there. We need to stop the bleeding or else we lose her."

The man didn't budge, so he tried to soften his voice. His emotions catching up with him as the shock began to wear off. His heart ached and his head was swimming as he pleaded with Rey's friends.

"Please."

Silence surrounded them as he waited for the other mans response. With one sharp nod, Finn made a move for the shirt, tossing it to him.

"Okay, hold on."

He accepted it as he began ripping off the makeshift tournikit he made earlier. After that was removed, he reluctantly ripped away Rey's shirt to get a better look at the wound. What he found was worse than he could ever imagine. Thankfully Ava finally arrived

"Here's the kit!"

He found it hard to speak looking down at the wound that spanned across her whole upper abdomen. It was deep and gushing blood as he tied another tournakit around her middle. His voice practically cracked when he spoke again

"Toss me some bacta and numbing patches."

She was pale. Deathly pale by the time he stopped the bleeding and stuck a series of patches along the wound. He wasn't feeling too hot himself anymore, but he had to make sure Rey was alright before he passed out. His hand shot to her neck, trying to find a pulse. It was there, but…. It stopped. This isn't happening. The resistance girl's voice came out behind him in a strained whisper,

"What's happening."

Ben's voice would not work, tears filling his eyes for the first time since he was a child as he heard Ava whisper a response

"We're losing her."

That's when he snapped, he couldn't take it. His head throbbed and his stomach churned, but he was lost. He knelt next to Rey, taking her hand in his as he pleaded

"No, No! Damit! Rey, please sweetheart pull through. You can't die, not like this. You're the good one. I can't go on without you."

Ava's hand was on his shoulder in an instant, her voice was soft

"Kylo, you need to calm down."

He brushed her off, standing to his feet as she shot back, tear finally streaming down his face

"She doesn't deserve this!"

He was panicking, The room around him was spinning and he snapped. He felt Ava push him back into a wall. She was trying to calm him down, he knew that, but it wasn't processing.

"No, she doesn't but getting mad isn't going to do anything. We need to get her somewhere."

Everything was a blur. He couldn't see anything as his stomach burned with excruciating pain. That's when he stopped breathing. He tried to take in deep breathes but they were not filling up his lungs the way it should.

"Kylo! You need to breath. Come on, there you go."

He heard Finn's voice ring out around them

"What's happening?"

The words seemed to bounce against the walls, he was slipping further into unconsciousness.

"I think he's going into shock."

Finn's response came quickly and much too loudly. Everything was loud. Very loud.

"We've got Rey. Just, get him to calm down."

He felt his body go limp.

"He's crashing."

Everything sounded like it was underwater.

"What?"

Pain. So much pain.

"I don't know, his pulse is weak."

Warmth. A light

"What do we do?"

He reached for the light. It was calling him.

"Call the general."


	14. Life, Death and Consequences

There was light all around her. A blinding, ethereal light that warmed her body from the inside out. It felt almost like a hot summer day in Jukku, only the fire was coming from within herself and it wasn't at all unpleasant. She found herself in a room that emanated the same ashen light she felt inside herself. Standing in the middle of the abandoned room, Rey felt like she should be panicking - like she should be searching for something - but nothing could subdue the high she felt right now. She was invincible. Looking down, she realized she was dressed in beautiful flowing robes of white and gold. Her feet moved forward on their own accord until she came upon a large, wooden door in the center of the otherwise empty room. Without hesitation, she reached for the delicate, golden knob. She twisted it in her hand, ready to open it until she heard something shuffle behind her. Turning on her heels in a flash, Rey was met with the piercing blue eyes she had come to acquaint with her former master. Luke Skywalker stood before her as clear as if he had never left. She has seen him before, but not as clear and real as she saw him now. Tears began to pool in her eyes before she could stop it. Luke's mouth turned into an apologetic smile before he took a step further, placing a gentle hand to one side of her face. She felt herself smiling, despite the tears now falling down her face.

"Long time no see kid."

The tears that had pooled in her eyes now overflowed down her face. She let them fall freely as she looked upon her master in confusion

"Luke? What's happening?"

She watched carefully as his blue eyes seemed to flicker with something before he let out a long, breathy sigh. He reached out for one of her hands that was hanging loosely at her side before he continued on

"Your body is fighting to stay alive right now. In order to sustain yourself, you seem to have gone into some kind of force trance."

His hand was warm and he held it firmly in his own as he spoke in nothing more than a soft whisper. The brightness of the room seemed to dim a little as it finally clicked.

"That's why I'm seeing you? You're not really here, are you?"

Luke shook his head sympathetically

"No, I'm sorry."

Shaking her hand loose from his, Rey turned away from Skywalker. She was gaining her memories back and they were too much - too much emotion to sort through at the moment. She couldn't bear to turn around and look back at Luke because it would confirm what she already knew. Her voice came out in a hoarse croak

"Why are you here? There has to be a reason."

Luke was behind her in an instant, turning her around so she could look into his eyes. What she found there was not pity or sadness which she had expected to see. Instead there was a fire, a recognition. He wanted to tell her something, he needed to tell her something. So did that mean she wasn't dead yet? When Luke spoke, he spoke with an eagerness that he never seemed to possess before

"The force is working around you Rey. Feel it, reach out towards it. It's trying to tell you something."

She knew exactly what he was talking about. She felt it. So when her eyes closed, it was no surprise to her that the force shifted and twirled around her. It was almost as if it were preparing her for something. Her eyes opened slowly before she looked onto Luke and replied

"I know, I felt it before I got hurt. I felt it when I was… with Ben."

There was a brief moment of hesitation from Luke before he spoke again. His head bowed down as he spoke as if he were resigned

"I'm sorry Rey."

If she wasn't confused before, now she really was. Why in the world was Luke Skywalker, her master and surrogate father figure, apologizing to her? Sure, he had left her, but that was because of Kylo Ren and his vendetta against his uncle.

"Excuse me?"

Luke's head snapped back up, his eyes locking with hers as he spoke quickly.

"You were right about Ben. He's still conflicted. There's still light working in him, I can feel it. He's battling with the darkness, fighting it off."

She felt herself nodding as if it were common knowledge. She shifted uncomfortably as she thought about her relationship with Ben Solo. All soft kisses and gentle caresses, far from the image he projected across the galaxy. Clearing her throat she admitted

"I know. He left the First Order. He's been helping me."

She didn't think she could be surprised any further today, but Luke was apparently on a roll. He reached forward, grasping both of her shoulders in his hands as he spoke

"Keep him close. You need to keep an eye on him."

The crystal pools of blue that were Luke Skywalker's eyes were far too intense to look at any longer. Rey shifted out of his grasp and glanced down to her feet before daring to look back at her former master.

"Why?"

Luke paced back and forth in front of her as he rambled on quickly almost as if he were running out of time

"He needs you. You need him. You two are better together than apart due to the nature of your bond. I didn't understand it before, but it's clear to me now. He's fighting the darkness off because of you. You know this already."

When his pacing ceased, he landed in front of Rey again. Her heart felt like it was on fire. Come to think of it, her whole body felt like it were on fire at the moment. She knew her bond with Ben was unique and even a little strange, but to hear Luke Skywalker say it was something to hold onto was something else completely. For so long she tried to rid herself of the bond that felt more like an annoyance than anything. She had read text searching for ways to break the curse, but to no avail. Now it made sense. It was a survival thing. It was something deeper than the two of them. Now, she found herself speechless before Luke. It took her a moment before she could respond, her voice coming out strangled

"I do - I mean I do now."

The urgency in Luke's eyes dulled down as it was replaced by a softness. His voice was a whisper as if to match the softness he held in his eyes.

"Just be careful Rey. He may seem like he can control it, but he's struggling. He's going to struggle until Snoke is gone. It's going to be a battle starting the second you wake up. Find him and don't leave his side."

She could feel her eyebrows push together in question

"What do you mean? Where are we?'

Luke was fading along with the room around her. The lightness was extinguishing before her and the warmth was replaced with searing pain.

"Its okay Rey. Listen to the force and you'll know what to do from there."

She tried to reach out, but she couldn't reach him anymore. She needed to know what was going to happen. What was he trying to tell her?

"Luke, wait!"

Luke's form was almost completely transparent now. He was barely a whisper in the air.

"Wake up now, he needs you."

She couldn't take it anymore. The pain was overwhelming and her heart felt like it was about to burst. She cried out

"Luke!"

The last thing she heard from him was a soft yet firm command

"Wake up."

She was overcome with the pain. The weight in her heart had lifted, but now she felt like her stomach was going to fall out of her abdomen and onto the floor. She heard someone shouting out something but it was almost as if she were stuck underwater.

"Rey!"

Poe? Was that Poe? Or maybe it was Finn? She briefly remembered hearing Finn's voice before she passed out the first time.

"Please!"

She was beginning to feel her own body again, along with all the pain of her injury. There was a quick prick in her arm before the pain started to quickly dissipate. She felt her chest rise and fall with a sigh.

"She's coming around!"

She was warm again. The sensation calm and relaxing. Maybe if she opened her eyes she would see Luke again.

"Open your eyes sweetheart."

Poe. She could make out the voice now. He was worried, something foreign to the cocky fighter pilot. She felt a small smile start to spread across her lips.

"Come on."

She could make out all the voices in the room now. Poe, Finn, Rose.

"We're here for you."

Her eyelids were heavy, but she pushed as hard as she could. She needed to see her friends, she needed to know she was alive. With one final grunt, her eyelids peeled open. Everything was covered in a hazy blue fog for a second before a pair of warm chocolate eyes came into view.

"Poe?"

She blinked once, twice before the fog completely faded away. A bright smile met her

"Hey, there she is."

She was looking around the room, expecting to find a smug Luke Skywalker somewhere in the corner, but when she didn't she let herself relax. Poe had a hand on her leg as he spoke quietly

as if he would hurt her if he spoke any louder

"You scared us there for a second."

Her lips curled into a tight smile as she moved to place her hand on top of Poe's. When her hand didn't meet his, she looked down her body. She was hooked up to an array of beeping machines. Her abdomen was wrapped in layers of thick cotton bandages. She tried to move her hand again, but her body was not responding.

"Rey?"

She kept trying, needing some ounce of control, but finding none.

"Why can't I move?"

Poe was looking behind her at someone. She couldn't move her head to look, but she heard Finn's voice carry over her shoulder.

"Probably the drugs they had to give you. Your heart stopped a few times."

She struggled to get up, she needed to get up. Why wouldn't her body respond? Was this what Luke was talking about when he said she would have to battle? Would she ever be able to move again? Oh force, what if she was like this permanently?

"I-I need to get up."

Her head moved from side to side frantically as if that would prompt her body to respond. It didn't. Poe's hands shot out to hold her head still.

"No no no no. I know you're tough but right now you just need to relax. You almost died Rey.'

That's when the tears sprang up, her heart rate was picking up and she was panicking. Poe tried to hold her head still and for once, she listened. Her sobs were hysterical and she was sure she would be embarrassed later, but right now she couldn't control it. She blamed the damn drugs for her outburst, but her friends all looked down at her with compassion and understanding. She cried until she felt her heart start to slow down again. Until she felt another prick in her arm. Until she felt a flicker of something through the force. Ben? Force! Ben! She needed to find him. She needed to see him, desperately.

"I need - where is he?"

Poe, who had moved to get her some tissues turned back around at the sound of her voice.

"Who?"

Her voice was rough like sandpaper in her throat.

"Where's Ben?"

Rose was now by her side, brushing the hair out of her face as she tried to calm her down. But she had already seen the panic in her friends faces at the mention of the dark prince.

"Shhh he's fine."

They knew where he was and… something wasn't right. She needed to follow Luke's orders, to follow the force.

"You don't understand, I-"

That's when her eyes locked on the woman in the corner of the room. Not the Skywalker she was expecting, but she wasn't complaining. Maybe she would understand. Her voice was soft and gentle

"Rey."

Rey let her eyes lock on the generals gentle brown eyes. Her eyes were so much like her sons.

"Leia?"

The general was by her side now. She looked exhausted, but she bent down to grab Rey's hand, rubbing soothing circles into it.

"It's okay, just rest."

There was another prick in her arm and everything was growing warm again. The room was starting to shift around her.

"Wha-what's happening? I need- Him. I need -Ben."

Then everything went black.

—

His head was pounding when he finally came to again. A migraine welcoming him back into consciousness. He was no stranger to migraines. He got them often as a child and much through his young adult years, but this one was especially vicious.

"Ben? Wake up."

He shifted as he recognized the voice. Ava? Why was she here? Then all the events of the previous day came rushing back to him. He let his eyes slowly open as he took in the cool toned hospital room around him. He shifted to a seated position as he locked eyes with the bounty hunter.

"What the fuck happened? Where's Rey?"

He heard a raspy voice respond, but it was not the woman in front of him. It was a voice he would recognize anywhere.

"Ben."

He didn't even try to hide the shock in his face as he slowly turned his head to meet the woman who gave birth to him. The woman he hadn't seen since he was thirteen. A lot has changed since then. His voice cracked slightly as he spoke up

"General."

His eyes finally met hers. He half expected to find something dark and unforgiving, but what he found was quite the opposite. Her eyes were filled with wonder and amazement. Her voice matched the shock that was clearly written on her features

"Look at you."

This was too much. He had dreamed of this moment many times before, but it never occurred quite like this. He didn't expect to find his mother so forgiving - so welcoming. His eyes scanned across her face that was now wrinkled with time and heartbreak. He had broken her, his own mother. He had done this to her, yet she still looked at him with adoration and love.

"My boy. Look at you."

She was inching closer to him slowly as if he would strike if provoked - she wasn't wrong. Ava shuffled next to him, clearing her voice

"I'll uh - I'll give you two a second."

He watched the petite woman leave. It wasn't until the door clicked shut that he met his mother's gaze again, only to quickly look down at his hands in his lap. There was something soft on his face now. He flinched for a second before accepting the touch. His mother hand her hand cupping the side of his marred cheek as she spoke

"Ben, please look at me."

His eyes met hers again. The warm brow eyes that he saw in himself on occasion. His mother's smile was sad as tears streamed down her face.

"You're all grown up."

His heart was pounding in his chest. He never thought it could hurt this much. For once he could feel the light penetrating through the darkness, urging him to say something, anything.

"I-"

The general's head nodded slowly, her eyes never leaving his as she reassured him

"Shhh, it's okay. I know."

He felt like a boy again. Needing his mother desperately to scare away all the monsters, all the dark energy around him. She simply held his hand in hers, granted his hand was much larger now than it used to be, but they sat there nonetheless. This needed to happen. They were far from healed, but it was a start. He got carried away in the peace that he almost forgot why he was here to begin with. Quickly he turned snapped his head to look down at his mother.

"Where's Rey?"

The woman simply let go of his hand to pat his shoulder in a comforting gesture.

"She's fine. How are you feeling?"

He made a move to get up, but his head screamed at him to stay put. He winced slightly before sitting back down. His mother was now standing in front of him.

"I've been better. How is Rey? Is she going to be okay? I need to see her."

He could feel his heart rate pick up as he continued to struggle to get up. He would fight the pain because he needed to see Rey. He could feel the bond flicker briefly as if to say come to me, but his mother was holding him here.

"You need to calm down. "

The lightness that surrounded him mere seconds ago was replaced by the darkness as he demanded

"No, I need to see Rey now."

His eyes must have said more than words could because his mother - the stubborn general - acquiesced as soon as he stood up. Her hands raised as she nodded calmly.

"Okay, okay."

—

Ava sat quietly In the hall as she waited for the general to reemerge. She watched Rey's friends pace down the long hall, their faces wrecked with worry. The young man with perfectly disheveled locks looked the most concerned. She tried to stay calm as she kicked back on a cold metal bench. Freaking out wouldn't help much. She wasn't necessarily freaked out, more shocked than anything. She half expected Rey to never wake up again and she definitely didn't expect to witness the reunion of the general and her estranged son. The look on the former supreme leaders face said it all. Truthfully, she was surprised he could express such emotion. It wasn't until she heard a door slide open that her attention was brought back to the room around her. All eyes show to the door that the general had just emerged from, her eyes void of emotion as she spoke

"He wants to see her."

The disheveled man in pilot's gear strode over to the general in one solid step and began to speak, the worry evident in his voice.

"You're not actually going to let him near her are you? For all we know, he could have done this to her."

Did he really blame Kylo for this? There was a point in time where she would have blamed him too, but she knew for a fact that he didn't do this. Before she could control it, she was speaking her mind

"He didn't."

Heads craned to look at her for the first time. Everyone seemed deeply confused save for Finn and Rose who already knew who she was. However, the pilot was not informed.

"I'm sorry who is she?"

She cleared her voice before responding as best she could

"Ava. I'm a friend of Rey's and as much as I dislike him, he didn't do this. He adores her. He's the one who carried her out of that place and made sure she didn't bleed out."

She made eye contact with the pilot, his own brown eyes squinting as he looked her up and down. He gave her a short nod before turning back to face the general.

"Okay, I believe you but what about his mental state? No offense general, but your son isn't the most stable person we know."

Leia's face was soft as she nodded in approval

"No, I agree. I'm not sure how… sane he is at the moment."

Finn was the next to speak up, he must really hate this guy. He always approached the topic of Kylo Ren with anger

"So we do a psych evaluation? He should be locked up for everything he's done!"

The general shook her head and let out a soft sigh before explaining

"That won't help. Ben has never coped well with being sent away. Trust me."

Ava was beginning to grow impatient. She knew Kylo was dangerous, but these people were being a little too cautious. What did they have to lose? Well, besides their whole base. Nevertheless, she found her voice again

"Why don't you just give him what he wants? What's the harm in him seeing Rey? They have been together this whole time without combusting or whatever the hell you think is going to happen."

The girl known as Rose finally quipped up as well, practically agreeing with her

"Rey asked to see him as well."

The general's eyes were beginning to show emotion again. There was no doubt she loved her son, but she also had obligations to uphold, especially if she were to remain credible as a leader. The pilot looked at her before he let out a sigh. He was struggling too. Struggling not to offend the general more than necessary. He spoke firmly

"No one is going to approve of this. They are going to demand his arrest and more than likely his execution."

Leia's head nodded in response, she was beginning to move away from the door and down the hall

"I know. That's why we need to get him out of here as soon as possible."

They were going to separate them. This would tear the two force users apart. It was probably the best thing they could do, and it definitely would help move their plan along. They needed to be separated, she though to herself, but her heart wouldn't let her accept it. She had grown fond of Rey, almost as if she were a sister.

"You're not even going to hear him out? I thought you guys were the good ones"

The general turned on her, approaching her for the first time. She was a foot away as she tried to explain.

"We are not going to hear him out here. The fact that he is still here is concerning enough. No one has leaked anything?"

The pilot looked over a data pad he had tucked under his arm before responding

"No. The only public thing is that Rey has returned in critical condition."

Leia looked into each of their eyes, taking a longer glance at Ava as she commanded

"Keep it that way. For the mean time, we need to get Ben to cooperate which is going to be harder than you think, trust me."

Before anyone could say anything, she found herself compelled to say

"Leave that up to me."

—

That's where she found herself moments later. Slowly entering the room where a very anxious Kylo Ren awaited her arrival. He was turned away from her as she entered, her footfall silent from years of being an assassin. She cleared her throat before speaking

"Kylo?"

He turned on her quickly, his face surprised. Clearly he wasn't expecting her, but it didn't stop him from getting answers

"Ava? What did they say?"

He was a large man, and strong enough to snap someone's neck with a simple flick of the wrist, never mind what he was capable of with the force. She took a step back, holding her hands up as if showing submission to a large animal. She didn't doubt her ability to take him down, but force users such as himself were incredibly unpredictable.

"Easy big guy, you need to relax. Trust me. They're talking about transferring you someplace off world."

He resigned, leaning back against a nearby wall.

"Because I'm a threat."

She was about to agree before she looked into his eyes. He didn't seen quite as scary anymore. He was more broken than anything and the fact that she was only seeing this now unnerved her to some extent. She wanted to hate him and all his wickedness, but she couldn't find it in her to do so at the moment.

"Because your life is at steak if people figure out the ex supreme leader is here."

He stood firm. The flicker of vulnerability gone from his eyes, replaced with something more demanding as he insisted

"I'm not leaving without Rey."

She gave a quick nod in response

"I know. Once she is stable enough, they are going to allow her to come along."

She watched his jaw clench and unclench along with his fists, clearly that wasn't the right thing to say.

"Stable enough? I thought they said she was okay?"

She tried to soften her tone as much as she could. She had heard rumors of his tantrums and did not want to witness one for herself.

"She is. She just needs to rest right now. She lost a lot of blood."

The same flicker of light filled his eyes again

"I know."

She shook her head and managed to give him a small smile as she promised the dark lord

"Look, I don't see anything bad happening. This is our chance to take down Snoke. If we have the resistance baking us and if you cooperate, this could all be over very soon."

His dark hair fell into his eyes as he nodded his head.

"Okay. Okay, I'll do what they want. Just make sure Rey is okay."

She held his eyes as she swallowed

"Okay."

—

She was out the door as soon as she could. Her heart was pounding in her chest as she crept down the hall and into a remote area covered In darkness. As soon as she was sure she would not be heard, she pulled out her comm and pressed the button. Her breathing was still labored as she whispered in a hiss

"I don't like this Max."

A distinctly male voice replied. He sounded annoyed and a tad tired as he scoffed back

"Don't tell me you're starting to like them."

She let a long sigh out, pinching the bridge of her nose as she replied honestly

"They're not as bad as I thought. They're real people."

The voice that came back was firm and harsh, holding no remorse.

"They're trained killers and too powerful for their own good. How is the girl?'

Something within her felt bad for reporting what she was, but she needed to. This was part of her mission.

"She's fine for now. Took a nasty blow to the stomach, but she's recovering."

"It's a shame it didn't take her out. It would make our job a lot easier."

She swallowed the lump in her throat as she agreed

"Yeah."

Max's voice came across softer this time. He was still remotely pissed, but he seemed to understand why she was so upset more so now than he initially did

"Ava, doll. I need you to stop leading with your heart and start thinking with your head. Once the force users are out of the way, we can finally do what we said we would do. Now be a good girl and finish what you started. Kill the boy first."

"Yes sir."

"I love you."

"I love you too."


	15. The Great Escape

She was surrounded by darkness. She cursed the bloody drugs they had pumped into her system causing her to feel so out of control. The dream she was thrown into was just as dark as the drug induced slumber they sent her in, but this time she was freezing cold. Her feet were bare as she waded through a shallow stream of water. Black cave walls met her on both sides as she shifted towards something… someone. As she edged closer, the figure seemed to become more clear. A tall man with broad shoulders and long raven colored hair stood with his back to her. Ben? Her feet started to carry her faster and faster until she was a few feet away. She watched as her hand reached for his shoulder to turn him around. His body stated to shift and for the first time she realized his lightsaber was drawn.

He didn't swing it towards her, but instead used it to illuminated the dark cave. As he turned to face her fully, she instantly grew aware of the crimson liquid staining the front of his shirt. His hand dropped the lightsaber next to him in order to hold it to his chest instead. The deep scarlet blood was pooling around his fingers and dripping to the ground in front of him. He took one step towards her before falling onto his knees and crumbling to the ground in front of her. Her heart leaped in her chest as her knees hit the ground, hands quickly working to stabilize the large man that was Ben Solo. As soon as she got him onto his back, her left hand darted to his neck, checking desperately for a pulse. When she was met with nothing, it seemed as if the world was fading around her. Dead. Her bond mate was dead. Nothing could replace the empty hole that pierced through her heart and left a gaping hole in its place. Arms and legs dropped limply as she fell next to him. Her throat protested as she screamed out at the top of her lungs

"No!"

The darkness was replaced by light and the pain she felt in her chest had dissipated significantly, now replaced by a pair of hands squeezing at her arms instead. Her eyes flew open instantly, but they were still covered in a layer of fog. She could vaguely make out a distinctly male voice try to calm her down as she tried to sit up.

"Hey easy, easy. You're safe."

Her heart almost leapt out of her throat as she began to make out a mop of dark locks. A smile started to play on her lips as she relaxed back into the over-stuffed pillow behind her. Her voice came out breathy and light when she spoke again.

"Ben?"

There was a moment of silence before the man cleared his throat. She blinked a few more times, adjusting to the brightness of the room. It seemed she had jumped the gun in assuming the man would be Ben. Instead she was met with a confused and slightly hurt looking Poe Dameron who shifted in the chair next to her.

"No. Ummm… it's me. How do you feel?"

Rey coughed a few times, holding her stomach with her hand so she wouldn't burst any stitches before she was able to reply.

"Fine. Where is everyone."

She didn't miss the skeptical look Poe gave her, but he seemed to let it go as he replied, waving his hand as if to show how casual the whole situation was as a whole.

"Don't worry about them. They're handling a situation that came up."

Her eyes hardened onto the pilot before she raised a single eyebrow

"You mean they're handling him."

Poe was now standing and admittedly pacing around the small room. She watched him freeze before he let out a long sigh and turned back around to face her.

"Yes, but you don't have to worry about that anymore. You just have to focus on getting better, okay?"

A warm hand squeezed her own chilly one and for once she accepted the gesture. She had friends, Friends who cared for her and that's more than she could hope for at the moment. She gave a small nod back to him

"Okay."

He squeezed her hand one more time before letting it go completely.

"Okay. Do you need anything?"

She was ready to refuse his offer, to let him watch over her. It was tempting to just sit back and relax, especially when her wound still felt like it was on fire, but she knew they had Ben held somewhere nearby. They had to or else they risked exposing him to the rest of the base. He needed to stay hidden, she understood that, but she needed to see him. She needed to make sure he was okay. She needed to follow her masters orders. She needed him near, so that's why she responded with

"Actually water would be nice. Maybe something to eat? I don't remember the last time I ate something."

Poe got up quickly, making a dramatic scene in response

"Yeah, sure. Coming right up my lady."

She let out a small laugh as he bowed for her.

"Thanks Poe."

He smiled back before heading towards the exit, He was practically there when he turned back around on his heels

"Oh, I almost forgot. They saved this for you, said it was on you when you came in."

The small circle of medal was cold in her hand. She rolled the slim band nervously between her fingers as Poe looked down at her in confusion. When she looked back up, the look on his face had vanished, replaced by a small smile instead. He gave her one last Poe Dameron wink before clicking the door shut behind him. Taking a deep breath, Rey counted to ten before shifting in the bed. She had to find him. The band was slipped onto her ring finger once again before she could overthink it. Her feet met the cold concrete floor softly. She tested the pressure of her feet on the floor, trying to find balance before she started to creep towards the door. However, she was still restrained by the chords connecting to her hand and another to her arm. Carefully, she pulled the needles loose from her skin. Blood began to slowly drip down her left hand, but she could care less at this point. Instead, she inced closer and closer to her only escape route.

The door knob felt heavier than she expected as she twisted it clockwise. She flinched briefly at the temperature of the metal knob. Force, everything was so cold in here! As soon as she managed to wiggle the door open, she shimmied out into the dim hallway that seemed to stretch for miles in both directions. Taking a deep breath in, Rey let it out slowly before deciding to go right instead of left. Her feet carried her down the long hallway, albeit slower than usual, but she still was creating distance between herself and that force forsaken room. In fact, she had made it halfway down the hall before a pair of strong arms scooped her up off the ground and heaved her over their shoulder. She almost let out a cry as the body carried her back. She was ready to protest, but the familiar voice of her dear friend cut her off before she could even begin.

"Nuh uh, not on my watch peanut."

—

"You won't be safe here much longer."

Ben Solo sat still on an encrochingly unpleasant mattress that only fit about half of his tall frame as his mother spoke to him. Her voice was just as firm and unwavering as he remembered, but her eyes were still filled with that same warm, welcoming pool of brown that felt more like a punch in the gut now considering everything he had done to her. That's why he avoided eye contact with his mother as much as he could, which wasn't very hard considering the height difference. He was surprised to see the general so soon after the events of last night, but he understood that this was an urgent matter. He was even more surprised when she set a hot plate of food in front of him which he still hasn't touched. He tried to distract himself by lacing up his boots that he had removed in attempt to get some sleep. That didn't happen. Now his mother was standing in front of him, arms crossed, waiting for his response. He let out a grunt as he tugged the last lace into place.

"You mean you don't want people to know I'm here."

His mother was a practiced veteran when it came to the many attitudes of Ben Solo - or Solo men for that matter. Her face didn't move an inch at his remark, instead she let out a tried sigh before responding firmly.

"I mean, you don't really have a say in this at the moment Ben. Once we get you secured off planet, we can get something figured out. Rey should be cleared to fly by then too."

That's when he finally looked back into his mothers eyes. The warm pools he always remembered were still there, still welcoming him in as they always did. He shook his head, trying to forget. No, his parents sent him away because he was a monster. A huge brutal monster who needed to be caged because of his dark impulses. His hand ran through his messy locks in order to gain some control over the situation.

"How is she?"

Leia's arms were no longer crossed over her chest, but instead relaxed at her side. Her voice seemed to lose some of it's edge as she explained.

"Better. She should be released any day now, but she should be taking it easy. I brought you something to eat. Please actually touch the food this time and take a shower while you're at it. I'll be back as soon as I can."

She was nearly out of the room when she turned around almost reluctantly. She paused in front of the door

"And Ben?"

His head shot up to look at her as he hummed

"I'm glad you're here."

He thought he couldn't feel any worse than he did, but apparently he was wrong. When his mother said things like that… how was he supposed to respond. Thankfully, she was out of the room before he could think of anything to say, but he still sat there in silence for what felt like a decade before he got up again. Tossing the food to the side, he reached for his jacket. As soon as he was fully dressed, he made a B-line for the door. He almost forgot the petite bounty hunter had entered the room until she spoke up

"Hey, I thought you were supposed to stay put."

Flipping the hood over his head, Ben turned slightly towards Ava as he replied

"Yeah, that was never going to happen."

He was out the door after that, adjusting the straps on his bag just outside the room.

"So what's the plan?"

Part of him wanted to tell her to get lost, but he did not need to piss off anymore bounty hunters. A small sigh escaped his mouth as he looked down the hallways. There was no one in sight, but he still whispered

"I need to find Rey."

Ava's eye grew in size before squinting back at him. She looked him up an down as if he were a mad man before replying tersely

"Yeah, not going to happen."

He was starting to grow impatient and itchy. His foot tapped against the floor as he fidgeted The more time he spent here, the greater risk he had of getting caught.

"Why not?"

"She's in the medical ward and it's heavily guarded at the moment, trust me."

"Okay, then we need to find a ship."

He was moving before she could say another word. He needed to get out of here. Rey would be fine. He knew somewhere in his heart that he would definitely see her again. He just hoped he would be alive when they did.

"Already on it."

The two walked down the hall casually as if they were meant to be roaming around. One or two people passed by, but mostly medical personnel and engineers. Ben was never one for small talk, but for some reason the silence seemed too intense around them. Not to mention he still had a strange feeling about Ava. Rey trusted her just fine, but there was something off about her. Nevertheless, he proceeded to make small talk.

"How's your daughter? It must be nice to have her back."

The woman shifted her gaze to him quickly as if she were surprised he would ask such a question before she cleared her throat and responded

"Yeah, it's really nice I just wish I could spend more time with her. Hopefully we will get things solved soon so I won't have to worry about her anymore than I have to. She's staying with a family here. They told me she would be safe."

She was definitely hiding something. He knew that much for sure, but when she talked about her daughter she seems genuine. He found it really off at first for a bounty hunter to have a child, but he had no room to judge with his father being a smuggler and all. He faltered for a second before stopping completely and turning towards Ava.

"We will put an end to this soon, I promise you."

She gave him a quick nod, not meeting his eyes fully, before she turned around and pointed just ahead of them.

"There's a ship this way. I scouted one out earlier in case this place didn't end up being so … welcoming."

They were nearly there. No one had stopped them yet, not that there were many people down here to begin with. The ship was a small one, probably used to transport people from bases, but it would have to do.

"So, where to?"

Ben feels the lump in his throat forming already. He swallows quickly before responding

"To Snoke hopefully."

Ava stops dead in her tracks next to him. They just arrived to the craft, but her voice keeps him from moving any further.

"Hold on. This is a suicide mission?"

He can't manage to look her in the eyes, so instead he focuses on his own shoes. As he makes his way up the small ramp, he shouts back over his shoulder.

"It's not a suicide mission if I come back alive."

He was ready then and there to close the door and head out on his mission when Ava raised her voice, running halfway up the ramp to make sure he didn't leave without hearing her out first.

"Wait Kylo! Are you sure about this?"

A sigh escaped him as he ran a nervous hand through his locks. Of course he wasn't sure about this. He wasn't sure about half the decisions he ever made, but he needed to convince everyone else that he was sure of this. His voice wavered slightly as he tried to explain his actions as best as he could

"I can't just wait around and wait for something bad to happen. I need to put an end to this now before it gets too out of hand."

Ava's eyes were penetrating as she searched his face for any signs of distress. He was far too experienced with hiding his emotions from others for her to pick up on anything. Her gaze was hard as she responded

"What about Rey? I thought you loved her!"

A shot to the soul. That's what it felt like. He should have expected as much, but it still took him by surprise. He composed himself before responding softly

"That's why I need to do this."

When Ava didn't respond, he made a move to his right. His hand reached into the bag at his side, flipping through until he caught a stray piece of paper, wrinkled and dirty. Ben pulled it out carefully, making sure it was still folded shut as he handed it out to the woman before him.

"Look, if I don't make it back would you give this to her for me?"

—

Ava reluctantly took the paper Kylo had handed to her and watched him proceed to flee the base. She stood silently watching until the craft was completely out of sight and then some. Something inside of her tugged and pleaded with her not to let him do this, to do the right thing, but she needed to follow through with her plan. She needed to make a better life for herself - for her family. Force users would just get in the way of that, no matter how human and real they seemed. They proved to be reckless and brutal when they wanted and that was something she would not risk. There was no one in the hallways as she made her way slowly back towards the medical ward. She couldn't let them know she aided Ben Solo in his escape. As she strolled through the dimly lit hall, she pulled out her com link and typed in her code. She spoke as soon as she knew he was listening.

"Things are going better than I expected. Solo is on a suicide mission after Snoke where they'll likely kill each other."

She heard his voice hum in approval before he responded.

"Good. And the girl?"

"Still in the medical ward. I'm on my way there now."

"Very good. Set up for phase two and contact me if anything happens."

Ava felt a small smile tug at her lips. Everything was going just fine. No one had a clue as to their inevitable end, her daughter was safe and her husband was pleased with her. Her smile grew as she affectionately replied

"Yes my love."

As soon as she neared the corner, she ran straight into something- or rather someone. She blinked a few times in shock before recognizing the person as one of Rey's friends- Rose. Her hair was sticking up as if she had just woke up from a deep sleep and her eyes were crazy as she addressed her

"There you are! Where have you been?"

She composed herself, letting her smile fade quickly before she began to play her part. She needed to nail this or else they would begin to grow suspicious. She was just with Solo after all.

"I had to get a change in scenery or I would go crazy. Why? Did something happen?"

Rose motioned for her to follow her as they weaved through the hallway and back to a secured room. She spoke quickly as if she were in a constant state of anxiety.

"Rey got loose, but she's back in the medical ward now. Unfortunately Kylo Ren got away."

Ava acted as shocked as she could, reaching in her pocket where she had stuffed the letter that Kylo had handed her. She smoothed it out before holding it out to Rose.

"Shit, I figured something like this would happen. I found this letter on his bed, but he wasn't there. I think he went after Snoke."

—

Hux stood calmly on the command bridge, overseeing the shipment of weapons that was supposed to come in nearly twenty minutes ago. He was starting to grow impatient, but this was a common occurrence as of late. His eyes locked on the craft as it entered it's designated spot and his blood pressure finally started to decrease. That was until one of his men approached him. The soldier was stiff and had a worried curve to his brow as he spoke.

"Sir, we have an incoming ship."

Hux practically rolled his eyes as he let an over exaggerated sigh escape his mouth. He simply did not have time for this. He had more important things to oversee.

"Yes, and? You do not need to inform me every time a craft enters the station. I am not-"

The man cut him off before he could continue.

"Sorry sir, but this is urgent."

This man would be punished severely if this turned out to be nothing. He could feel his gloved hands clench at his side before unclenching. He replied through gritted teeth.

"It better be."

The man was now sweating and his eyes darted around wildly as if he were expecting something to jump out and devour him. He responded just as frantically

"It appears to be a resistance issued vessel."

This was surprising, but not all together as urgent as the soldier was making it seem. Whoever the pilot was, they must be insane or on a suicide mission.

"Resistance? Only a fool would do something so daring. Have you identified the pilot yet?"

The man was even sweatier now and Hux could practically hear his heart pounding through his chest from where he stood.

"It's-um… it's Kylo Ren sir."

There it is. That's the urgent news he was waiting for. He had to admit, his own heart stopped for a second at hearing what the man had to say. Ren must be desperate if he has returned. Well, either that or he has finally gone completely insane. Either way, Hux had to think fast.

"Lock down the hanger at once! Make sure he does not try anything! I'm on my way."

He wasted no time darting down to the hanger bay where red would shortly arrive - likely in a state of rage. Hux clicked away at his commlink as quickly as he could

"Supreme leader, we have a situation. It seems Ren has returned. What am I to do with him?"

Snoke's voice seemed stronger now, but still raspy as he responded

"Bring him to me."


	16. Heart Break and Warfare

Ben didn't know what he expected upon arrival, but he certainly was not happy with what he was met with. He would recognize that neat ginger hair and smug smirk anywhere. It pained Ben more than anything to deal with the weaselly twat that came in the form of Armitage Hux, but if he wanted to get to Snoke he would have to go through Hux first. As soon as he exited his ship - borrowed ship- he was met by a swarm of stormtroopers, each holding weapons trained on him. He could practically smell the fear these troopers emited as if it were a pungent perfume in the air. Good. They should be scared. He was beginning to receive a high from all the responses in the force around him until his eyes landed on Hux.

The man was decked out in the most lavish display of black apparel Ben could imagine followed by the same snarky smug he always wore. Part of Ben wondered if this was what it was like to have a sibling, or step sibling maybe. He was glad he was an only child. It saved him from having the unpleasant conversation as to why he murdered his own brother. Hux approached briskly and as dramatically as ever. It made Ben want to throw up.

"Ren. So nice of you to make it really, but you are no longer needed. In fact, if I remember correctly there are orders out to shoot you down on sight along with your little Jedi lackey. So please do enlighten me as to why you think you can stroll in here like nothing happened? You look abysmal by the way."

He didn't even flinch when the troopers inched closer to him, weapons now pointed to his head and heart for kill shots. They weren't going to kill him or else they would have done so already. He knew Snoke wanted to see him and they would be foolish to go against his orders. He could feel the dark tentacles of Snoke's force signature beckoning him to come to him. Letting his eyes lock on Hux, he gave him a smug smile as he spoke.

"Nice to see you too Armitage, but spare me the details. I know full well what is going on here and I want to see Snoke. So I suggest you do as your told like the little task boy you are and take me to him or else you're going to have a whole lot of cleaning up to do."

"Very well."

He was expecting more of a fight really, but he was met with little to no resistance. Something wasn't right here. There was a divergence, something off about this whole situation. As regret began to settle deep in his stomach, Ben tried his best to push it down. He needed to focus on the mission at hand. He didn't have time to doubt anything now when he was in the thick of it. With a slight nod of his head and a wave, Hux motioned for the soldiers to lower their weapons and move out of the way besides the exception of two guards who followed behind Ben. They pushed him forward to follow Hux out of the hanger and into a hallway where they were met with an elevator. Once they were inside, Hux opened a panel on the wall and pressed the button, lowering them down to the last level.

Once they had entered the dark room, Ben was instantly aware of the large presence of guards surrounding them. Maybe Snoke had learned something from their last encounter after all. The room itself was dimly lit and had a strange green hue to it, but the feeling was something else completely. Something dark and nefarious took hold of Ben through the force and squeezed. He felt his body moving before he could do anything to stop it. He was dragged across the room much like Rey was on the Finalizer until he was face to face with Snoke again. Well, what was left of Snoke really. His former master was just as wrinkled and grotesque looking as he had been before, but he was sitting in a large tub of what he assumed was bacta by the smell of it. The strangest thing was that his body was still cut in half, but the lower half was still missing. His body itself was hooked up to a series of machines and wires.

"What is this?"

Ben felt something inside him grow cold just looking at Snoke. His head was beginning to scream as he fought off the darkness threatening to drown what little ounce of light he had left within himself. He tried not to flinch when Snoke finally spoke.

"The future, young Solo. You see, my body was always too weak to utilize my powers properly. You were the safest bet, being built like a tank, but I'm afraid your affinity for the light stood in the way. You have your father's heart, but Armitage… now he has the guts. So naturally, he was the better match."

That's when it all happened. Hux had strapped a portion of the machine to himself and the other end connected to Snoke as he pulled a lever. They were both submerged in light, almost like a lighting storm. Ben had to look away until it faded away completely. When he looked back, he was met with two unconscious figures. Did they just… what the hell just happened. Ben almost thought he was dreaming until Hux gasped, eye flying wide open. He had no idea what he had just witnessed as he looked between the two. Snoke was definitely dead in the bacta tank and Hux was now standing before him as if nothing had happened at all. He was beginning to think everyone had gone completely insane until he felt the same wicked force signature that he would know anywhere.

"No, that's impossible."

Ben looked deep into Hux's eyes, but all he saw were his former master's instead. Then he was hit with a wave of nausea and panic that he hadn't felt in ages. His stomach clenched and he felt as if he were shot in the head as Snoke's tentacles wrapped around his memories and rippled through his mind with ease. No, not this time. Ben pushed back and forced him out before he could get anymore out of him.

"Ahh Ren, ever the alpha male. Not very good at being submissive now are we. How I've waited for this moment. Solo, you will kneel before your new Supreme leader."

It was strange really. Hux's body, but the force powers that Snoke had possessed. This was definitely not how he thought today would go, but he had no way out now. Instead, he reached for his saber at his side and ignited it in a flourish as he growled out

"Over my dead body."

Hux gave him a wicked smile before infighting what he assumed was a handcrafted lightsaber that Snoke had, but never used - at least not in front of him. It was a deep red, almost back that dulled the green hue of the room.

"Be my guest."

—

Rey was plopped back down on her cot in the medical ward before she could protest. Finn moved fast as if she would combust any second. He made sure to clean up the dried blood that streamed down her arms from her I.V.'s before handing her a cup of water and tray of food that Poe was supposed to be getting. He then took up the seat next to her and gave her a pointed look as he crossed his arms over his chest. She nearly scoffed at that, but instead settled for an exaggerated sigh.

"Don't look at me like that. You don't understand Finn I-"

He cut her off before she could continue. Concern was laced in his voice as he spoke.

"I do, I really do peanut, but I also understand that taking just one blow to the gut could mean a relapse and possibly death for you. I'm sorry, but we cannot risk losing you - losing the last Jedi."

She understood what he was saying, but she also knew that she had orders that weren't from him. She knew the risks, but she also knew that her being surrounded by Ben was not going to hurt. In fact, Luke had insisted she find him and never leave his side.

"What if I told you I talked to Luke."

She didn't miss the crease in Finn's eyebrows and the way he reached out to feel her head for a fever before he realized she was not crazy or running a fever.

"What do you mean? Like through the force?"

Force! It was hard to explain the force to non-force users. Instead of expelling to him that that is 'not how the force works,' Rey just bit her lip and nodded.

"Kind of."

At least Finn was invested now. He was always a curious person, but he was also a reasonable man. She knew he believed her.

"What did he say?"

Rey was about to launch into how Luke Skywalker came to her in her weird drugged out state and told her that she should stick to Ben Solo like glue or else something horrible could happen. That was until Rose burst through the door.

"Guys we have a problem!"

Finn looked into Rey's eyes for a second as if to say she wasn't off the hook yet before he let out a dramatic sigh.

"What now?"

Rose was out of breath as she spoke, but it was clear she was worried and a tad bit panicked as she tried to explain the situation.

"Kylo Ren made a break for it, and by that I mean he escaped."

Both Finn and Rey widened their eyes as they shouted at the same time.

"What!"

Rose finally looked towards Rey who was sitting up in bed, covers forgotten on the floor. Her panic was forgotten for a moment as a gentle smile spread across her face.

"Oh Rey you're up. How are you feeling?"

Now was not the time. Rey set her jaw and stared into her friend's eyes as she questioned

"Fine. Where did he go?"

Rose was so caught off guard by the change in her mood that she complied with no hesitation.

"Ava said something about Snoke and the First Order."

She was furious. Something that didn't come naturally to her, but something she was not unfamiliar with. She shouldn't be surprised that Ben had something to do with her lingering anger, but she still found herself standing on her feet and demanding

"And you just let him?"

Rose's eye drifted between her and Finn as she tried to figure out the best way to respond.

"Well, yes - I mean no. No one had any idea that he took off until it was too late."

There was no cooling her down now. Rey was past the point of containing the anger that was sparking inside of her. She had spent the last couple years apart from Ben trying to find ways to calm herself in these situations, but all of that was out the window now.

"And where is the general? Where is Ava?"

There was a flash of something out of the corner of Rey's eye followed by the familiar voice.

"Right here. I'm sorry Rey. He left this for you."

In Ava's hand was a white piece of paper that was folded neatly, but crumpled up as if were stuffed away somewhere for a long time. On the front was her name written neatly in black ink. Ava was extending the letter to her, a sad look in her eyes as she refused to look away. Rey reluctantly took hold of the letter, holding it limply in her hand as Rose continued to explain the rest of Rey's question.

"And as for the general. Her and Poe are trying to figure something out."

She had discarded the letter to her bed, not willing to open it just yet.

"We need to go after him. He can't take them out on his own, not when Snoke is back."

This was definitely news to both Finn and Rose. They exchanged a silent conversation between each other before turning to look at Rey. Their eyes were filled with something akin to shock.

"Snoke is back?"

Rey nodded once, taking a breath before she leaped into explaining what she initially came here to do before she got injured. The situation was dire now and they needed to work fast if they were going to try to save Ben and the fate of the galaxy.

"Yes, but I thought we had agreed not to do anything alone until we had discussed it with you guys. I should have known he would do something like this. This is what Master Luke was trying to warm me about."

Her friends were even more baffled now. This time Ava was just as surprised as they were.

"Luke?"

"He told me to stay close to him. That something bad was going to happen. I could have stopped this. We need to go after him as soon as possible."

When she was finally done explain all she had to explain, she gave her friends a moment to let it all sink in before saying anything else. Not that she had anything else to say really. Rey sat patiently and watched as their expressions turned from shock to understanding and then to slight panic. Finn was the first to stand up

"Okay yeah. I'll contact Poe and let him know what's going on."

He was out the door the second the words fell out of his mouth. Eyes turned to him as he scurried out of the room before they turned back to her. She had taken a seat on her cot again, right next to the stark white letter that literally had her name on it. She felt like she was having a staring match with the thing before Ava's voice broke through

"Are you going to read it?"

Rey kept her eyes glued to the letter as she whispered back a reply.

"I don't know."

Truthfully, she didn't know if she should open the letter. Part of her wanted to know what he had to say to her, but another part - the part of her that struggled against abandonment - told her to protect herself, that opening the letter would only hurt.

"I think you should. We'll give you a moment."

"Okay, yeah, thank you."

The two women cast her saddened looks before quietly exiting the room and giving her space to read the letter addressed to her. She reached out slowly, her fingers tracing the beautiful script of her name on front before she started to unfold it. It took her a moment to start reading, but once she started, there was no way she was going to stop.

Rey,

If you're reading this, then there's a good chance I'm already dead. You were right. You're always right. If we want to live in peace, we need to take out Snoke for good. I can't explain it, but there is a war waging inside of me. It's been waging all my life. Something that cannot be quenched until I personally see to his demise. I know it sounds crazy, but I think this is the only way I can fulfill my destiny and make things right. I hope the day comes when I can see you again, but if it does not I want you to know that you have been everything to me. I know that I've hurt you and I know that I do not deserve you, but you have been the only thing in my life that has given me purpose. You are the only person I've ever felt connected to - the only person who understands me. That is why you need to survive. You are so incredibly strong Rey, and I trust you will restore the galaxy once things blow over at the First Order. Maybe this is what I was meant to do all along. I know this could cripple you through the bond, but you are far stronger than I ever was so I know you will survive this. You are the strongest woman I know. May the force be with you Rey, always.

Ben.

She couldn't stop it - the feeling that her heart had fallen out of her chest and shattered before her - she couldn't stop it. Her eyes had filled to the brim with tears that now cascaded down her face in a constant flow. She wanted to curse the galaxy, curse fate, but all she could do was stare at the only piece of Ben Solo she had left. He wrote elegantly for a trained warrior, his writing almost too neat, and the words….oh the words hurt worst of all. She had no idea how to express the pain in her chest right now.

"Rey? Are you alright?"

Rose's voice cracked as she entered the room. Rey hardly realized she had placed a hand onto her knee until she looked up to she her friend right beside her. An eager tick ran through her. She could still stop this, she could still save him. Maybe it was his fate to kill Snoke, but it was her fate to save Ben Solo.

"Bring me to see him. I need to see him before he gets himself killed."

—

Poe was shocked when he first heard everything. He spent minuted trying to decipher what to make of it, what they should do next, but thankfully Leia beat him to it. She had formulated a plan quickly and he only hoped it worked. They were out of the base without a second to lose. That's where he found himself now. Flying his trusty X-Wing with BB8 next to the ship that his friends occupied. They were finally going to do it. Take out the first order. He would be lying if he said he wasn't at least a little nervous. He had a whole squadron to lead behind him that he vowed to protect. This was it. He shot a quick glance to BB8 who beeped nervously.

"It's going to be okay buddy."

He was checking over all the necessary panels when his com came to life. Finn's voice was on the other line.

"Are we sure about this?"

Poe knew what he meant. He wasn't so much concerned for the mission, but more for Rey. She had only started to recover and they were all worried she wouldn't be able to hold her own in a fight at the moment. Especially against Snoke, but they needed to trust her. Poe hated this, but they needed to have faith.

"She will be fine."

"That's not what I'm taking about. Are you sure we can beat them."

"As sure as we can be."

"Yeah that's not very helpful!"

—

Ben was surprised by the force behind the blows Hux took at him. He dodged and parried expertly, but the little ginger was quick. His lightsaber collided hard with Ben's own crackling blade in a blaze. He was drenched in sweat now from the heat of the weapons as Hux snarled back at him. Their bladed were crossed menacingly. This was not going to end well.

"You were never strong enough to do what needed to be done! Too blinded by the sliver of light poking through and for that you will die!"

—

They were closer to the First Order base than they realized. As soon as they were in proximity, they were alerted and Poe's team took off around them. Leia spoke quickly, commanding as best as she could. Their plan was rushed, but the general held an eerie air of calmness that Rey admired.

"You three take the lower quarters. We believe that is where Snoke is. Ben should be there too. Poe takes the aerial crew. The rest will distract and take out the main security."

Rey looked at a her companions, her team. Ava and Finn both gave her a quick nod of approval before following her towards the escape shuttle that would take them into the base. Rey gave the general one last glance before heading out.

When they landed, they were met by chaos. They had sent in soldiers ahead of time in order to create a distraction and allow them to get to the elevator unharmed, but they did not expect this. There were fires and blood everywhere. It was a terrifying sight to say the least. Nevertheless, they moved on, following Rey's lead.

"This way."

They were armed with blasters that they shot off in attempt to clear the area around the elevator they needed. Rey unleashed her saber when they were just in reach, taking out troopers left and right as if it were no big deal. As soon as they were secure in the elevator, Finn slammed the button to close the doors.

"Hit the lower level. There should be a panel here somewhere."

"Found it."

"Punch it."

The elevator moved fast. Rey was glad she refused to eat her meal today, otherwise it would have made for a very unpleasant ride. Still she took deep breaths to try to calm her uneasy stomach. She looked over to her friends who were holding onto the rails for dear life. Finn was starting to look a little green.

"This thing really moves."

Thankfully the ride was short enough and they were on the lower levels in no time. Rey was the first to step out into the dark room. Her eyes locked on the pair of men in the center, red lightsabers clashing against each other in heated combat.

"Ah just in time! Here to see your lover slain before you."

Hux's posh accent rang through the room as he dodged a blow from Ben and proceeded to kick him in the knee. Ava's voice came in next to her

"What the fuck is happening?"

Finn was just as confused as everyone else in the room as he looked at the two men brawl.

"Is that general Hux? I didn't know he had the force."

Rey was surprised to say the least, but she needed to work fast. Ben was starting to look tired as he fought off now only Hux, but his large supply of guards as well.

"Me neither, but there's no time to question it. Here comes the back up."

The guards came at them quickly, weapons at the ready. Rey dodged a blaster directed at her head before shouting.

"Everyone break!"

There were so many. A lot more than there were when Ben and Rey fought last. She took a few blows to the back and chest before taking a hard one to the stomach. She weeded out before swinging back at her assailant, taking his legs out and piercing him in the heart. She tried to keep an eye on the two men fighting it out in the center, both of them landing blows to each other. Ava and Finn seemed to be handling the remaining guards just fine and she had her own battles to fight. Another guard was on her now, but she was quick. Leaping up into a backflip, Rey took the guard by surprise as she took him down.

Her eyes darted back to the men as she watched Hux growl at Ben, taking a cheap shot by kicking him in the groin. Ben fell to his knees.

"Now you finally match your grandfather, just like you always wanted!"

Her eyes widened as Hux's crimson blade moved down at the same time Ben moved to the side, his hand getting caught in the crossfire. She was horrified to see his hand fall to the ground next to him. The rest of the room fell silent as Ava and Finn had taken out the rest of the guards. All eyes were on Ben now as he looked down at his hand detached from his arm. He was in shock. Rey moved quickly before she could witness his demise. Hux had his blade poised and ready to kill as Ben stumbled back trying to create space between them. As soon as Hux's lightsaber came down again, Rey met him with a shot of her own. She aimed her blaster towards his head, which distracted him for a moment before she launched herself at him, piercing her saber into his chest. He fell to the ground in a heaps she shut down her weapon and clipped it to her side.

She was horrified at the mess. At what she had just done, but she would not be able to bare it if Ben had ben the one to meet his death. Not now. Not when she had so much left to say to him. Her body was churning with adrenaline and her whole body seemed to shake as she turned around to see a disheveled Ben staring at her with wide eyes. Hazel met brown in an emotional reunion that neither of them had prepared for. She had saved his life. She watched his eyes fill with admiration, a single tear falling down his cheek as he stared back at her.

"Rey?"

Her heart fluttered in her chest at the sound of his voice. It was weird, but she was under the impression she would never hear it again. There was a fist sized lump in her chest as she stood there shaking and staring at him.

—

"Ben."

Her voice was so gentle, so bright. He couldn't believe she came after him. A warmth settled deep inside of him. So much that he almost forgot he had suffered a serious blow. His left hand lay severed from his arm on the floor, but all he could see was her. He felt his lips break out into a smile at the sight of her. She came for him. He was fully prepared to sprint towards her and pick her un into his arms when he felt his stomach drop. Someone was approaching him quickly from behind, their voice a soft whisper as they spoke.

"I'm sorry."

That's when a blade was rammed through his back. He could see the blade protrude through to his chest as he looked down. Everything seemed to slow down around him as he felt the warm liquid seep from the gaping wound he just received. The blade was pulled lose before he felt his legs give out and he dropped to the cold floor. The last thing he heard was the screeching screams of Rey as she ran across the room to get to him.

"Noooooo!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ouch that ending hurts. I'm so sorry guys, but I promise all will end well. At least I hope it does. Love you all and thank you for your support on both Archive and Fanfiction. It really means a lot. XOXO Violet


	17. Changes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome back my friends! I’m excited for this chapter :D This is kind of a filler chapter for me, but there are elements I need to put down in oder to keep this plot moving forward. More twists and turns to come! Hope you’re all along for the bumpy road and the slooooow burn :P I promise there will be some fun times ahead, but for now we need to get into the real stuff, and by real stuff I mean real raw natural responses to trauma. Also, I’m sorry if I completely botch any medical terms and what not. I’m so excited for what’s next! XOXO

“No, no, no Ben! Stay with me please.”

She was crouched down with him, cradling his head in her hands as she pleaded with the universe. His eyes fluttered a few times as if he were struggling to stay awake, but failing miserably. As much as it pained her, Rey had to close the bond before she felt the same pain he was feeling. She still felt a strange fatigue and soreness in her chest, but she would be able to fight if she needed to. She could hear Finn rushing to meet her as he murmured something directed towards the woman standing in front of them, looking down at Ben’s bloody body.

“What did you do?”

Rey started to feel something spark up inside of her. At first it started like a blooming fire in her chest, but now it scorched and burned every corner of her body. She could feel her ears heat up and her eyes cloud over as she started to stand and face Ava.

“He was on our side.”

Ava was nonchalant about the whole this and this enraged Rey even further. She had possibly killed a man she had spent weeks with getting to know and she didn’t seem to care. 

“I did what I had to. He would have destroyed you eventually anyways.”

Rey’s voice was growing louder now as she started to pace towards the woman she had foolishly and blindly trusted. Her mistake. She shouldn’t have trusted her to begin with. She should have let her die when they found her in the woods.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about!”

Ava didn’t hold back, she inched closer to Rey as if she was fueled by her hate - her pain. 

“Look at you. Look at how angry you are right now. You want to kill me don’t you?”

Ben was the one who was stabbed in the back, but Rey couldn’t help feeling like she had received the same injury. This woman had the nerve to work her way into their circle, to manipulate and coerce them into doing things in order to move her own plan along. Rey couldn’t stand this anymore. Something snapped inside her.

“Traitor!”

Every word she said came out in a spitting rage of fire as she inched closer and closer to a breaking point.

“You’ve been a mole this whole time and Ben was the only one who warned me. I should have listened to him.”

Finn’s voice came from somewhere behind her like an echo. Her head was starting to cloud and spin with the amount of anger she was using to fuel herself in the force. It was like a tornado slowly growing. She could feel all her control start to slip as she let Finn’s words sink in.

“Rey, he’s losing a lot of blood. We need to get him out of here.”

She wasn’t screaming anymore. Instead her voice was deathly calm and composed as she snarled.

“Just tell me why you did it. I deserve that much.”

The energy in the room was tense as Ava looked over Rey. She still held that same smug look in her eyes, but she also seemed to be more cautious. She was eyeing Rey carefully as she responded as if she were a bomb ready to combust at any moment.

“He’s a force user. You all are toxic and will be the end of everyone if you’re not stopped.”

Everything was starting to make sense to her now. 

“You planned on me dying in the medical ward. You planned all of this.”

Rey’s eyes locked onto the woman in front of her now. There was something that sparked in her eyes, something mischievous that Rey had a bad feeling about. Her gut told her something bad was about to happen - something that would possibly change the course of things.

“Finn call the fleet.”

That’s when she felt it. The cry through the force followed by the calm serenity of someone passing on. The feeling was familiar now. It was the same feeling she experienced when Luke had died. She looked behind her to see Finn still working on stopping Ben from bleeding out. He was still alive. If he was still alive then that means-

“It’s too late sweetheart. The ship is gone along with your precious general.”

How did they miss that? They had everything planned out, everything except this. The ship should have been protected. This was not happening.

“No. No, you’re lying!”

She felt the words come out of her mouth, but she knew the truth already. The anger that a had been building up finally broke. It was like a dam that had been filled to the brim, finally bursting. Rey felt all the pain and hurt of the last few hours take over. It was like she was a whole new person. She could feel the scream pierce through the room and ricochet off the walls as she ignigted her lightsaber and flung herself towards Ava.

Her swings came sharp and powerful. It was almost as if she had a new sense of energy, a newfound purpose. The feral anger took her closer and closer until she managed to get a blow in at Ava. Her fist connected with the other woman’s jaw before she swept her legs out from underneath her. She had the high ground now. She was hovering above the other woman, ready to thrust her blade through her chest when a voice cut her off.

“Rey, wait!”

It was too late. She didn’t even hesitate as she followed through. She was filled with a warmth and strength as she thrust her blade through Ava’s chest. Her death was quick and painful. Rey couldn’t bare to look at the woman any longer. She retrieved her lightsaber and clipped it to her hip before turning around slowly. Her breath was coming in fast and sweat was dripping down her face. Her face was splattered with blood and her hair was falling out of her hair ties. A she turned, her hazel eyes locked onto the deep brown eyes that belonged to Poe. 

He stood looking at her completely mystified. There was a strange sense of freight coming from him as he took in the dead body behind her and her frantic state. His lips moved as if to say something when Finn started to yell.

“I lost his pulse. He’s flatlining!”

“Poe, over here.”

Poe gave her one last once over before turning on his heels and sprinting to Finn’s side. Rey followed close behind. Everything around her seemed to have a haze. She was almost certain she would wake up tomorrow morning and find out all of this had been a horrible nightmare, but deep down she knew the truth. She was inching closer as she heard Finn grunt out

“You need to help me, he’s heavy.”

Poe was helping the other man pick up Ben and carry his limp body to their craft. Poe paused slightly looking at her before whispering.

“Rey?”

She shook her head and lead the way to their awaiting craft in silence. 

“I’ll be fine, let’s just get out of here.”

————

They had pushed the craft into overdrive in order to get Ben back to the base and to the medics on standby. As soon as he was brought into surgery, Rey finally allowed herself to sit down. She tried to get some rest, but every time she closed her eyes she was plagued with images of a deathly pale Ben laying in a pool of blood. Her stomach had similar results. Finn had passed her some kind of fruit earlier, but she hadn’t been able to stomach it. She felt unbalanced and unsteady. The force around her was in a similar frantic state. She felt more dark than light and it was almost painful to admit that she had dived head first into the dark side back on the First Order base. She thought that the feeling would dissipate as soon as the First Order was gone, but she still felt the pull of the darkness deep within. 

Taking a deep breath, she let her lungs fill up before letting out a long sigh. Ben had been in surgery for hours now and they hadn’t heard a word yet. She was beginning to think he had already died and everyone was too scared to tell her because she had already lost so much in the last few hours than she ever had in the majority of her adult life. She let out another loud sigh, making Finn shift in his sleep beside her. After her fifth sigh, Finn woke up completely and headed towards the door, mumbling something about getting her some tea to relax her nerves on his way out. 

Waiting was always hard, but she was used to it. She had waited her whole life after all - so what was a few more hours? Poe walked in and took a seat across from her seconds later. She found it strange that she was never left alone, but she knew it was because her friends were worried. If she was being honest with herself, she was scared to be alone right now. Her emotions had been as unpredictable as the force around her. 

After another hour of silence, the door to the operation room finally swung open followed by a tired looking man dressed in a medical uniform. He ran his hands over his face as he approached Poe and Rey, taking a seat next to Poe before he started to explain.

“He lost a lot of blood, but his arm should be fine -we have already started on a replacement. As far as the more extensive injuries, he should consider himself lucky. The wound to his back just barely missed his heart, but did sever a major artery. If you brought him in any later, he would have bled out.”

Rey listened intently, nodding every once in a while even though she didn’t understand a lot of the medical terms he threw around in between. However, she knew enough to know that they were able to stabilize him. As soon as the man stopped speaking, she quipped up.

“He’s going to be okay then?”

The older man let out a gentle sigh, giving her a sympathetic look before he whispered back

“Not exactly.”

She could feel her eyes grow wide at his words as if prompting him to explain. The doctor gave Poe a look before he turned back to Rey and continued.

“You did save him from bleeding out, but he is going to be out for quite sometime. And even if he does wake up, he will have to go through extensive physical therapy to be able to adjust to a daily routine again. Even then, I’m afraid he will not be able to exert himself at the same physical level as before, maybe not at all.”

It was all too much. She couldn’t even imagine a world where Ben Solo sat still. He was a soldier, a warrior. He wasn’t built to sit still, physically or mentally. She could feel her heart pounding in her chest. She could have stopped this. He could be awake right now. He wouldn’t have to retire from fighting for the rest of his life.

“I understand.”

The doctor set his hand on her knee and gave it a gentle squeeze before standing up. 

“I will keep you updated on any changes, but so far everything looks stable.”

She nodded in response, refusing to look into his eyes. She couldn’t handle the sympathy and pity that he held in his gentle green eyes.

“Thank you.”

She didn’t look up, not even when the door was closed shut. She didn’t look up until Poe rested a hand on her shoulder.

“Hey, you going to be okay?”

She shook it off as best as she could. A small smile was forced onto her lips as she tilted her head to look up at Poe who was standing in front of her now. 

“I’m fine.”

Something washed over his features, but Rey couldn’t bear to have him pity her too. Instead, she launched into a new conversation completely.

“Any news on the general?”

If Poe picked up on her shift in mood, he didn’t mention it. He shifted on his feet for a second before answering.

“Ava was right. The ship was completely obliterated when we were able to get to it.”

Rey slowly stood up, looking into Poe’s eyes as she continued the conversation.

“What do we do now? What can I do?”

He cleared his throat before speaking again. He sounded more official.

“I mean we have to find out who she was working for, but for now you need to rest. You’ve been through a lot already Rey I’m-”

He was trying to shift the conversation back, she knew that, but she didn’t want that to happen - she couldn’t let that happen. Instead, she cut him off briskly.

“Who’s in charge now?”

It wasn’t until then that she noticed he had changed his jacket. There was something different to him too, but she couldn’t put a finger on it. 

“Uh- We took a vote and it looks like it’s going to be me.”

Oh. Oh. She hadn’t taken the time to think of how Poe felt about everything. She had been so worried with Ben and her own feelings that she hadn’t even realized the impact of Leia’s loss on everyone else. She had been like a mother to Poe. Rey allowed herself a moment to look over the man’s features. He was as young and handsome as ever, but the bags under his eyes and the red tinged to his eyes spoke of something else. She felt her voice catch in her throat as she spoke again.

“I- I’m sorry.“

He held her eyes briefly before looking elsewhere. She knew he was hurt, but he obviously didn’t want to burden her with anything more than she had to deal with at the moment. He shrugged it off as best as he could.

“It’s okay. She knew I could do this. It just stinks that it had to be so soon.”

“Yeah.”

There was an almost awkward beat of silence between them before Poe spoke again, hands in his pocket.

“Well uh - I’ll leave you to get some rest.”

“Thank you.”

He was standing in the doorway now looking back at her with that same worried look from earlier.

“Yeah, anytime. Are you sure you’re going to be okay?”

She waved him off before he could continue to protest. All she wanted was some space and a quiet room.

“I’m fine Poe.”

His curly locks bounced as he gave her a brief nod. 

“Okay, I’ll let it slide for now, but we will have to talk about what happened with Ava eventually. I’ve never seen someone snap like you did back there.”

Rey gave him a small smile as if to show him she would be okay before letting out a small sigh and responding.

“Okay, yeah.”

As soon as she heard the small waiting room door click, Rey waited a few ,minutes before following him out the door. However, instead of making a left out the door towards the living quarters, she took a right. The medical ward seemed to be silent except for a few work related injuries and cases of the flu. Rey had never stayed in a hospital or medical center until she had been injured a few weeks ago. She was always able to take care of herself back on Jakku. She had always been cautious when scavenging. One wrong step could mean death for someone like her. She remembered vividly the time she broke her arm while scavenging a larger craft. She had to ration her food for a month in order to purchase pain meds from a local seller. Plutt was not too happy with her lack of items scavenged, but she couldn’t manage anything else with one broken arm. She had eventually healed, but sometimes her wrist still ached from time to time. 

She hadn’t even realized she had stopped in front of a room until she just about ran into the cool metal door face first. She knew who was behind the door without even having to look inside. The force had a funny way of showing one exactly what they needed. It wasn’t necessarily her intention to find Ben, but she would not pass up the opportunity to see him. With a quick look over her shoulder, Rey popped into the room before anyone else could see. They had decided to forgo a name card on the door in hopes of keeping the former supreme leaders identity and location secret. As far as the rest of the world knew, Kylo Ren was dead and Ben Solo had never existed. Rey hesitated a moment before stepping completely into the room.

Ben was propped carefully on a bed in the center of the room. His face was still extremely pale with a slight yellowish tinge to it. His hair was brushed out of his face and flowed around his own like a dark halo. Rey inched closer to him until she was seated securely by his side. There was an intricate looking device strapped to his chest with a series of wires connecting him to machines as well as a mechanical hand secured where his missing one would be. It was strange to see him like this. So vulnerable and childlike. Rey could feel her hand reach out before she could stop it. Her fingers danced through the silky waved of Ben’s raven hair, brushing rouge locks from his face. It felt like an oddly intimate thing to do, but Rey didn’t seem to care. She was never very good at intimacy with others, partially because she was never shown the kind of intimacy they speak of in books. 

Her parents never loved her, so why would anyone else love her? She never expected to feel wanted or needed in her life. That was until she meat Leia. Leia had shown her the love only a mother could supply, and now she was gone. Sure, Poe had been a kind and supporting figure in her life the last few years, but something just didn’t seem right. She wanted to desperately to be able to open up to him the way he had with her, but there was something always holding her back. She knew he would understand, but another part of her said he would not. She cared for Poe, but not in the way he possibly hoped she would. He was a friend and she realized that now - that’s all they would ever be. There was no chance in it ever becoming something more, not now. Not when Ben had worked his way back into her heart. Her fingers worked softly in his hair as she started to speak to the man she hated for years - the man who seemed to ruin everything he touched. Nevertheless, she found herself compelled towards him. She needed him to survive.

“Hey Ben. I know you probably can’t hear me, but we did it - you finally did it. We took out the First Order. Force, I wish you were awake right now. I don’t know what to do. Things have been really tense lately.”

She took in a deep shaky breath before continuing on

“We lost your mom today. Please don’t make me live without you too. You need to get better. I- I need to hear your voice again. Please.”

———

Everything around him was buzzing - his ears were on fire, not to mention the intense pain in his chest. His stomach was far worse off. He felt like he had eaten a month’s worth of rations followed an indecent amount of alcohol. He had to blink a few times to adjust to the horribly intense white lighting in the room, but he was still seeing everything in a strange fog. Ben would have thought he was in some strange force vision until he heard his name called out as clear as day. 

“Ben.”

His body instantly went rigid as he froze where he was standing. A chill coursed it’s way though his body as he felt like he was taken back to a time long ago - a time when he was about half his size with embarrassingly large ears. Turning on his heels, he blinked the last of the fog in his eyes away until he was looking down at his mother.

“Leia? What’s going on?”

His mother looked the same as she had when he met her at the Resistance base, but there was something different. Her eyes were light and she stood taller. There was an air around her that suggested a giant weight had been lifted off of her shoulders. She exuded tranquility and peace, something he hadn’t seen in her for ages. He would’ve gotten lost in the tranquility if it weren’t for his mothers voice cutting through the moment.

“I’m sorry.”

There was so much behind those two simple words - something deep and heart wrenching. He had almost forgotten about the deep aching pain in his chest flowing out towards his spine until that moment. He locked eyes with his mother before he started top panic. 

“What? For what? Where are we?”

Leia held a sympathetic look in her eyes as she reached a hand out to him. She took on of his large hands in her own petite one before giving it a gentle squeeze. Normally he would shake his hand free, but something told him he should listen to her.

“Look around Ben. Feel the energy around us.”

This wasn’t a dream at all. No- this was far worse. He let his hand fall from his mothers to run both hands through his hair. He didn’t know what he expected death to feel like really, but it had to be something like this. He felt strangely anchored to this place, but he also felt a strange pull back towards something else. He turned on his mother, emotion clear in his voice as he questioned.

“That’s impossible. Am I?”

He was relieved to see her shake her head no, but that did nothing for the uneasiness in his stomach. He still felt like there was something that needed to be said - a ball that needed to drop. 

“Not yet. You’re still hanging on. You need to hang on.”

That made a little more sense - explained why he was so conflicted, but he still had questions that needed to be answered.

“Why are you here? Shouldn’t Luke be the one to haunt me or whatever this is?”

“Ben, look at me.”

He had been staring down at his shoes and admittedly anywhere besides his mother’s eyes. He didn’t know if he could accept what he was sure she was going top tell him - he didn’t want to accept it. If he accepted it, that would make him more of a monster. He was sure it would be his fault anyways. Everything seemed to be his fault in this family. He gathered himself enough to finally look at her as he croaked out.

“How?”

She was patient and understanding. She was always so patient. She let out a breath before explaining.

“Our ship was targeted and taken out. It was only a matter of time. I wasn’t getting any younger.”

He gave it a moment to sink in. His mother was dead. His father was dead. His uncle was dead. He had been responsible - in part - for all of their deaths and what was he left with? Nothing. He was alone and somehow that was worse than having to deal with his families cursed legacy. He was the only one left. He was all alone. But was he? His head snapped up suddenly.

“Rey?”

“She’s fine. She was able to get everyone out, including yourself.”

He let out a long breath, pinching the bridge of his nose as he let the anxiety drift away. At least he still had one good thing left. One thing he could still live for. Someone he could make things right with for once in his life. He heard his voice as if it were far off in the distance- breathy and quiet.

“I didn’t expect any less.”

His mother was smiling up at him and dammit he didn’t deserve it, but somehow it felt right. She was finally proud of him. She was proud of him even though he had failed her. He took another step closer before speaking again.

“I’m sorry.”

She took on look at him before motioning for him, her arms wide open as she spoke.

“Come here.”

He entered her embrace without hesitation. Her arms wrapped him up in a tight embrace not allowing him to escape. He felt like a child again as the tears started to well up in his eyes, his head buried in his mothers shoulder as he let go.

“I’m so sorry. I messed up.”

Her hands rubbed gentle circles into his back as she squeezed him tighter as best as she could. He had to fall to his knees in order to match her height.  
“Shhhh it’s okay.”

“No, it’s not. Maybe this is what I deserve. I should die for the things I’ve done.”

Leia pushed his back at that, not rough, but just enough so that she could look into his eyes. She held his face in her hands, wiping away stray tears as she spoke.

“Maybe, but that doesn’t mean it’s your destiny to die now. There are still people who need you- people who still believe in you.”

His head shook side to side like a child as he began to protest.

“I don’t deserve it.”

His mother gave him one last pointed look, gazing straight within his soul as she responded earnestly.

“No, but you deserve the chance to make things right.”

———

It had been a week since the events at the First order base. A week since Rey had left her room at all besides her secret visits to see Ben in the early morning when no one was awake. She would talk to him briefly for an hour and then retreat back to her room to spend the remainder of the day. She held his hand now, looking down at his sleeping form. His face had gained back some color, but he was still healing. Rey squeezed his hand a little as she spoke in a soft whisper. 

“I’m sorry, Ben. I know you think you deserved this, but I don’t believe that. I won’t believe that.”

After that, she was out of the room before anyone could realize she was even there. She had made good use of her time, working on physical strength and twirling her lightsaber in her own quarters. The door remained locked. Finn would stop by around the same time everyday to leave food by her door. Occasionally she would retrieve it after he had left just to let him know she was still alive, but she would hardly eat enough. Truth was, she couldn’t stomach much anymore. Not when there was still danger out there. Not when there was someone trying so desperately to eradicate force sensitives. 

Maybe she would have left her room a week ago, but she was still overwhelmed by the intense dark energy surrounding her. She didn’t want anyone to get hurt. She didn’t want to relive what happened with Ava, but it was eating her up. She hardly slept because her dreams were replaced dark nightmares. Her room was now littered with different articles and images pertaining to the man Ava was working for. She had not been successful in finding him yet, but she had a few names. She worked all day and well into the night, it was growing into something of an obsession. She knew she should stop, but the dark energy inside her told her she needed to keep digging - if not for her than for Ben. She was well into scanning through an article now when Finn’s voice came muffled through the door.

“Rey?”

She didn’t reply. She never replied. Instead she ignored him, but he still managed to make conversation. He was only worried, she knew that, but she couldn’t allow herself to step foot out of this room until she knew who was behind this attack orchestrated against her and Ben Solo - the person who was responsible for the generals death.

“How are you doing?”

No reply.

“Right, well I brought you something it eat. If you want to talk about it, I’ll be here.”

———

When two weeks had passed, Finn’s vists started to become more frequent. She hadn’t made time to see Ben because of that. Also, because she was closer to solving who the mysterious man in charge was. She had narrowed it down to a list of five. 

“Rey, it’s been weeks. Maybe you should get some fresh air or something.”

No response.

“Okay, well I should let you know Leia’s funeral is set for next week. We are redirecting to Naboo.”

Her hands stilled as she let a paper fall to the ground. Leia’s funeral. Of course they would plan a funeral and on Naboo. She always wanted to see Naboo. She wondered if Ben had ever visited his grandmother’s home world. She heard it was breathtaking. A tray clattered to the ground outside her door, taking her out of her day dream as Finn’s sad voice came through.

“Just promise me you’ll eat something okay?”

———

Three weeks had gone by when she finally had a name. Finn visited her everyday, his voice growing more irritated the longer she kept herself locked up. The dark energy was now thriving within her and she had stopped trying to control it. She was too exhausted to fight the darkness now. There was still light there, but it felt more like a tug of war between the two inside her at the moment. She had finally sorted everything through and cleaned up the mess of papers when Finn came for his daily visit.

“Rey we need to talk. I’m really worried about you. I know none of us really understand and you feel guilty about things that went down on the base, but Poe has a funny feeling about all of this.”

She moved to stand behind the door, her back pressed to it as she listened to her friend. When she didn’t reply, he started to grow louder.

“If you don’t come out soon-“

She swung the door open before he could lecture her anymore and faced Finn eye to eye.

“I’m fine Finn.”

Strong arms wrapped around her quickly, pulling her into an embrace. Finn sighed out a sigh of relief as he squeezed her tighter in his arms.

“Force! Peanut, I was so worried. We all were.”

She wiggled in his arms trying to get him to stop squeezing her to death as she weeded out.

“I know, I know. Everything is fine. I just needed time to…. Process.”

With that he released her and instead placed his hands on her shoulders to take in her appearance. He looked her in the eyes with soft expression as he spoke.

“I get it. It’s good to see you.”

She let a small smile play on her lips as she looked back at her best friend. 

“You too. I’m going to go check on some things with Poe okay?”

He gave her a warm smile back and nodded his head before releasing his hold on her shoulders. 

“Okay. Oh hey, the funeral is tonight if you wanted to go.”

“I’ll be there.”

She watched quietly as Finn walked down the long hall, a bit of a skip in his jump now that she was back. She waited in the same place he left her until she watched him vanish completely. As soon as he rounded the corner, she took off in the opposite direction. The holo drive she had felt like it was going to burn a hole in her pocket as she made her way to a more secure location. She knew the base like the back of her hand and was permitted in practically every room given her position in the Resistance. She slipped her key card for her designated location, and maneuvered her way into the room. There were a few people working away at computers, mainly making sure there were no potential threats headed there way, and making sure things were clear to head to Naboo. She gave a small nod to one of the officers who shot her a look. He nodded back as he realized who she was before getting back to whatever task he was working on previously. 

Rey make her way up a small set of stairs and to a large control panel in the center of the room. She was the only one in this section and she hoped it would stay that way. Her fingers moved fast across the board before she plugged in her holo drive. A series of locations popped up, pinpointing certain locations until one flashed blue. This was it. She looked at the name and memorized the coordinates. The dark energy inside of her swirled with approval and excitement. She could feel a wide smile start to form on her face as she started at the map one last time. She was going to put an end to this once and for all.


	18. Run, Run as Fast as You Can

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello my friends! First of all, sorry for making you guys wait but I promise this chapter ends on a happy not :) Yay! Anyways, I hope you enjoy this chapter and start to understand what is going on with Rey. She is dealing with some challenges and will be for a few more chapters, but I think a certain someone will be able to help out with that. Questions will be answered and things will get more interesting! Thank you so much for hanging around and reading this story, it really means a lot! XOXO

“What do you mean she’s gone?”

Poe had been up to his ears in files since the bomb dropped on him that he was elected to take over after Leia’s unfortunate passing. He had been thrilled at first, but by now he was exhausted. With harboring a comatose Kylo Ren in his medical wing to trying to hunt down a possible lead on the assasin who obliterated half their fleet - Poe Dameron was all out of fuel. By the time Finn had burst into his office unannounced to declare the news that Rey was nowhere to be seen - he almost collapsed. He did not need anything else to add to his plate. No thank you, his plate was plenty full at the moment - overflowing really if he thought about it - but this was Rey. As much as he tried to distance himself, he loved the girl to death. 

After all, he had planned to spend a very long time alongside her. That future was far gone now considering the way she was connected to Kylo Ren. He couldn’t even begin to understand what it was that connected them, but seeing her in the same room - seeing the way her beautiful hazel eyes fill with despair when he was hurt - he accepted that she was never his to begin with. So that’s where he found himself moments later - listening carefully to his best friend explain in a panic what he discovered.

“I went to check on her this morning to make sure she was alright after Leia’s funeral, but she was gone. I thought maybe she went out to get some air or get something to drink, but I checked back a few times and she hasn’t returned.”

Poe let his head drop into his hands as he slowly ran them down his face. He needed more caffeine. He was ready to prepare his response when Finn cut in again.

“Also, I found this in her room.”

His eyes snapped up to meet the shining piece of metal in Finn’s hand. He would recognize a holo chip anywhere, but the question was why did Rey have one. It clicked the moment the thought crossed his mind. She wanted to find whoever was in charge, who employed Ava.

“Dammit. I knew something felt off. I have to go after her.”

He was up in a second, surprising himself with a newfound energy he was certain he no longer possessed. It wasn’t until a hand came up to his shoulder to stop him that he realized how exhausted he really was.

“Hey, hey how about I go after her and you make sure everything is fine here. You have enough to deal with already.”

He was definitely not going to argue with that. He was most defiantly going to collapse the second Finn was out of the door. Instead of protesting, Poe nodded in acceptance as he placed a hand on Finn’s shoulder.

“Thank you Finn. Looks like we’ll be staying in Naboo a little longer than I thought.”

————  
Everything had been dark since he last spoke to his mother’s force projection. Time seemed to move slower than he ever deemed possible in this space. He received small pictures here and there of long lost memories and visions he could no longer decipher. The more time he spent in this state, the more he seemed to go insane. This was a nightmare he simply couldn’t awake from. 

“Ben?”

And as if things couldn’t get any worse, now he was hearing his father’s voice too. Turning on his heels, he could feel the tension begin to set in his shoulders before his eyes fully locked into the silhouette he long destroyed. 

“Han Solo.”

His voice wasn’t as solid as he hoped it to be, not with his deceased father standing before him as clear as if he were still alive and well. Ben could feel his heart pound violently against his chest as he looked back into the eyes of the man he stabbed through the heart years ago.

“Ben.”

His father’s voice was as clear as it had ever been. A little rough from age he presumed, but the same amount of snakiness he always remembered. Too bad this was all just a dream. Ben paced back and force in a small circle as he cleared his throat. His hand were tangled in his hair as he responded.

“Now I know I’ve finally lost it. You’re not actually here are you?”

“Kid, I’m not even going to begin to understand this force mumbo jumbo. I’ve just learned to accept where it takes me.”

He stilled in place, turning only briefly to catch the smallest sliver of a lopsided smirk on his father’s face. 

“Then you’re…. How?”

Han simply shrugged, hands stuffed in his pockets as he responded.

“Your guess is as good as mine.”

Ben was turned around fully now, face to face with the man who raised him - well, mostly- and he was at a loss for words. His eyes stung as he met his father’s gaze.

“Dad I-I’m…”

He was prepared to launch into an apologia, but Han’s hand came up to stop him. He had never been one for sentimental things.

“I know kid. It’s probably better this way. I mean I should thank you. You saved me from having to pay back Kangiclub - those little bastards.”

He was tempted to roll his eyes, but he refrained given the situation. He didn’t know if he would ever get the chance to do this again so he tried once more.

“Still, I-“

“Save it. I knew the second I faced you on that bridge that I was as good as dead. I was never there for you kid, I guess it was just a wake up call.”

Han looked him up and down before taking a few step forward. Ben was only a inch or two taller, but somehow he felt like he was transported back in time to when he was a child. His father’s rough and calloused hand hovered for a moment before clamping down on his own shoulder. His other hand came up to meet Ben’s face much like he had years ago.

“But look at you now. I always knew that girl would do something important. She’s a strong one - stubborn as hell, but she’s got a heart of gold.”

Ben could feel his lips turn up slightly at the thought of Rey before turning back down.

“Yeah, she’s pretty special. I just don’t think she’d forgive me for everything I’ve done.”

Han shook him a little as he replied sternly.

“Kid, she’s already forgiven you - a long time ago- and you know it.”

Ben felt his head nod slightly in acceptance - of course she had forgiven him, she had too big of a heart not to. He almost lost himself to his own thoughts when his father’s voice cut through again.

“Hey, look we don’t have much more time.”

Panic started to settle in his stomach at those words. He still hadn’t said what he wanted to. He needed to get it out, to get it off his chest. Maybe then he wouldn’t feel so weighed down.

“I’m sorry.”

Han’s smirk was in full force now as he winked back at his son.

“I know.”

He gave Ben one last pat on the back before he started to fade. 

“Keep and eye on that girl!”

“What? Why?”

“Han!”

“Dad!”

It was too late. He was gone - vanished into thin air only to be replaced by a blinding white light. The weight on his chest seemed to increase significantly as the light increased. Ben was slightly aware of voices speaking in muffled voices all around him. 

“He’s waking up!”

The voice gradually got clearer with each passing minute until the seemed too loud to bare.

“Someone comm the general!”

His head was throbbing and his chest was on fire. 

“He’s on his way.”

Everything seemed so surreal when he finally opened his eyes. The shouting match that had taken place in the room before was now replaced by an eerie silence. The room itself was bland and held a strange scent. It had smelt as if they had tried to mask the metallic scent of blood with a flowery room freshener - Ben found it sickening. The weight on his chest was made more present as he let his eyes scan over his own body. A metal contraption was fastened to his chest which connected back to several wires. He vaguely recalled why he was here, but not how he got here. It almost seemed like another nightmare, the way the room was bare and empty. He almost believed it was until the door creaked open and he was met with a very tired looking Poe Dameron looking down at him. His first instinct was to get up and move, but the pilot quickly reached out to stop him. 

“Hey big guy, welcome back. You’re going to need to hold still. There are a bunch of machines strapped up to you.”

Ben would have rolled his eyes if he wasn’t so consumed by the pain that flared up in his chest. With a long sigh and small grunt, he relaxed back onto the bed, prompting Poe to keep talking.

“Weird how things work out huh? Last time we met, I was the one who was strapped up.”

That sparked a flare within him. Were they going to interrogate him now? He wouldn’t put it past the man. After all, he hadn’t been too friendly the last time he encountered the pilot. Nevertheless, Ben shot him a warning glare. 

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to interrogate you yet. Rey would probably kill me if I did.”

Dameron had his hands held up in mock surrender as he spoke quickly in explanation, but Ben only cared about the name he heard escape from the man’s lips. Rey. Where was she? His father had tried to warn him about something. Was she alright? His heart monitor was starting to beep frantically now as he swallowed the lump in his throat.

“Rey?”

He didn’t miss the slight way Dameron shifted his eyes around or the way he tensed before relaxing again. 

“She’s a little… preoccupied at the moment, but I’ll send her over when she gets back.”

—————

Rey had ran. That’s the best she could manage to do at the moment. She didn’t know what had overtaken her. She had stole info from the general and intended to hunt down and kill the man responsible for all of this, but she couldn’t follow through. Part of her still desperately wanted to slaughter the man who crippled Ben and killed the beloved Leia Organa, but she was fighting hard to ignore that. Instead she had escaped the large ship the resistance was staying on, and made her way into Naboo. Leia’s funeral had been the night before and it was as beautiful as a funeral could be - she only wished Ben had been awake to see it. 

Her heart pounded hard in her chest and her lungs racked against her rib cage as she continued to run through the city. Truthfully she didn’t know if she would be able to stop. The pain was distracting her from her newfound dark impulses and emotional distress. She was on the verge of a breakdown and the longer she ran, the longer she avoided the inevitable. That’s what she always did - try to keep optimistic. When her parents abandoned her she told herself they would return. When Ben seemed irredeemable, she tried to turn him. She always prided herself on her strength and determination, but right now she was utterly defeated and her body was beginning to crash. It wasn’t until she spotted a flowing fountain covered in lavender and white colored flowers that she finally stopped running. She found herself gasping for air as her legs collapsed onto the edge of the beautiful marble fountain. Reaching down into the water, Rey cupped some of it in her hand and splashed it into her flushed face as she shifted to lay down. Looking up at the fountain, she realized it was carved to resemble a woman. Her eyes scanned over the regal way this figure held herself. Her heart rate was slowly decreasing when a voice cut through the silent night.

“Peanut?”

Her body was exhausted. She couldn’t manage to lift a single finger, even when Finn rushed to her side and placed a warm hand on her shoulder before quickly retracting it.

“Force you’re freezing. Come here. Take this.”

Her dear friend slowly helped her up into a seated position before tugging his own jacket off and placing it around her shoulders. Silence met them for a moment or two before she finally whispered back a quick.

“I’m sorry.”

She felt Finn shift slightly next to her so he could face her. His hand came up under her chin prompting her to look back at him as he questioned.

“Hey, it’s okay. Are you okay?”

She looked back into the concerned eyes of her best friend before shaking his hand away. She opted to cradle her head in her hands as she let out a shaky breathe. Everything was falling apart. It felt as if the world was crashing around her.

“Everything is my fault Finn. If I had kept an eye on Ben, thought through the plan…. Maybe he would be fine and Leia would be alive.”

Finn scoffed beside her. She could practically see the way he rolled his eyes as she began to protest.

“Is that what you’re beating yourself about? You didn’t have any control over that.”

“It’s not just that. I- I don’t know what’s happening to me.”

“Is this about what happened with Ava? You snapped peanut, but everyone does at some point.”

Her head finally snapped back up to meet Finn’s gaze as she pronounced every word she said.

“Yeah, but this was different.”

She saw the confusion in her friend’s eyes, the way he looked down at her like she wasn’t making any sense at all. Rey could feel her eyes shift and darken as she explained the energy that had been flowing through her.

“I liked it. I liked the darkness that filled me.”

“The darkness.”

Finn’s confusion quickly turned into concern as he shifted uncomfortably, eyeing her cautiously as if she were about to explode at any moment before he reached into his pocket. He fumbled for a second before retrieving a crumbled piece of paper. She knew what it was immediately. It was her hit list. The one with the name of the man who made all of this happen - who had caused her spiral into darkness. Finn cleared his throat before speaking up.

“Is that why I found this in your room? Were you planning on going after him?”

She practically flinched at the accusatory tone of his voice, but she did not offer him a response or explanation.

“What if he wasn’t the right guy? Rey, we could help you. Everyone loves you and cares about you. We will figure something out, okay? Whatever you need.”

Finn offered her a hand, placing it firmly on her leg and squeezing. She could practically feel her heart break at the confession. It was true - she had a support system now… a family. A shaky sigh escaped her lips before she croaked out a response.

“I think I just need a break from everything for a little while.”

Finn simply nodded and gathered her up in a massive bear hug, tickling her neck as he whispered back.

“Okay. That’s probably for the best.”

They stayed like that for a long time. Not a care in the world besides the comforting touch of a friend. That was until Finn’s comm beeped frantically on his wrist. He pulled back slowly before looking down at the device. 

“One second, it’s Poe.”

He stepped away from her to take the call. She watched as he paced back and forth listening to Poe speak. She couldn’t hear what Poe was telling him, but she could hear Finn as clear as day.

“What happened?”

Finn listened to Poe for another few seconds before he clicked the comm to end the call and turned back towards Rey. He was wearing a solemn and almost pained expression on his face as he approached her. He didn’t bother to take a seat as he looked down at her and spoke.

“Kylo’s awake.”

———

He felt her presence before he saw her. When she finally rounded the corner and entered his room, he took in every inch of her. She looked exhausted - poor thing. Her hair was folded into a messy bun that was falling out in practically every direction and her eyes had dark circles under them as if she hadn’t slept in weeks. He searched her hazel eyes, trying to pinpoint something. They were different - she was different, but he couldn’t quite figure out what it was. He was still staring at her when she croaked out his name.

“Ben.”

He gave her a weak smile as she started to walk towards him.

“Hey.”

Poe cleared his throat, but neither of them at let their eyes wander from each other, even when Poe spoke up. 

“I’ll give you two a second.”

Ben managed to look over her shoulder briefly at the pilot before giving him a quick nod.

“Thank you.”

As soon as the door clicked shut behind Dameron, Rey reached for a chair and perched right next to him before rapid firing questions his way.

“How are you feeling? Are you in pain? What can I do for you?”

A small laugh escaped him before he could stop it.

“I’m fine.”

He expected her to ease up a little after seeing him alive and well, but she still seemed concerned. Her eyes were locked onto his as she whispered in a defeated voice.

“Ben.”

He responded firmly back.

“Rey.”

He let out a small sigh before he continued.

“Thank you.”

He watched as her eye filled up with emotion before she responded back. Her hand was now laced in his new mechanical hand. He wished he could feel the way her hand squeezed his as she spoke.

“I thought she killed you.”

Ben nodded in understand before reaching his free hand over to cup her chin. Her skin was freezing, but he ignored that for the moment.

“How are you holding up? I’m sure you went through a beating after I went down.”

He didn’t miss the way her eyes darkened a moment before softening again. 

“I killed Ava.”

It was almost as if it pained her to admit that. He shrugged as he took in the way she shifted uncomfortably, dodging his questioning eyes.

“I figured as much.”

Finally she met his gaze again, this time her eyes were back to the same soft hazel he knew so well. Tears were starting to build in the corners of her eyes as she tried to get her voice to work.

“Ben- I- your mom- the general she-“

He squeezed her hand with his own before admitting.

“Is dead. I know.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.”

Her head tilted to the side as her eyebrows squished together in concern. 

“Is it really though?”

He shook his head, but he kept his voice steady as he replied.

“No, but it will be eventually.”

That’s when the tears finally started to flow down the sides of her face. She was in pain, he could tell that much from the bond that was buzzing around them, but it was not physical pain and that seemed to worry him even more. He shook all thoughts aside for the moment. He was finally wake and Rey was with him - he was not going to ruin that by questioning the dark energy surrounding her signature. Instead he shifted as best as he could in his bed to make room for her and motioned for her to join him.

“Come here.”


End file.
